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Post by mistersocko on Aug 6, 2024 22:43:32 GMT 1
Just a couple of things to add. First and more importantly: sorry for the Wyatt segments. I came up with the idea some time ago but it must have been pretty obvious since I see they're doing something similar (though a lot better) on RAW. I considered scrapping the whole thing or going in another direction but a) it all felt a bit artificial and b) I was running out of time so, here we are. It is what it is.
Second, if you're reading this as regularly as my erratic posting allows: I'll be on vacation for a couple of weeks so I won't be able to post anything until September. The writing still feels pretty hit-and-miss so maybe taking a step back will actually be a blessing in disguise. Anyway, thanks if you're reading this and have a nice summer!
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Post by mistersocko on Sept 22, 2024 22:42:18 GMT 1
Friday, September Wk2, 2023
From Milwaukee, WI
COLE AND MCAFEE INTRODUCTION
 
Michael Cole: Welcome everyone to Friday Night SmackDown! I’m Michael Cole and this is my broadcast partner Pat McAfee. Six nights ago at Bad Blood, Gunther retained the Universal Championship in difficult circumstances and survived a potential Money in the Bank cash-in from John Morrison. He has since vowed to make Adam Pearce, the SmackDown General Manager, pay for what he perceives as unfair treatment.
Pat McAfee: Saying that these two don’t see eye to eye might be the understatement of the year but neither can afford to dwell on the past. People looking to take the Universal Championship off Gunther’s hands are a dime a dozen at the moment but he isn’t the only champion facing a challenge.
Michael Cole: Indeed. A few minutes from now, Edge will put his Intercontinental Championship on the line against Powerhouse Hobbs and with JBL in Hobbs’ corner, anything can happen. But that’s not all: after winning a gruesome triple threat match at Bad Blood, Ronda Rousey appears as a natural contender for Becky Lynch’s SmackDown Women’s Championship. How will The Man deal with that new threat?
Pat McAfee: She smashed Rhea Ripley’s face – literally – at Bad Blood. I’m not sure I’d want to be next in line right now.
Michael Cole: Richard Holliday, Carlito’s new best friend, will also be in action tonight again Rey Mysterio, as will Dirty Dom, who goes one on one against Odyssey Jones in an intriguing match-up. But for now, let’s turn our attention to the Intercontinental Championship! What a way to get started! | 68
POWERHOUSE HOBBS vs EDGE (INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPIONSHIP)
 vs 
Melissa Santos: The following contest is set for one fall and it is for the Intercontinental Championship! Introducing first, the challenger, accompanied to the ring by John Bradshaw Layfied… from East Palo Alto, California… weighing in at 270 pounds… Powerhouse Hobbs!
Michael Cole: Hobbs injured himself in a losing effort against John Cena soon after making his SmackDown debut but he’s enjoying a pretty good record under the tutelage of WWE Hall of Famer JBL.
Pat McAfee: If a bulldozer took human form, he would look exactly like Hobbs! The man’s got questionable morals and zero empathy but when it comes to destroying somebody in the ring, he’s an elite tier competitor!
Melissa Santos: And his opponent… accompanied by ‘The Glamazon’ Beth Phoenix… from Toronto, Ontario, Canada… weighing in at 241 pounds… ‘The Rated R Superstar’ Edge!
Michael Cole: Edge won the Intercontinental title 62 days ago at Money in the Bank, ending Gunther’s reign a few days off a historic record. And, so far, nobody has been able to best him.
Pat McAfee: Edge isn’t the Ultimate Opportunist for nothing! He’s got an almost endless bag of tricks. Beating a Hall of Famer is never a walk in the park but it will take something special from Hobbs to come out on top tonight!
Michael Cole: There is obviously no love lost between these two competitors and Hobbs immediately goes after Edge with a takedown and a series of punches to the face but Edge has enough about him to push him away.
Pat McAfee: Beautiful right hand there from the Rated R Superstar!
Michael Cole: Hobbs goes to the ropes for momentum and you have to wonder, Pat, what kind of strategy… Oh, my God! Did you see that? Powerhouse Hobbs ran straight into a big boot! He almost took his head off there! And Edge follows it up with a basement dropkick straight to face!
Pat McAfee: Edge makes a strong start to the match. To be honest, I expected a dominant performance from Hobbs but he’s been caught flat-footed so far.
Michael Cole: Hobbs is taking a moment to regroup but Edge isn’t interested in covering him, he’s asking for a microphone instead!
Edge: Come on, big guy, is that all you got? I had been told that you had what it takes to win that championship from me. Show me!
Michael Cole: I’m not sure trash-talking his opponent was the best use of his time but he must have cleaned his clock because Hobbs is still shaking the cobwebs. Edge is pulling his opponent outside… and he smacks his head against the ring post! This match is barely started and Hobbs is already in all kinds of trouble!
Pat McAfee: JBL is going ballistic! One taste of steel and bam goes Hobbs!
Michael Cole: I’m afraid it’s not over… Edge rams him into the post again! And a third time! Powerhouse Hobbs is busted open. Maybe attacking Edge and his wife wasn’t the wisest course of action, in the end. Oh! Edge is relentless and he shoves the challenger kidney-first into the ring apron. Hobbs is being manhandled so far in this match and that’s probably the biggest surprise considering how dominant… Oh, no! Edge pushed him into the post again and this time, Hobbs collapsed. Did you see that spray of blood when his head hit the steel? Pat McAfee: When he says he’s got grit, Edge isn’t kidding. He’s looked very strong so far tonight. This could be a statement: people will think twice before messing with him.
Michael Cole: Edge is going to the timekeeper are you… What’s he doing? He’s bringing back the bell as Hobbs is making his way up… Oh, my goodness! Inverted DDT on the bell!
Pat McAfee: He just crashed the back of another human being’s skull on another piece of cold, hard steel.
Michael Cole: It’s worth mentioning that Edge has quite the reputation as a hardcore specialist, too. Edge, ignoring JBL’s rant, is now carrying Hobbs’ massive frame to the timekeeper’s table. You can see in his eyes that he’s got some evil intentions here. That’s what the Intercontinental Championship means to him! He’s willing to pull all the stops! Edge’s got a chair in hand but he’s heading back to the ring. Oh, my God… I think I know where this is going…
Pat McAfee: He’s climbing to the top turnbuckle! The fans are loving it! You can hear the ‘this is awesome’ chants echoing around the arena but referee Charles Robinson disagrees.
Michael Cole: Robinson is trying to pull the chair away, which is a brave move considering Edge has been absolutely lethal since the beginning of this match… They’re struggling… Oh, my God! Watch out!
Pat McAfee: The referee threw Edge off the top turnbuckle! He crashed right in front of us!
Michael Cole: It’s an accident but the damage has been done! Beth Phoenix is all over Robinson, while JBL is trying to revive Hobbs! This could be a turning point in this match! This could be a disaster for Edge, who’s been knocked unconscious! Hobbs might be suffering from a concussion though… his stare is completely blank!
Pat McAfee: He’s covering Edge! But it’s not a falls count anywhere match!
Michael Cole: JBL is directing traffic as Hobbs hesitantly throws Edge back inside the ring. My God, Hobbs’ face is a bloody mess… what a disturbing picture! Edge hasn’t moved but it looks the momentum is about to shift in a massive way… Death Valley bomb! Edge almost went through the mat! Hobbs with the cover! Is this enough? 1… 2… No! Beth Phoenix pulled Edge away!
Pat McAfee: She probably felt he didn’t deserve to lose his belt that way.
Michael Cole: Hobbs is irate and he’s not the only one… Oh! No! JBL hit Phoenix with a clothesline from hell! He’s completely lost his mind! It’s an understatement to say that the Duluth crowd aren’t too pleased with his actions… It’s pandemonium behind us! Meanwhile, Hobbs has dropped down to finish off Edge… who catches him with a right hand! Holy… Hobbs’ head bounces against the ring post again! How many times has Edge done it? I’ve lost count!
Pat McAfee: They’re tearing each other apart! There will be no one left to wear the belt!
Michael Cole: Edge is setting up Hobbs on the apron… He’s going for a suplex… but Hobbs blocks it! It’s impossible! I think he’s running on pure rage… Edge tries his luck again… no dice. Now, it’s Hobbs’ turn… Oh! Wow! Powerbomb! Powerhouse Hobbs just powerbombed Edge on the concrete floor! Did you hear that sickening sound?
Pat McAfee: Edge has a history of neck injuries. He could be seriously injured! Michael Cole: The referee should stop this but he’s lost control of the match. Hobbs now picks up the lifeless body of Edge and throws him back inside… That’s not going to be pretty… Sit-out powerbomb! It’s over! 1… 2… 3… No! Edge kicked out at the last second!
Pat McAfee: Where did he find the strength to do that?
Michael Cole: I have no idea and neither does Hobbs, judging by the frustrated look on what’s left his face. And you can see how much this prestigious title means to both competitors by the amount of punishment they’re willing to withstand for a chance to win it. Hobbs is quite the specimen but he’s lost a lot of blood already. He has to end this quick now.
Pat McAfee: Looks like he heard you…
Michael Cole: He’s going for the Town Business, his finisher… but he’s too dizzy! He just can’t hold Edge across his shoulders! He drops to one knee… and Edge doesn’t need to be told twice… Off the ropes he goes… Spear! Spear! He’s got him! 1… 2… 3! Edge retains!
Pat McAfee: Time was always on Edge’s side once Hobbs’ forehead was split open but you have to give credit to the guy. His moves pack quite a punch and with just four or five hits, he almost took out one of the toughest SOBs in WWE history!
Winner by pinfall and still Intercontinental champion: Edge in 10:53 | 70
CODY IS BACK
Michael Cole: Edge lives to defend the Intercontinental title another day but Hobbs gave him hell.
Melissa Santos: Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome… ‘The American Nightmare’ Cody Rhodes!
Pat McAfee: He’s back!
Michael Cole: Cody Rhodes was drafted to SmackDown a month ago as Roman Reigns headed in the opposition direction to defend the WWE title on RAW but as he was spending the evening in a San Antonio nightclub, an unknown attacker stabbed him three times in the back. We had been told he was on his way to full recovery but this is a sight to behold!
Cody Rhodes: So… Milwaukee… What do you want to talk about? As you can see, reports of my demise were exaggerated. One month, a huge scare and a few scars later, here I am on SmackDown. Don’t take it personally but I’ve got to be honest and say this isn’t where I wanted to be. Hear me out! I had a story to finish and that coward Roman Reigns managed to dodge the bullet. But they can keep us apart as long as they want, it won’t change who I am. I’m the son of a son of a plumber and I have a story to finish. Nothing will ever change that. That story will get the ending it deserves or I’ll die trying to bring that title to the Rhodes family! But let’s not get ahead of ourselves. I’m the new kid on the block here, I know that. I also know that the guy who beat me to the finish line and took the title off Roman Reigns is just as corrupt as he is. This man, Gunther, is a racist and a bigot. That doesn’t sit well me nor, I’m sure, with any of you. But I didn’t become the American Nightmare by asking for give-outs. I’m going to end Gunther’s reign but I’ll do it right: by starting my journey at the bottom of the ladder. I’m ok with that because I know each and every one of you will be there with me, every step of the way! So, here’s my message to you, to Adam Pearce, to Triple H and to Gunther: I’m here to fight! Send me anyone and when you run out of flunkies, bring out your tin-pot champ and let’s get it on! Because I won’t have it any other way! | 75
MMM HITS BACK
Michael Cole: Strong words from Cody Rhodes who will no doubt… Hold on a moment… We’re being told that there’s an incident in the backstage area. Do we have a camera there?
[John Morrison, Otis, man.soor and R-Truth have invaded the locker room area and are scaring everybody away, baseball bats in hands.]
Michael Cole: It’s Maxximum Male Models! What are they doing here?
Pat McAfee: I’m guessing Morrison isn’t too happy with what happened at Bad Blood, when AJ Styles prevented him from cashing in his Money in the Bank contract!
[Morrison spots the cameraman and gets closer.]
John Morrison: So, what do you say, Styles, uh? You still want to teach me the error of my ways? You still think the four of us are weaker together? Why don’t you come out of whatever hole you’re hiding in and say it straight to my face, you little weasel? We’re going to destroy everything in our path until we find you and when we do, I’ll make sure you won’t even dream about sticking your nose in my business, m**********r!
Michael Cole: This is a pretty serious situation developing backstage but we’re being told that Adam Pearce is working on it. We’ll be back right after the break! Don’t go anywhere! | 67
ALLIE KAT AND NATALYA vs LACEY EVANS AND CARMELLA
Melissa Santos: The following contest is a tag team match set for one fall. Introducing first, from the streets of Austin, Texas… she is ‘One Thicc Kitten’ Allie Kat! And her tag team partner, from Calgary, Alberta, Canada… she is ‘The Queen of Harts’ Natalya!
Michael Cole: We’re back at ringside folks with another competitor making her SmackDown debut, the very… unique, shall we say, Allie Kat.
Pat McAfee: Allie fancies herself as a ‘catwoman’ – literally. But don’t let her pretty face and unusual ring style fool you: she’s as fierce as they come and she’s also a deathmatch specialist.
Melissa Santos: And their opponents… first, from Parris Island, South Carolina… Lacey Evans! And her tag team partner… making her way to the ring… from Staten Island… Carmella!
Michael Cole: I’d say that both teams are fairly crazy as Carmella and Evans have about as much in common as Allie Kat and Natalya do. Anyway, Natakya and Carmella will get us started and the Princess of Staten Island is first in action with a wristlock… nicely done… but Natalya reverses it and hits back with a side headlock.
Pat McAfee: I’m not sure Carmella – or most people for that matter – want a technical battle with Natalya. She’s been trained at the Hart Dungeon and she probably knows her way out of every hold.
Michael Cole: Hip toss by Natalya while her partner is… licking herself in the corner?
Pat McAfee: She says it’s not a gimmick, it’s a way of life.
Michael Cole: Alright… Meanwhile, Carmella is back in it with a headscissor but Natalya squirms out of it. Both women are back to a vertical base and Carmella goes on the attack with a kick to the midsection. She sends Natalya for a ride… misses wildly with a right hand… and Natalya almost takes her head off with a discus clothesline!
Pat McAfee: Looks like the Kat will be able to take a nap for a SmackDown debut.
Michael Cole: Natalya is on fire tonight! She sends Evans down with an elbow… Carmella is right behind her tough, looking for a suplex… but Natalya lands on her feet and connects with a hard kick to the base of the spine. Carmella is in trouble! Natalya drags her back to her corner and in comes Allie Kat! Roll-up! 1… 2… Carmella kicks out. Carmella recently said she wants to win the Women’s Tag Team Championship and… Wait a minute! Kick to the midsection from Allie… Katdriver! My God! What an impact!
Pat McAfee: I told you, she’s not afraid to use dangerous moves.
Michael Cole: And what is she… she’s meowing at the crowd now?
Pat McAfee: I guess you can take the Allie out of the Kat but you can’t take the Kat out of the Allie.
Michael Cole: Carmella is using that unexpected distraction to regroup and get some distance between herself and her bizarre opponent. She looks as puzzled as me for the moment. Oh-oh… I think Allie Kat noticed her from the corner of her eye… Carmella doesn’t know what to do… Oh! No! Did you hear that sound? Allie Kat rushed at her and connected with a massive headbutt!
Pat McAfee: I think they’re both out! But Allie fell on top…
Michael Cole: The referee makes the count… 1… 2… and a kick out from Carmella. This is such a weird match but the crowd seems to be into it. They’re clapping for Allie Kat! Carmella is crawling to her corner.
She wants nothing to do with Allie, it seems. She’s hot on her trail… Oh! And Carmella stops her dead in her tracks with a nasty superkick.
Pat McAfee: Rookie mistake here by Allie!
Michael Cole: And the momentum is swinging again in the match… Carmella, with an Irish Whip on Allie Kat, who crashes chest-first into the opposite corner. Evans will deliver her Women’s Right… Oh! No! What a disaster! Carmella was looking for a splash, Allie ducked out of the way and Evans inadvertently knocked out her own partner! She won’t be able to dwell on that mistake though, as Allie catches her with a move she calls the LariKat! Off the apron goes Evans… Allie Kat with the cover… 1… 2… 3! It’s over!
Pat McAfee: Allie Kat’s career on SmackDown gets off a perfect start. She’s certainly unlike anything we’ve ever seen.
Winners by pinfall: Allie Kat and Natalya in 6:10 | 63
TIME OF RECKONING
Michael Cole: Pat, as we mentioned, Gunther successfully defended his Universal title at Bad Blood but, as you can imagine, that result left some people disappointed. Here’s what happened earlier today.
[Adam Pearce is working in his office when someone knocks at the door.]
Adame Pearce: Come in.
[Enter Gunther, Ludwig Kaiser, Giovanni Vinci and Valhalla.]
Gunther: Ah, Herr Pearce. What an ugly little office for an ugly little man.
Adam Pearce: I beg your pardon?
Gunther: You heard me the first time. It seems you forgot to congratulate me.
Adam Pearce: You seem to think I have something against you. I just give the fans a match that would…
Gunther: Please, Herr Pearce, don’t waste any more of my time. You set me up but you little conspiracy blew up in your face. I will deal with Valhalla later but for now, let’s talk about you. You enjoy putting people in difficult situations, don’t you, Herr Pearce? It makes you feel powerful.
Adam Pearce: What, you think you’re Sigmund Freud now?
Gunther: Since you like high-stake matches, here’s what I suggest: find yourself someone who will challenge me for my title. If your man wins, fair enough – your wish is granted. If he loses, you will resign from your position as SmackDown General Manager.
Adam Pearce: Why would I do that?
Gunther: Because this is my show and I don’t like you. Or because if you don’t, you will spend a lot of time on a hospital bed.
Adam Pearce: You really are a sick bastard! You should never have raised your paws on me in the first place! Alright, you want to play it that way? Works for me. I’m not afraid of you! I’ll start looking for a challenger next week but since you obviously think I’m abusing my powers, I’ll start by putting you in a title match, tonight, against Drew McIntyre. If he beats you, he’ll spare me the trouble of looking for a challenger.
Gunther: Worst decision you could have made. You really are a loser.
Adam Pearce: Make sure you don’t become one yourself if you don’t want to end up with egg on your face.
Gunther: Come with me, we have a match to prepare.
[The Imperium leave the place, as Pearce looks on with a worried look on his face.] | 74
WHERE’S VEER
[As the Imperium make their way out, Drake Maverick is waiting for them on the outside.]
Drake Maverick: Hey, mate. I wasn’t listening or anything but… from the outside, that felt tense, didn’t?
Ludwig Kaiser: What do you want?
Drake Maverick: Oh, I wasn’t sticking my nose! Don’t worry! It’s just that you were supposed to show us the ropes, remember? How to stay relevant and all that. Veer was supposed to meet with me but he hasn’t shown up. Must be late or something.
[Kaiser and Vinci sneer.]
Ludwig Kaiser: Yes, he’s late alright. He’s been released three days ago.
Drake Maverick: What?
Ludwig Kaiser: Yes, he’s been… I believe there’s a colloquial expression for that… 86ed?
Drake Maverick: But… how… why?
Ludwig Kaiser: He wasn’t serving any purpose so he was let go. Maybe someone put in a word to Mrs McMahon, who knows. Heh. By the way, when does your contract end, ‘mate’?
[Kaiser and Vinci walk away while Maverick looks dumbfounded.] | 64
ODYSSEY JONES vs DOMINIK MYSTERIO
 vs 
Melissa Santos: The following contest is set for one fall. Introducing first, from Coram, New York… weighing in at 405 pounds… Odyssey Jones!
Michael Cole: It looks like Adam Cole’s and Drake Maverick’s days on SmackDown may be numbered… but let’s get our attention back into the ring where Odyssey Jones is about to make his debut on the blue brand.
Pat McAfee: Jones is the embodiment of the proverbial immovable force! Granted, he’s yet to win a major title but what he lacks in experience, he more than makes up for in strength!
Melissa Santos: And his opponent… making his way to the ring, accompanied by Luke Gallows… representing the Judgement Day… from San Diego, California… weighing in at 200 pounds… ‘Dirty’ Dominik Mysterio!
Michael Cole: The rise of that sorry little punk will forever remain the greatest mystery of my career. I’m not even sure he ever won a match clean!
Pat McAfee: I can’t help you there, Cole. His girlfriend is recovering from a broken face and there he is, acting like he doesn’t have a care in the world. He just replaced her with baldie, here. What a sad excuse for a human being!
Michael Cole: Hopefully, Jones will be able to teach him a lesson as he enjoys a considerable size advantage. The referee is about to call for the bell and… Hey, look at that! Mysterio tried to get a kick in before the match began but Jones blocked him! Oh, wow! He just planted Mysterio in the ring with that Earth-shattering Uranage! Cover! 1… 2… and a kick out.
Pat McAfee: Whoever booked this match obviously wanted to teach Dirty Dom a lesson. Let’s see how he could weasel his way out of that one!
Michael Cole: Jones and Mysterio are back to a vertical base… Dominik misses with an elbow… Jones sidesteps him… Released German suplex! He sent him tumbling across the ring, all the way to the ropes. Feeling the urgency, Mysterio quickly gets back to his feet but Jones is already upon him with a kick… but he misses.
Pat McAfee: Oh-oh! Jones’ leg is tangled into the ropes…
Michael Cole: Dominik goes up… and he hits the target with a flying high knee to the side of the head. Like it or loath it but that Mysterio certainly knows an opportunity when he sees one. It’s just a shame that he’s acting like a spoiled brat. Cover… 1… and Jones easily pushes him away.
Pat McAfee: No matter what, I can’t see how Dominik could win this one under normal circumstances. He needs to bring the fight outside and maybe look for something to even the playing field otherwise, he’s in for a long night.
Michael Cole: Or a very short one for that matter, as Jones catches him for a second uranage! Dominik is trying to crawl away but Jones picks him up… Bossman Slam! Ha! That little punk is finally getting the beating he deserves! Cover! 1… 2… 3… No! Mysterio managed to grab the ropes! Michael Cole: Mysterio is wisely rolling out of the ring, trying to buy himself some time. He didn’t get far though… Jones grabbed him by the head! My God! Did you see that? He lifted him with one hand and threw him back in with authority! That’s power for you!
Pat McAfee: Dom is starting to look desperate… Ah, as I expected Gallows is getting into the referee’s face now.
Michael Cole: It won’t make a difference… Oh! No! Low blow! I can’t believe it! You take your eyes off this guy for five seconds and this is what you get! He can’t win like this! No! 1… 2… Jones raises the shoulder! This may have been Mysterio’s last chance. He looks around him frantically, hoping to find something to get him out of trouble…
Pat McAfee: Jones is fuming! This isn’t going to end well…
Michael Cole: Mysterio goes for broke with a dropkick but he misses by a mile… Oh, my God! He hit referee Chip Danning from behind! He did it on purpose! He should be disqualified!
Pat McAfee: Suddenly, I’m not so sure about the ending of this match.
Michael Cole: Oh, no. Luke Gallows sneaks in with a steel chair. It’s a two-on-one assault! That’s… I mean, there’s no words! Is there anything – and I do mean anything – Dominik Mysterio can do on his own!
Pat McAfee: Dom is having an idea and I doubt that’s something you’ll enjoy, Cole.
Michael Cole: They’re not going to…?! They’re going for the Magic Killer! It’s the finisher Gallows used when he was teaming up with Karl Anderson! The same Karl Anderson the Judgement Day put out of commission! You have got to be kidding me! How disrespectful is that? Look at that sick smile on Dom’s face. It’s just… urgh. And now, of course, Gallows is going to ringside to revive the referee. Mysterio from the top rope… Frog Splash. 1… 2… 3. It’s all over.
Pat McAfee: Dominik has a way of pushing everyone’s buttons that is quite unique, you have to give him that. Every time he’s in the ring, he does something abject. Tonight was no different.
Winner by pinfall: Dominik Mysterio in 6:31 | 50
ROUSEY’S READY
Melissa Santos: Ladies and gentlemen… please welcome… The Baddest Woman on the Planet… ‘Rowdy’ Ronda Rousey!
Michael Cole: Ronda Rousey has made it clear that she wants to be the SmackDown’s Women’s champion again and her victory over Alexa Bliss and Sasha Banks at Bad Blood certainly adds a lot of weight to her ambitions.
Pat McAfee: With Rhea Ripley out of the picture for the time being, Ronda certainly is one of the strongest contenders but Becky Lynch has been absolutely dominant in 2023 and taking the belt away from her will take a massive effort.
Ronda Rousey: Ok, people, shut up and listen. I’d like my stay in this dump of a city to be as brief as possible. And don’t expect Shayna to make an appearance tonight after the beatings I gave her – repeatedly. She may be a follower at heart but she’s smart enough to stay away from the limelight and lick her wounds when she’s been comprehensively beaten. Speaking of which… less than a week ago, I pinned Short Stuff in the ring and as a bonus, I drove the other turncoat through a table. I think it’s time for…
[Sasha Banks’ music hits]
Michael Cole: It’s boss time!
Sasha Banks: Hold on a moment, Ronda. I’d like you to keep my name out of your mouth. Last time I checked, you didn’t pin the Boss!
Ronda Rousey: My God, you’re even dumber than you look and that’s saying something when you look at that ring gear. Last time I saw you, you were lying in a pile of debris, looking at the bright lights on the ceiling and wondering how you got there in the first place. So why don’t you skip along and get yourself a feud with someone on your level? There’s plenty of jobbers around here who collect a pay check just for turning in.
Sasha Banks: What are you talking about? I’m one of the most decorated champions of this generation. I’ve done it all and make no mistake: when my name is on the card, people come to see me! You want to talk about ability? You’ve put on half-assed performances for weeks now. You’re a fraud. You rode on Shayna’s coattails, only chiming in to get the pin. The truth is, there’s no point in having you in a title match because there wouldn’t be a match at all.
Ronda Rousey: Ok, thanks for your input, loser. The bottom line is, I put you and Short Stuff out at Bad Blood. I’ll take your expert opinion a lot more seriously once you actually win a match.
Pat McAfee: That kind of comment isn’t going to sit well with an egomaniac like Sasha.
Michael Cole: Indeed, they’re unloading on each other in the middle of the ring. Ronda does have a point though. She completely ruined Sasha’s return. Whether that will come back to haunt her is another story. WWE officials are coming out to pull these ladies apart. Stay with us folks, we’ll be right back. | 85
NEW DAY HIT BACK
Michael Cole: We’re back at ringside, ladies and gentlemen, just as the Judgement Day are making their way to the ring.
Pat McAfee: It seems they’ve got something to say but this crowd isn’t interested.
Michael Cole: Can you really blame them? Last week, Big E made an emotional return on SmackDown after a career-threatening neck injury but the moment was ruined by the Judgement Day’s unprovoked attack.
Pat McAfee: The boos are blowing the roof off. Whatever’s the justification to their actions, I don’t think they’ll be able to pass their message.
Michael Cole: It has to be said that Big E was rushed back to the hospital after Damian Priest threw him off the top turnbuckle with a Razor’s Edge. His condition is unknown as we speak but, of course, we wish him a speedy recovery.
Pat McAfee: Look at the smile on their faces. They’re not here to give cause or reason. They’re just enjoying the moment.
Michael Cole: Conspicuous by her absence is Rhea Ripley, who was severely injured by Becky Lynch at Bad Blood. The Judgement Day is just… Watch out!
 
Pat McAfee: It’s Kofi Kingston and Xavier Woods! And they’ve left the pancakes at home! They’ve come with baseball bats!
Michael Cole: Look at the expression on Woods’ face! I’ve never seen him like that! The New Day was all about positivity and fun and jokes but what happened to Big E last week has changed them! They look feral!
Pat McAfee: Woods almost took Dom’s head off with that swing. The Judgement Day are running away like a pack of rats caught in the light! Kross was slower and he took a nasty hit on the hip – it’s already turning blue.
Michael Cole: Gallows is favouring his forearm too. The two of them cleared the ring in a matter of seconds. I think this is the first time since Karrion Kross and Scarlett took control of the Judgement Day that they have endured such a debacle. They’ve crossed all the lines for months now and got away with it. Maybe they went too far this time.
Pat McAfee: Couldn’t happen to nicer guys. | 68
RICHARD HOLLIDAY vs REY MYSTERIO
 vs 
Melissa Santos: The following contest is set for one fall. Introducing first, accompanied to the ring by Carlito… from Wesport, Connecticut… weighing in at 237 pounds… he is ‘The Most Marketable Man in Wrestling’… Richard Holliday!
Michael Cole: Holliday is a new addition to SmackDown but he’s already proved to be a cunning and ruthless competitor, bouncing back from a debut loss to form an unexpected partnership with Carlito.
Pat McAfee: I’ll be honest, his business-based approach to wrestling does nothing for me but he did beat the current tag team champions, alongside Carlito. Whether he can cut it as a singles competitor is another matter.
Melissa Santos: And his opponent, making his way to the ring… from San Jose, California… weighing in at 175 pounds… Rey Mysterio!
Michael Cole: For more than two decades, Rey Mysterio’s name has been synonymous with giant-killing feats in WWE. With all due respect, I’d say that his son is the only blur on his resumé.
Pat McAfee: You name a title and there’s a good chance Rey Mysterio is a former champion. Even though his best days are behind him, he still wants to test himself against the younger generation and remains a formidable competitor.
Michael Cole: The referee is calling for the belt and both men lock horns in the middle of the ring. Mysterio wriggles free and uses his superior skill to transition into a side headlock. Holliday lifts him in the air but Mysterio shifts his weight… he goes over Holliday’s head and into a deep sleeper hold!
Pat McAfee: Rey knows the answer to every question in the book. If Holliday isn’t more careful, this could be a very short match.
Michael Cole: Mysterio isn’t letting go and he’s got his legs wrapped around Holliday’s ribcage, making every breath more painful. He’s fading… No! Holliday’s throws Mysterio over his shoulder and he connects with a knee drop!
Pat McAfee: Carlito’s directing traffic at ringside and that could be a huge game-changer.
Michael Cole: Mysterio’s trying to get back up but Holliday isn’t giving him any space… and he plants him with a flapjack! He’s going for the pin! One… Rey kicks out almost immediately.
Pat McAfee: I’d only trust that guy as far as I can throw him but you have to give him credit for his creativity. He sees an opportunity and he pounces on it.
Michael Cole: Sharp elbow to the back of the neck as Mysterio was trying to get back to a vertical base and Holliday is taking a break to advertise his own perfect body to the crowd.
Pat McAfee: Carlito approves… Hey! Look out! Carlito’s trying to remove Rey’s mask while the referee’s distracted!
Michael Cole: Holliday’s back on Mysterio’s case and he locks in a crossface, straining Rey Mysterio’s back. Holliday’s made a strong start to this match and he’s obviously enjoying himself… but Rey’s wriggling free and he reverses the hold into a DDT!
Pat McAfee: Rey’s got to have conflicted feelings after witnessing his punk-ass kid being whacked by Kingston and Woods just minutes ago but he still gets on with his job. That’s the mindset of a true champion. Michael Cole: He took his opponent off-guard with that moved. Holliday’s stunned in the middle of the ring and Mysterio pushes on… springboard leg drop! Right on target! He hooks the leg… but Holliday kicks out.
Pat McAfee: Rey’s getting into his groove now! He hasn’t lost a step in all these years and Holliday would be well-advised to keep a close eye on him.
Michael Cole: Holliday with a right hook but Mysterio uses his speed to duck… off the ropes he goes… Wow! Did you see that? Mysterio-rana! Rey used his momentum to throw his opponent across the ring, despite the 50-pound difference!
Pat McAfee: Carlito’s getting nervous at ringside but nobody can stop the ‘Biggest Little Man in Wrestling’ when he’s on a roll like that!
Michael Cole: Mysterio is going upstairs… high-risk manoeuvre… Frog Splash! He connects! Look at that impact! Rey literally bounced off Holliday! He’s coming back for the cover… 1… 2… Holliday survives!
Pat McAfee: The momentum has shifted in Rey’s favour! It will take something special from Holliday to climb out of the hole he has dug for himself.
Michael Cole: Mysterio is looking for another spectacular move as he tries to grab his opponent’s wrist but Holliday reverses it and turns it into a knee-bar. You can only imagine the pain Mysterio is having to endure at the moment, with Holliday using his weight to crush his knee.
Pat McAfee: It’s a clever move as grounding Mysterio is an effective way to cut off his offensive arsenal.
Michael Cole: Mysterio is stuck in the middle of the ring. Not a rope in sight while Holliday still finds the time and energy to taunt the crowd. Rey’s got nowhere to go… is he going to tap out? No! He uses his free leg to hit Holliday straight across the jaw and he has to release the hold.
Pat McAfee: Rey’s used his ‘get out of jail card’ but it looks like the damage is done. He’s having a hard time getting back to his feet.
Michael Cole: Like a vulture, Holliday is already back on the attack, working on the lower limbs with a double Boston Leg Crab. He’s obviously trying to break Mysterio’s spirit by putting him through every submission hold in the book. Rey’s howling through the pain but he hangs on.
Pat McAfee: I have to admit I didn’t expect Holliday to show such skill. Fair play to him but I don’t see Rey tapping out to someone like him.
Michael Cole: Mysterio is reaching for Holliday’s fingers, trying to break his grip… and he does! A kick sends him tumbling to the ropes and at long last, Rey’s free! He’s trying to get some feelings back into his leg, spots Holliday… the crowd are calling for it! Is he going for the 619? He bounces off the ropes… No! Springboard guillotine leg drop! Rey Mysterio took everyone by surprise and, more importantly, he almost decapitated his opponent!
Pat McAfee: The red brand on Holliday’s neck tells the whole story! His gravity-defying moves have felled some of the biggest athletes in history and that one paid off big-time!
Michael Cole: You can see Rey’s not at one hundred percent but neither is Holliday after such a massive collision. Rey’s not done though. He’s pulling him on the apron – the hardest part of the ring. He wants to finish this. Mysterio is climbing to the top turnbuckle, trying to ignore the pain in his back and in his right knee. Holliday is at his mercy. Mysterio is setting up for another Frog Splash… Oh, my God! No! Carlito snuck in behind him and pushed him just as he was about to take the jump!
Pat McAfee: The referee’s eyes were focused on Holliday! He didn’t see anything!
Michael Cole: Rey’s head bounced against the apron on his way down! This is not looking good at all.
Pat McAfee: Look at these bastards! They’re happy with themselves! I’m gutted.
Michael Cole: Rey Mysterio hasn’t moved a muscle since taking that nasty fall. Holliday’s wincing but he’s in the driver’s seat now. Gutwrench powerbomb! I’m afraid it’s all over… 1… 2… Oh! Come on! Holliday’s stopped the count to brag in front of the crowd! Who does that?
Pat McAfee: What a *****!
Michael Cole: He’s turning his attention back to Rey Mysterio… and he connects with a manoeuvre he calls the 2008! 1… 2… 3. It’s over.
Pat McAfee: The boos from the Sioux Falls crowd are well-deserved. He should never have won that match but Carlito’s sneak attack made the difference. Disgusting!
Winner by pinfall: Richard Holliday in 8:50 | 62
THE NEW HEAD OF THE TABLE
Michael Cole: I’m sure this isn’t the last time these two face each other in the ring. Switching gear, last Saturday at Bad Blood, Jimmy Uso won the Bloodline triple threat match – with a little help from the returning Trinity Fatu – to become the new head of the table.
Pat McAfee: He won both the beat the clock challenge set up to choose the stipulation and the match at Bad Blood so you could argue that he’s on a roll but the manner of that win leaves a lot to be desired.
Melissa Santos: Ladies and gentlemen... please, welcome… The Bloodline!
Michael Cole: Judging by their expression, Jey and Solo aren’t happy at all with that result but the Bloodline will have to cut off the internal squabbling if they are to regain their status on SmackDown. Whether Jimmy has the charisma to keep everyone’s ambitions in line is another matter.
Jimmy Uso: The Bloodline is now in your city! Yo, Uce, I’m just kidding! I’m in a good mood, you see, Uce. Yessir. At Bad Blood, we gave each other a real fight. We fought like brothers do. Everything went and at the end of the night, I was crowned the new tribal chief, thanks to my beautiful wife. But, hey Uce, I want you to know that I respect the both of you and I don’t intend to rule this family the way Roman did.
Jey Uso: About that, Uce…
Jimmy Uso: Yeah, Uce? Got something on your mind?
Jey Uso: I do. See, it’s not the fact that you cheated your way to victory… you’ve always been like that.
Jimmy Uso: Heh, you can’t blame a guy for trying, Uce.
Jey Uso: Nossir. You had Trinity as you ace in the sleeve but ok, that’s fair. We knew the deal when we stepped in the ring. No, the problem, Uce, is that we talked about it with Solo and… we think you’re not fit to represent our family.
Jimmy Uso: Ha! Good one, Uce! You almost got me here.
Jey Uso: I’m not kidding, Uce. You got arrested multiple times and we were nice saying you like to party but the truth is, Uce, you’re a drunk.
Jimmy Uso: Hey, Uce, what’s your game? You’re bringing that sh** up in front of everyone, in front of my wife on the day I take over from our cousin? What’s your problem? You want me to teach you another lesson, like I did on Saturday?
Jey Uso: Look, Uce, don’t take this the hard way but this tribal chief gig comes with a lot of pressure. You just don’t…
Michael Cole: What’s that music…?
Pat McAfee: It’s… it’s Jacob Fatu! The ‘other’ cousin! What’s he doing here?
Jacob Fatu: Ha! Come on, Jey! You’re trying to paint Jimmy as a criminal now? He’s an angel! Aren’t you momma’s good little boy, Jimmy?
Jimmy Uso: Hey, Uce, don’t take this wrong but… don’t you have some hardcore match that will be shown on YouTube? Jacob Fatu: What? You’re ashamed of your cousin, now? People, let me tell you this: these guys, Jimmy and Jey, they changed my life. They haven’t visited for a long time but I saw them on TV when I was doing hard times and I thought, ‘if they can make it, so can I’. And here I am.
Jey Uso: Yeah, Uce, great sob story but we’re in the middle of…
Jacob Fatu: You’re in the middle of nothing! You lost that match and now, you’re trying to sneak your way back into contention but this isn’t some little kiddies’ game, ‘Uce’.
Jimmy Uso: Well said, Uce.
Jacob Fatu: Yeah, but you’re not going to like what I have to say. Jey and Solo, they lost fair and square but; me, on the other hand? I never got the chance to fight for the control of that Bloodline of yours.
Jimmy Uso: Look, Uce…
Jacob Fatu: What? I’ve been clawing my way to the top for ten years now. You know who I am and yet you never called or even brought your ass to see me in the ring. Maybe that’s why you forgot to send me an invitation for that little match of yours. Never mind, I don’t hold grudges. You got two choices now: either you face me in the ring for your seat at the head of the table or you simply acknowledge me.
Jimmy Uso: Come on, Uce, we’ve got to talk about this…
Jacob Fatu: No. You’ve got to think about this. You know enough about me to know that I’m joking. I’ll be there next week.
Michael Cole: Oh, well… that wasn’t the kind of coronation Jimmy expected.
Pat McAfee: I can’t help but feel for the guy. His whole life, he’s been the ‘other Uso’. He finally got his big break and his thug of a cousin comes out of nowhere to steal his thunder.
Michael Cole: If he wants to keep his spot, Jimmy’s got a hell of a fight on his hands. Jacob Fatu is a ruthless competitor.
Pat McAfee: Yeah… I wouldn’t want to be in his shoes. | 67
REPEAT OFFENDER?
[Dominik Mysterio is in the treatment room, being checked for a possible concussion after being hit with a baseball bat earlier on, when Cody Rhodes comes in.]
Cody Rhodes: Hey, kid. I saw what happened and I wanted to check on you. How are you doing?
Dominik Mysterio: Ha, I’m fine, hombre. That sucker Woods hits like my little sister! When you’ve done some hard time, it’s nothing to be concerned about.
Cody Rhodes: I’m sure it isn’t but these blows to the head have to be taken seriously, you know. No dizziness or nausea?
Dominik Mysterio: LOL, what are you – a doctor, now? Don’t worry about me, amigo. I’m doing well.
Cody Rhodes: That’s good to hear. In that case, maybe you can help me with something. You see, the owner of the nightclub where I was attacked sent the security footage to the police but he also shared this video with me. You see the guy paying the thug who stabbed me? I think he looks like someone I know but I can’t quite put a name on him.
[Dom’s expression changes.]
Dominik Mysterio: Er… no, sorry. Doesn’t ring any bell.
Cody Rhodes: I’m asking because someone said this guy looks an awful lot like you.
Dominik Mysterio: That’s just a load of crap, hombre! You know the way it is: you talk about a crime and people go into autopilot. Of course, there’s a guy around with a criminal record, who bossed his cell block so, of course, it’s got to be him. Happens to me all the time. That’s the price of being a cult outlaw figure.
Cody Rhodes: Yes, I figured as much. That makes sense because it would a very dumb move to try and put me on the shelf.
Dominik Mysterio: Yeah, sure… Why would I do that?
Cody Rhodes: Exactly. Plus, if I found out it were you, I’d have to give you the beating of a lifetime and put you on the shelf for a very, very long time.
Dominik Mysterio: Yeah…
Cody Rhodes: Right. I’ve got a match coming up. Take care of yourself, kid. And watch your back.
[Rhodes leaves the treatment room as Dominik looks on with a worried look on his face.] | 66
ERIK vs CODY RHODES
 vs
Melissa Santos: The following contest is set for one fall. Introducing first, accompanied to the ring by Valkyrie… representing the Viking Raiders… from Cleveland, Ohio… weighing in at 247 pounds… Erik!
Michael Cole: After an unsuccessful challenge for the Universal Championship at Bad Blood, what’s next for Erik? He needs to reinvent himself and a win, tonight, against a returning Cody Rhodes could be a huge boost.
Pat McAfee: It’s not as crazy as it sounds. There will be some ring rust on Rhodes’ side and when you have a physique like Erik’s, all you need is an opening and your strength will do the rest.
Melissa Santos: And his opponent… making his way to the ring… from Atlanta, Georgia… weighing in at 222 pounds… He is ‘The American Nightmare’… Cody Rhodes!
Michael Cole: Cody Rhodes is set for in-ring action after nearly a month on the sidelines following that incident in a San Antonio nightclub. The look on his face tells you everything you need to know: he’s more determined than ever to finish the story.
Pat McAfee: He’s never been afraid to put his money where his mouth is. He’s proved himself all over the world but he still has to win one major championship here, in WWE. He’s been cheated out of dream at WrestleMania and it’s been eating him up on the inside. He’s put a tremendous amount of pressure on himself but that’s the way he likes it, I think.
Michael Cole: The referee rings the bell and it’s on. Erik and Cody are locking up in the middle of the ring but the Viking Raider shows off his power by pushing Rhodes away. Off the ropes goes Cody… Oh, my God! Did you see that? Erik sent him crashing outside with a back body drop like it was nothing at all!
Pat McAfee: Erik is a wounded bear at the moment. A master strategist he is not, even with Valkyrie at ringside, but he’s even more dangerous after what happened at Bad Blood.
Michael Cole: Erik and Valkyrie are working together to throw the American Nightmare back in the ring. There’s an urgency about Erik’s moves in the ring that maybe had been missing since Ivar got injured a few months ago. Oh, what a powerbomb! It’s fair to say that Cody Rhodes probably had something else in mind for his comeback. Erik follows up with a body slam… Cover… 1… and a kick out.
Pat McAfee: Cody wouldn’t be the first wrestler blinded by pride but it’s possible that he did come back too soon.
Michael Cole: Rhodes is trying to fight back with a right hand but Erik blocks it. He sends him for a ride… Erik misses wildly with a punch and Rhodes finally connects with a cloth… Oh-oh! He hit Erik at full speed with a clothesline and he couldn’t even stagger him!
Pat McAfee: Cody has got to be distracted by that whole stabbing saga. He clearly implied a few minutes ago that Dirty Dom was behind the attack. It’s got to be difficult to focus on a different opponent right now.
Michael Cole: Unfortunately, Erik won’t go easy on him, no matter what his predicament may be. Rhodes is sent running again… Oh! Wow! Erik hits the spot with a double running knee strike! Rhodes literally bounced off the ring post in the corner! And referee Jessika Carr is checking on him. This is not looking good. Pat McAfee: Being sent flying across a ring by a 250-pound rarely makes you look good, to be honest. What worries me is that Cody has been unable to muster any offense since the bell rang. He’s one of the most resilient superstars of this era, no question, but everybody has their limit.
Michael Cole: Erik is trying to pressure Jessika Carr into a favourable decision. Hey! Watch out! Oh, no!
Pat McAfee: I don’t believe it!
Michael Cole: Ladies and gentlemen, Cody Rhodes tried to take advantage of the situation to bounce back with a disaster kick but Erik saw him coming and he threw the referee in front of him. What a coward!
Pat McAfee: There was nothing Cody could have done to avoid hitting her but he’s devastated just the same. He’s calling for help which is very much to his credit but turning his back on Erik isn’t the safest thing to do.
Michael Cole: This is going to turn ugly… Valkyrie threw a steel chair at Erik… who whacks Cody from behind! What a revolting development! Rhodes was taken by surprise and he can’t defend himself as Erik is unloading on him in the middle of the ring.
Pat McAfee: He looks pretty pleased with himself.
Michael Cole: He didn’t need to do that! He can’t even get the win with the referee out of action but this might not work in Cody’s favour either. Erik is setting up the chair… Oh, come on! No! He’s going to break his neck! Somebody, do something!
Pat McAfee: He’s completely lost it!
Michael Cole: Hold on! Rhodes managed to get back up and he’s using the chair as a weapon to ram Erik into the corner! And the Viking Raider eats steel! Cody discards the chair, hops to the top rope… Cody Cutter! Cody Cutter on Erik! Can he get the win? The referee’s counting… 1… 2… 3… No! Valkyrie grab Erik’s foot and put it on the rope!
Pat McAfee: That was a close shave, even for a baldie!
Michael Cole: Both men are back on their feet but you can see that this intense contest has already taken a toll on them. They have to wonder how… Wait a minute! Small package! Erik is trying to steal a quick one! 1… 2… and another kick out!
Pat McAfee: This isn’t a random match for any of these superstars. They’re really willing to pull all the stops to get the win.
Michael Cole: Both men have come close to winning the big one in recent months and they must be desperate for another shot. Erik’s caught flat-footed with a kick across the face before he can get back to a vertical base, though, and he looks stunned. Cody is going for something spectacular… Holy cow! Piledriver! Cody Rhodes lifted a 250-pound man and planted him head first into the mat!
Pat McAfee: That’s got to be it!
Michael Cole: Cody drops on top of Erik… 1… 2… 3… Unbelievable! How did he kick out of that? Out of pure instinct, Erik managed to raise his shoulder at the very last second.
Pat McAfee: Cody can’t believe it either! Michael Cole: What does he have to do to finally put Erik away? That elusive victory keeps escaping him and… Oh, what now? What is Valkyrie doing on the apron?
Pat McAfee: I don’t know what their plan is but that spells trouble for Cody!
Michael Cole: And Erik takes advantage of the situation with a double axe handle from behind. Just when you think this is over, the Raiders turn it around. They’re not going to…?
Pat McAfee: I think they are! Valkyrie is going to deputise for Ivar! It’s the Viking Experience!
Michael Cole: Erik is throwing Cody forward… Valkyrie lifts him in the air… CrossRhodes! Cody hits the CrossRhodes on Valkyrie before Erik could catch him! Superkick! But Erik won’t go down… CrossRhodes! What a flurry! Cody puts his arm across Erik’s shoulders… 1… 2… 3! He’s done it!
Pat McAfee: Cody Rhodes comes out on top in this war of attrition!
Michael Cole: What a battle! Erik gave it everything he got but, in the end, he couldn’t prevent the American Nightmare from making a winning return to SmackDown! I’m sure Cody could have wished for an easier match but this victory will taste all the sweeter after all the challenges he had to overcome!
Winner by pinfall: Cody Rhodes in 10:11 | 69
CAREER OPPORTUNITIES
 
[Backstage, Carmella is walking around purposefully, obviously looking for someone, when she happens onto Sonya Deville.]
Carmella: Ah, Sonya! Just the woman I was looking for!
Sonya Deville: What can I help you with?
Carmella: Actually, it’s me who can help you with something. I come with a once-in-a-lifetime offer: would you like to be my tag-team partner? Together, we could win the tag team titles!
Sonya Deville: I thought you were teaming up with Lacey?
Carmella: Yeah, well… let’s just say that the Marines’ training ain’t what it used to be. Think about it. You had that long feud with Mandy – that didn’t make you look very good, by the way –, then you became an assistant GM…
Sonya Deville: I was co-GM, actually.
Carmella: Same difference. And then, what? You were out of the picture. You’ve been jobbing a couple of times but nobody cares out you.
Sonya Deville: You haven’t exactly set the world on fire, either.
Carmella: I’m being punished for my looks! They know the other girls look bad next to me that’s why I’m looking for a partner that has no… I mean, a partner who doesn’t… a badass partner. You’re not about the looks, Sonya! You’re a former MMA fighter! But you are correct: I’ve been shadow banned! Can you imagine that they got ME fighting on pre-shows against girls whose names I don’t even know?
Sonya Deville: Fighting… and losing.
Carmella: Who cares about that? They’re not keeping a record anyway. The point is, these belts are out tickets back to where we belong and that is at the top of the Women’s division.
Sonya Deville: Alright… [her phone starts ringing.] Excuse me, please… Yes, it’s me… Yeah… Sure… That’s tempting but… Ok, I’ll be in touch. [turning to Carmella.] Alright, let me think about it and I’ll tell you as soon as I’ve made up my mind.
Carmella: Don’t miss that train!
[Carmella watches her walk away, a suspicious look on her face.] | 56
ANOTHER MUGGING
[Cody Rhodes is ready to leave the arena after his match. He walks by Carmella and the camera follows him to the parking lot, where Dominik Mysterio is waiting for him.]
Dominik Mysterio: Hey, hombre, congratulations! I didn’t think you had that win in you! You know, I’ve been thinking about what you told me earlier and it gave me an idea…
[Luke Gallows comes from behind and smashes Rhodes’ head against a nearby car.]
Dominik Mysterio: … if you want to get something done, you’ve got to do it yourself!
[Gallows and Mysterio start unloading on Rhodes, beating him up with his own suitcase. You can hear cries in the background but before the cavalry arrives, Rhodes is put through a Gallows Pole from the top of the car before Dominik superkicks him through the side window. As soon as the officials run in, they run away. People are calling for paramedics as Rhodes lay on the floor, his face a bloody mess.] | 72
NEW CHALLENGERS
 
Melissa Santos: Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome… Cora Jade and Piper Niven!
Michael Cole: Two female competitors coming over from RAW can only spell trouble for Liv Morgan and Raquel Rodriguez. However, Pat, we can’t ignore what just happened in front of our cameras moments ago. Just… What kind of a lowlife is Dominik Mysterio?
Pat McAfee: I can’t really disagree. He pretty much admitted he was behind Cody’s stabbing over a month ago and still, he had the audacity to ambush him in the parking lot.
Michael Cole: Cody Rhodes has been taken to a local medical facility and we all wish him a very speedy recovery but regardless of what happens next, Dominik Mysterio is a piece of trash. It has to be said. I feel sorry for his dad, Rey, but at the end of the day, his son is just a sad excuse for a human being.
Pat McAfee: Someone has to stop him. Ever since he joined the Judgement Day, he’s been completely out of control. I think deep down, Dom’s a coward. He wouldn’t do half the things he does if he didn’t have a gang to back him up.
Michael Cole: Adam Pearce has to take action and hopefully, he will do so sooner rather than later.
Piper Niven: There’s no need to beat around the bush. We’re here for one reason and that is to challenge for the Women’s Tag Team Championship. So, let’s get this over with. Come out, come out, wherever you are.
[Liv Morgan and Raquel Rodriguez make their way down the ramp as their music hits.]
 
Liv Morgan: Wow! That was a heartfelt challenge if I ever heard one. Did someone force you to do that? Because it certainly looks that way. Where’s your passion, lass?
Piper Niven: You think you’re so clever, eh? You want to talk? Ok, let’s talk. I’ve been in this business for nearly twenty years. I’ve wrestled everywhere and everybody. Do I dream of these belts every night? No. I haven’t lost a single match in three months. I’m better than most women on this roster and yet, do I get a title shot? No, I don’t. So, when that kid…
Cora Jade: Hey!
Piper Niven: Sorry, kid. When that kid came up to me said she wanted a shot at your titles, I thought: ‘why not’. It can’t be worse than rotting on the sidelines. But five minutes into this gig and I’m already having doubts.
Liv Morgan: Did you hear that, Raquel? We’ve got Piper Niven and… the kid to deal with.
Cora Jade: Hey! I’m not a kid!
Liv Morgan, Raquel Rodriguez, Piper Niven: Shut up!
Liv Morgan: Think we can find some time for them next week?
Raquel Rodriguez: It suits me. But let me say something, first. It takes a lot of hard work to form a successful tag team. Liv and I, we spent months training and fine-tuning our duo, until we managed to beat two of the best in the business. A make-up team like yours stand no chance.
Piper Niven: Fine. I’ll do it on my own. I don’t plan on using the kid anyway.
Cora Jade: Hey! | 70
COMING UP
Michael Cole: Well Pat, the stage is set for a massive Women’s Tag Team Championship match, next week on SmackDown. Can Piper Niven and Cora Jade bring the belts back on RAW or will Liv Morgan and Raquel Rodriguez hold onto the titles?
Pat McAfee: Niven and Cora Jade have never wrestled together as far as I know. It would be a huge surprise but they say anything can happen here in the WWE…
Michael Cole: Also, next week, the Judgement Day and the New Day will get the chance to settle their differences inside the ring. Damian Priest and Karrion Kross will face Kofi Kingston and Xavier Woods in what promises to be a very emotional match.
Pat McAfee: Woods and Kingston will be keen to avenge their fallen brother Big E but the Judgement Day have been decimating everything in their path since Scarlett and Kross joined them. This one is almost guaranteed to spill out of the ring.
Michael Cole: Carlito will also be in action against Elias. His association with Richard Holliday has proved to be a successful one so far but WWE’s resident drifter is warned. Will that be enough to avoid Rey Mysterio’s fate?
Pat McAfee: They say forewarned is forearmed! These two need to eat a good slice of humble pie and Elias is just the right man to administer the cure, in my opinion! | 67
DREW MCINTYRE vs GUNTHER (UNIVERSAL CHAMPIONSHIP)
 vs 
Melissa Santos: Ladies and gentlemen… the following contest is set for one fall and it is for the Universal Championship! Introducing first, the challenger… from Ayr, Scotland… weighing in at 275 pounds… He is ‘The Scottish Terminator’… Drew McIntyre!
Michael Cole: We’re treated to an impromptu second title match tonight as the relationship between the Universal champion and the SmackDown General Manager continues to spiral out of control. If Gunther’s reign was in danger last Saturday at Bad Blood, he faces a very different challenge tonight.
Pat McAfee: Ever since that little ‘pep talk’ with Stone Cold Steve Austin, McIntyre has been absolutely ruthless. He’s taken out Logan Paul and despite being plagued by a mysterious masked attacker, he finds himself in another title match tonight.
Ludwig Kaiser: Ladies and gentlemen… I demand your full attention. Allow me to introduce the man who is the epitome of efficiency and elegance. Stand up and show the proper respect for your Universal champion… de Ring General… Gunther!
Michael Cole: Say whatever you want about Gunther but he’s never been afraid to put his titles on the line and it can’t be argued that he’s got one of the most stellar records in WWE in 2023.
Pat McAfee: He will forever remain the man who took the Universal belt off Roman Reigns. Make no mistake about it, Gunther is as clever as he is a ruthless. McIntyre has never pinned him and despite the hardships of Bad Blood, the Imperium is here in full force tonight.
Michael Cole: The ring goes off and here we go. McIntyre, not wasting anytime, charges on and both men are locked up in the middle of the ring. It’s a test of strength and Gunther’s coming out on top as he sends his opponent crashing hard, back first into the corner.
Pat McAfee: Gunther will try to slow the pace down by hitting one power move after the other. McIntyre will have to find a way to push him over his limit, but that’s easier said than done.
Michael Cole: That certainly cut the wind off McIntyre’s sails early. Gunther’s picking him up… he’s going for the Last Symphony already! But McIntyre struggles out of it… Oh! And he hits back with a vicious clothesline, sending the champion on the floor.
Pat McAfee: These two behemoths are going to do a lot of damage and it could come down to whoever is the most resilient.
Michael Cole: I’d be surprised if Kaiser and Vinci didn’t become a factor at some point in this match. But for now, McIntyre is in control. He’s pushing Gunther against the ropes, trying to cut off his breath but referee Jason Ayers quickly reaches the count of five. Gunther replies with a back elbow. McIntyre is stunned.
Pat McAfee: The two of them were part of an epic triple threat match for the Intercontinental Championship, along with Sheamus, at WrestleMania.
Michael Cole: It’s a match that spelled the end of the friendship between McIntyre and Sheamus. Meanwhile, Gunther sends McIntyre down with a big foot straight to the mush and he hits a series of big stomps.
Pat McAfee: That’s Gunther for you. Nothing fancy here, no flip-flops just hard-hitting moves that inflict as much damage as possible.
Michael Cole: He’s going for one last strike… but McIntyre rolls out of the way. No matter, Gunther won’t give him any space… he’s already back on the attack and… sleeper hold! Sleeper hold locked in!
Pat McAfee: Gunther’s massive frame is enough to take down most competitors. Imagine having that kind of weight dragging you down while every breath is a struggle!
Michael Cole: McIntyre is thrashing about but there’s no way he can make it to the ropes. He’s trying to shake off Gunther but the hold is expertly applied… He’s fading away! Look at his eyes! He’s about to lose consciousness… No! Somehow, he managed to hit Gunther across the side of the head with an elbow!
Pat McAfee: Gunther didn’t see it coming. He’s rocked!
Michael Cole: Gunther is staggering to the corner. He’s in dire straits. McIntyre is taking a few steps back… We said earlier that his match could be decided on a mistake or a moment of a brilliance… this could be it. McIntyre is ready to end this… Claymore kick! Oh, my God! Nobody home!
Pat McAfee: Did you see that? He almost took out the ring post!
Michael Cole: Gunther moved out of the way at the last second and McIntyre’s momentum did the rest. Just when it looked like the Ring General’s reign was in jeopardy, one quick sidestep was all it took to completely turn the match on its head. And now, it’s McIntyre’s turn to fight for survival in this match. Oh! What a powerbomb! Gunther’s going to retain… 1… 2… 3… No! McIntyre had the wherewithal to grab the rope at the very last second. This match continues!
Pat McAfee: I’m afraid he only made it harder on himself. He’s got a mountain to climb now and once Gunther smells the blood, he’s almost impossible to stop.
Michael Cole: Gunther, now taunting the crowd. It says a lot about how confident he must feel when you know that Drew McIntyre can turn a match on its head in a matter of second. Gunther is going for another powerbomb… but McIntyre counters! DDT!
Pat McAfee: Consciously or not, Drew’s been targeting Gunther’s head since the beginning of the match. This could be the key.
Michael Cole: Meanwhile at ringside, Kaiser and Vinci are feeling the pressure. They know the title is in jeopardy, perhaps now more than ever since Gunther ended Roman Reigns’ historic run at SummerSlam. McIntyre is trying to shake the cobwebs… he picks up Gunther, who hits back with an elbow to the gut!
Pat McAfee: This one has been going back and forth for a while now and neither Gunther nor McIntyre has managed to take the upper hand for longer than a few seconds.
Michael Cole: That’s how balanced this title match has been so far but this could change any moment. Look at Gunther’s face. He’s done playing. Oh, my God! Did you hear that? What a chop! Gunther is using his massive paws like battering rams and McIntyre has no choice but to step back.
Pat McAfee: His chest is turning red!
Michael Cole: And Gunther finishes that strong sequence with a massive clothesline, sending McIntyre crashing onto the mat. This might be the last strow that broke the camel’s back and Gunther’s feeling it! He’s ready to end this! Last Symphony… Are you kidding me? McIntyre stunned him with a Glasgow Kiss just as he was about to hit his finisher!
Pat McAfee: There was a price to pay, though. Drew’s busted open!
Michael Cole: Still, he stays in this match. Gunther doesn’t know where he is. Can McIntyre capitalise? He’s heading upstairs…
Pat McAfee: It’s a huge risk! McIntyre isn’t exactly the high-flying type…
Michael Cole: Desperate times call for desperate measures! Kaiser and Vinci are slowing him down but he manages to push them away… McIntyre soars… Unbelievable! Gunther caught him in mid-air and sent him flying with a released German suplex! He threw a nearly 300-pounder like a ragdoll! Is there any way to beat this man?
Pat McAfee: He used McIntyre’s momentum against him but it still takes a tremendous amount of coordination and power to do what he just did! That has got to be it!
Michael Cole: Gunther hooks the leg… 1… 2… 3… No! How did he do that? Somehow, someway, McIntyre managed to raise his shoulder in the nick of time! And look at the frustration on Gunther’s face! He didn’t expect him to kick out.
Pat McAfee: He’s come close on a couple of occasions now. He’s got to ask himself if this won’t come back to bite him in the ass.
Michael Cole: Cover again! 1… 2… McIntyre kicks out! Gunther is absolutely furious now… he’s having a tantrum in the middle of the ring. He’s completely losing it. He goes for the cover for a third time… but McIntyre was ready this time! Small package! Is he going to steal the win? No, Gunther kicks out easily but… Holy! McIntyre with a snap piledriver!
Pat McAfee: He just planted Gunther in the ring out of nowhere!
Michael Cole: Kaiser and Vinci can’t believe it! They’re… My God! Future Shock DDT! Gunther crashes on his head once again! He’s not moving at all! He’s at McIntyre’s mercy!
Pat McAfee: It’s all over!
Michael Cole: McIntyre is looking over his shoulder. What does he have in mind? He’s coming off the ropes… Tope con hilo! He just took out Kaiser and Vinci in one swift move! There’s nobody left to save Gunther this time!
Pat McAfee: McIntyre showed some incredible ring awareness here! They would have stopped the count if he had covered Gunther. The title is there for the taking!
Michael Cole: McIntyre rushes back inside the ring! The Milwaukee crowd are on their feet! Gunther still hasn’t moved an inch! We’ve got a new champ! He hooks the inside leg… 1… 2… 3… No! What the… It’s the guy with the ski mask punting McIntyre in the head!
Pat McAfee: My God! McIntyre is going to go ballistic… when he wakes up. That guy cleaned his clock!
Michael Cole: The referee has no choice but to call for the bell. The mysterious attacker is already running away but the damage is done. Four men down in and around the ring but at the end of the night, Gunther remains the Universal champion. Adam Pearce came close to solving his ‘problem’ but he’s only got one bullet left now. What’s next for Drew McIntyre and who will face Gunther next? Be there next week to find out!
Winner by disqualification: Drew McIntyre in 13:07 | 81
However, still WWE Universal champion Gunther
Show rating: 79
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Post by mistersocko on Sept 22, 2024 22:50:01 GMT 1
(if you thought I'd never post again, so did I at some point. For some reason, my boss decided to make a heel turn while I was on vacation. I suppose I should be happy he didn't take a leaf of Vince's book and decided I should kiss his ass literally but, instead, he decided I had to earn my wages. Fortunately, he's forgotten about me again so I'm back to typing nonsense! It will probably take me a couple of shows to really pick up where I left off but shit happens, I guess...)
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Post by mistersocko on Oct 10, 2024 22:59:51 GMT 1
Monday, September Wk3, 2023
From El Paso, TX
RANALLO AND BARRETT WELCOME
 
Mauro Ranallo: Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to Monday Night RAW! We come to you, live, from El Paso, Texas, less than 20 days away from Extreme Rules and by the look of it, some might not make it to our next Premium Live Event, Wade.
Wade Barrett: Last week on RAW, Lance Archer dismantled your boy, Chad Gable. He looks absolutely unstoppable at the moment but… Austin Theory, the self-styled King of Hardcore, has challenged him to an inferno match, tonight!
Mauro Ranallo: The match was set up last week on social media but WWE officials have refused to book. It will be an unsanctioned contest.
Wade Barrett: Archer put Trish Stratus, Theory’s… mentor, through a ladder. He’s got to get some sort of payback or he can kiss his credibility goodbye. Unfortunately for him, Archer is a monster straight out of a Hollywood movie. He will have to go beyond hardcore if he wants to put his opponent on fire and win this match.
Mauro Ranallo: On a different note, Roman Reigns will have to defend his WWE title at Extreme Rules despite a serious foot injury sustained at the hands of the Fiend during Bad Blood. And the challenger is none other than Seth Freakin Rollins.
Wade Barrett: How he got that title shot, one week after a losing effort against Prince Puma for the United States Championship is beyond me. The fact that they have some history together doesn’t make him worthy. There were plenty of better options out there!
Mauro Ranallo: Would you care to share a name?
Wade Barrett: Well, LA Knight, of course! Here’s a superb athlete, who would make a great champion.
Mauro Ranallo: Randy Orton will also be in action, against Dolph Ziggler. Orton needs a win to bounce back after suffering an unexpected defeat against his former tag-team partner, Matt Riddle, at Bad Blood.
Wade Barrett: I’m sure we will also hear Riddle whining about his girlfriend.
Mauro Ranallo: Please, Wade, this is a very serious situation. Matt Riddle’s girlfriend has been missing for a week now and, hopefully, the Original Bro will come bearing good news tonight.
Wade Barrett: He needs to grow up a little. His old lady has been missing, so what? She’s probably enjoying herself far away from that dump he calls home or she realised all that smoke was doing her future baby any good.
Mauro Ranallo: You’re impossible, Wade. All this and more, tonight on Monday Night RAW! But right now, let’s hear from the United States champion. | 57
KONNAN HAS A MESSAGE
 
Samantha Irvin: Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome… the United States champion, Prince Puma, and his manager, the legendary Konnan!
Wade Barrett: I never cared much for Puma but I lost all respect for him when he accepted Konnan’s apology for faking his absence at Bad Blood.
Mauro Ranallo: Prince Puma still came out on top of a very tough match against Seth Freakin Rollins. That certainly makes it easier to forgive. But Konnan claims he’s got great plans for his protégé.
Konnan: Let me tell you something, a story if you will. Ten years ago, I was in Boyle Heights, minding my own business when I found a very special boy. He had something very few people in this business have in there [He points at his head.]. I took it upon myself to train him. I was with you every step of the way, wasn’t I, mi hijo? But at the end of every journey comes a trial and he had to face his final test alone. Yeah, you can boo me all you want but who cares about your opinion? This kid and I, we’ve been through thick and thin and now, he’s ready. He’s the living embodiment of the puma, the ruler of the Kay Pacha. We’re ready to prove it and that’s why we’re issuing an open challenge for this belt, this gold. If someone thinks they can beat my Puma, let them come.
Mauro Ranallo: Wow. Strong words from Konnan and you have to wonder…
[MMM’s music hits. R-Truth and Otis come out.]
 
Wade Barrett: Looks like someone answered the call.
R-Truth: Hey! Hold on, hold on, hold on. Your story’s cool, man, but I know Conan and you’re not him. You don’t even have a sword. So, before we commit to anything, answer me this: is your pal really the United States champion?
Konnan: What kind of a stupid question is that? Can’t you see the belt?
R-Truth: I swear I saw a kid with the same belt on the way here! It doesn’t prove anything! Alright, let me ask you a question that only a true United States champion would know the answer to.
Konnan: You’re an idiot!
R-Truth: Alright, that’s a valid answer but next time, wait until I finish the question, please. So, is your friend going to fight my friend? That’s how it works when you’re a manager, isn’t it? My friend’s bigger than yours and all that.
Konnan: Homie, I used to respect you but you’ve turned into a burro.
R-Truth: I don’t speak Italian so there’s no need for that! I’ll just stick to the corner and watch Otis bring the title to MMM. Oh, one last question! What’s a Puma?
Wade Barrett: That moron has completely ruined the moment. | 72
OTIS vs PRINCE PUMA (UNITED STATES CHAMPIONSHIP)
vs
Mauro Ranallo: It looks like this match needs no further introduction then. Prince Puma defends his United States title against Otis and the least you can say is that Konnan is looking extremely confident.
Wade Barrett: And wrongfully so. Otis is a powerhouse that has been on the verge of winning a major title for quite some time now. If he thinks a win is in the bag, he’s even more deluded than I thought.
Mauro Ranallo: I can’t argue with you here but the fact remains that Prince Puma has claimed some impressive victories over the past couple of months. Referee John Cone is getting ready for action… and here we go! And right from the start, Puma connects with a standing dropkick straight in the face of Otis. Once again, the United States champion is showing off his cat-like agility!
Wade Barrett: Good for him but that didn’t rock Otis. He’s still standing, ready to strike back.
Mauro Ranallo: This match is going to revisit the old immovable object versus the unstoppable force parable! As you mentioned, Wade, Otis looks unaffected by Prince Puma’s strikes but he can’t put his hands on him either. It’s been all Puma so far and Konnan is having a ball at ringside.
Wade Barrett: Good for him but this one is far from over. Otis is the enforcer, the strong guy of MMM and when he does land a strike, it could be game over for the US champion.
Mauro Ranallo: Prince Puma connects with a series of middle and low kicks but no reaction from the challenger so far. He’s trying something different this time… a kick to the gut… front headlock… he’s going for the DDT! Oh, my God! Did you see that! Otis countered with a back body drop and sent him flying over the top rope! Puma crashed down hard!
Wade Barrett: Your mate Konnan isn’t having as much fun now, is he?
Mauro Ranallo: I resent the idea that I’d be partial in my commentary but if you’re implying the champion is in a precarious situation, I can only agree with you. Otis is rolling out of the ring and obviously has bad intentions… He’s going to… Oh, no! He’s grabbing a chair! What the… He’s completely lost it! Otis just threw a steel chair at Puma who managed to leap out of the way at the last moment!
Wade Barrett: That’s what you need if you want to make it in this business – total disregard for your opponent’s safety or well-being. Otis has all the tools to squash pretty much everyone on RAW. He just has to unleash his inner demon!
Mauro Ranallo: That was a very dangerous and stupid move! He almost got himself disqualified. Puma’s not wasting any second though. He’s hoping onto the apron… Shooting star press! Otis didn’t move!
Wade Barrett: Look at that! He’s going to kick a man down! Revolting!
Mauro Ranallo: Puma does have a mean streak in him. But Otis blocks the kick and… Holy cow! Otis got back on his feet and threw Prince Puma against the steel steps! What a display of raw power! And Puma looks to be out of it. His only saving grace is that this happened at ringside or we might be crowning a new champion.
Wade Barrett: Make no mistake, Mauro Ranallo, this bout is only going to end one way. Look at Otis and R-Truth conferring together. I never thought I’d say that but I think something good might come out of this impromptu pow-wow.
Mauro Ranallo: Something sinister, more like. Otis is picking up the chair he threw at Puma earlier on and… Oh, no! He’s wrapping it around Puma’s ankle! He’s going to break his leg!
Wade Barrett: It’s a tad on the extreme side but it’s a clever move. If you take out Puma’s ability to leap around, all that’s left is a geek in a stupid mask. This is a game-changer.
Mauro Ranallo: Konnan is trying to convince the referee to stop the match but the damage is done… or it soon will be. Otis is stomping away at the steel chair and did you see the sadistic look on his face while he was doing his grim work? He seems to be enjoying himself a little too much there.
Wade Barrett: Otis is the definition of domination. When you wield that kind of power, there’s no point in pretending to be a nice guy. You do what you want, you take what you want. Unfortunately for Puma, this 300-pound beast wants the United States Championship.
Mauro Ranallo: Prince Puma is hanging by a thread at the moment and I can’t really see that changing any time soon, unfortunately… Fireman’s carry… Oh, come on! Otis just threw Prince Puma like a javelin against the steel post! This is a human being for God’s sake! Oh! Oh, no! Again! And again! This is… this is uncomfortable to watch now. And Otis closes that gory sequence with a Samoan drop, squashing Prince Puma against the hard concrete.
Wade Barrett: I don’t want to kick a man down but eventually, you come across someone so much stronger than you are that it’s not even a match and that’s what Prince Puma is experiencing tonight. Otis was always that force of nature but it took a ruthless man like John Morrison to fulfil that potential. Otis used to look like he was ready to apologize for being so strong. Now, he’s the real monster he was always meant to be.
Mauro Ranallo: I wonder if we have R-Truth to thank for that. Puma has yet to make a move since that onslaught but Konnan is getting into Otis’ face, probably hoping to buy the champion a few precious seconds. Are you kidding me? Otis just shoved the Mexican legend to the ground. What a shocking lack of respect for one of the most talented wrestlers of his generation!
Wade Barrett: Serves him well for sticking his nose where it doesn’t belong. Otis has a title to win and throwing Puma’s carcass inside the ring takes him one step closer to his inevitable triumph.
Mauro Ranallo: That’s got to be it. Otis hooks the leg… 1… 2… 3… No! Prince Puma kicked out! That was pure instinct Puma’s part and Otis looks just as stunned as the rest of this El Paso crowd!
Wade Barrett: It doesn’t matter. With his crushed ankle, he’s a lame duck. Otis will finish him off.
Mauro Ranallo: You seem to be correct. Otis is climbing to the top turnbuckle… He’s going for the splash… Hey! Look out! Konnan sneaked in and pushed Otis just as he was about to jump! He crashed down hard in the middle of the ring!
Wade Barrett: R-Truth is not only and idiot, he’s useless too! What was he doing? He should have stopped him!
Mauro Ranallo: Apparently, he’s… posting on social media. Never mind, let’s focus on the action inside the ring. Prince Puma wraps his arm around Otis’ shoulders… 1… 2… Otis survives! Konnan’s interference almost cost him the title! Both men are trying to get back up but Puma can’t put any weight on his ankle at the moment, making him an easy target for his opponent.
Wade Barrett: The only reason not to disqualify that old rascal is because it would give him what he wants and that is an easy way out of a predicament he created for himself. This man is an absolute disgrace and I hope Puma gets rid of that flea, once he’s back at the bottom of the food chain!
Mauro Ranallo: Strong words from my… Recoil! Recoil! Otis was a little too slow to shake the cobwebs and Prince Puma took advantage of the situation with a Recoil out of nowhere! Otis went down like a ton of bricks!
Wade Barrett: No! Not like that!
Mauro Ranallo: Prince Puma is considering the situation… He’s going for the top turnbuckle! Can he capitalise on that moment of brilliance, despite the lame leg? R-Truth is rushing in to aid his stablemate… but Konnan cleans his clock with a shot of his cane straight across the face!
Wade Barrett: He’s a bloody thug, that’s what he is!
Mauro Ranallo: Prince Puma is looking down on his prey… Can he…? 630! The 630 connects! Cover! 1… 2… 3! Prince Puma retains the United States Championship but that was a close shave!
Wade Barrett: Are you kidding me! It’s a robbery! Otis was the better man for 99 percent of this matchup! Konnan turned this title match into an utter joke! What an outrageous ending!
Mauro Ranallo: He did have a hand in this match but I think it would unfair not to commend Prince Puma for his resilience and tenacity. Even with a crushed ankle, he kept on fighting until he could snatch the victory from the jaws of defeat. Congratulations to the United States champion, who lives on to fight another day!
Winner by pinfall and still United States champion: Prince Puma in 11:50 | 74
BACK TO THE PIT
 
Mauro Ranallo: Moving on, last week on RAW, our broadcast colleague Cathy Kelley took it upon herself to figure out what happened to Bray Wyatt during the few years he spent away from WWE. Her investigation led her to the Danvers Lunatic Asylum in Massachusetts and her first expedition turned out to be quite… eventful.
Wade Barrett: This place gives me the creeps from miles away. Whatever happened up there should stay buried. Cathy Kelley is a good journalist but she’s chasing ghosts – literally. Nobody’s seen or heard from the Fiend since Finn Balor and his flunkies put him inside that casket.
Mauro Ranallo: It’s a bit late to convince her to stop though, don’t you think. Anyway, we received some new footage just before we went on the air tonight. Let’s have a look.
[Cathy Kelley and The Undertaker are back in front of the asylum. The weather is as grim as last week. Kelley hasn’t improved one bit on handling a digital camera.]
Cathy Kelley: How does this… alright. Alright. Well, for starters, I’m alright as you can see. I don’t really know what happened last week. There was a lot of tension, that place was deserted and… I think I lost my nerves. It cost me a digital camera but that’s ok. That’s on me. So, we’re back to try and understand what happened here, a few years ago. First, let me ask you a question, Sir. What was that?
The Undertaker: Many of the souls who visited this place are restless. Their tormentor still resides here.
Cathy Kelley: Ok… that’s not helping at all.
The Undertaker: They can’t be helped. They need to be saved. Only two kinds of people have a part to play in this story: the gifted and the damned.
Cathy Kelley: Let’s get inside. We’re doing this in the morning, it should be safer. Strange… I don’t think the lobby looked that way last time we were here.
The Undertaker: This place is different. Think of it as a threshold.
Cathy Kelley: You mean, like a rabbit hole?
The Undertaker: What happened here needs to be chronicled and these events will find their way to you.
Cathy Kelly: Alright, let’s have a look… there’s got to be a blueprint somewhere. Ah, I think I’ve got it. They’ve set up an archive. I think that’s where we should start our investigation.
The Undertaker: In that case, let us make way.
[Kelley and The Undertaker walk towards the next corridor. The wooden floor creaks with each step but some daylight still make its way through the dusty windows, giving the place an eerie feel. Kelley turns around sharply as she hears a noise behind her. The camera moves frantically but we almost catch sight of a pair of red eyes in the darkest corner of the room. She stays still for a moment before turning around again.]
Cathy Kelley: Let’s go. | 75
THE CHALLENGERS ARE CHALLENGED
 
Mauro Ranallo: I… I don’t know what to say.
Samantha Irvin: Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome… Asuka and Sarray!
Wade Barrett: These two ladies are a sight for sore eyes! It’s a nice change of pace from all this doom and gloom. What’s more refreshing than seeing a master of her craft and her student in action?
Asuka: Watashi wa Piper Niven to wakai onnanoko ga SmackDown Women’s Tag Team chanpion ni chōsen suru no o mimashita. Karera wa kachi ga nai. Korera no shōgō wa Black Lotus no monodeari, moshi karera ni sukoshi demo ryōshiki ga areba, yorokonde shirizokuda rō. Watashi-tachi no sugureta resuringu gijutsu ni keii o arawashite, karera ni ima koso watashi-tachi ni hirefusu yō yōkyū shimasu!
Sarray: My sensei says that she saw Piper Niven and the young girl challenge the Women’s Tag Team champions on SmackDown. She also says that they are not worthy. These titles belong to the Black Lotus and if they had a hint of decency, they would step aside willingly. She demands that they bow down to us, now, out of respect for our superior wrestling skills.
Mauro Ranallo: I’m not sure asking nicely will be enough.
Wade Barrett: She’s not asking, she’s stating facts. We will soon find out anyway – here they come!
[Piper Niven and Cora Jade make their way to the ring.]
Piper Niven: So… you don’t believe in us either, do you?
Asuka: Īe. Anata wa watashi no taitoru ni chōsen shi, watashi wa kantan ni…
[Niven slaps the mic out of Asuka’s hand.]
Piper Niven: Cut the crap! I’ve been in Japan and I’ve beaten some of the top names there! I’m fed up of not being taken seriously because they saddled me with that dumb broad when I first came here. Truth is, I’m stronger than you.
Sarray: My sensei says that, unfortunately, you are not alone.
Cora Jade: Hey! What’s that supposed to mean? I’m a star, I’ll have you know! Never heard of the Generation of Jade?
Piper Niven: Shut up, Jade!
Asuka: Damare!
Sarray: My sensei says…
Cora Jade: Yeah, alright, I got the message, you stupid parrot. You know what? I don’t care what any of you think. You think you’re that good? Let’s have a fight! You beat us, you get our title shot. Sounds fair?
Piper Niven: What are you doing? That’s exactly what they want!
Sarray: My sensei says you’re on.
Cora Jade: Don’t worry, I’ve got this. I’ll show them that they grow them tough in Chicago and nobody will ever tell me to shut up ever again. | 58
CORA JADE AND PIPER NIVEN vs SARRAY AND ASUKA
Samantha Irvin: The following tag team match is set for one fall. Introducing first, from Chicago, Illinois… she is the leader of the ‘Generation of Jade’… Cora Jade! And her tag team partner, from Ayrshire, Scotland… Piper Niven!
Mauro Ranallo: It seems Cora Jade is tired of being considered Piper Niven’s sidekick. She’s taking matters into her own hands.
Wade Barrett: I say take her lightly at your own peril. Cora Jade may not be the most intimidating presence in the ring, but she’s a vicious competitor and a very dangerous individual.
Samantha Irvin: And their opponents, already in the ring. First, from Tokyo, Japan… Sarray. And her tag team partner, from Osaka, Japan… she is ‘The Empress of Tomorrow’… Asuka!
Mauro Ranallo: Asuka and Iyo Sky have said multiple times Japanese wrestling is superior to its American counterpart and they intend to prove it.
Wade Barrett: Asuka is a multi-time world champion in her own right and she’s taken Iyo Sky under her wing, so to speak. I haven’t seen much of this Sarray but if she’s half the woman her mentor is, she’s going to be a hell of a competitor.
Mauro Ranallo: We’ll see about that. Piper Niven and Asuka will get us started as the RAW Women’s champion Iyo Sky makes her way to the ring to support her stablemates. Asuka gets things underway with a right hand but Niven blocks her easily and hits the target with a punch of her own.
Wade Barrett: Niven is enjoying a considerable size advantage on her opponents but don’t bet against Asuka turning this around.
Mauro Ranallo: Niven sent Asuka reeling into the corner. Not the best place to be… Oh, wow! She just squashed the former Women’s champion with a spinning splash into the corner! Definitely not the start Asuka had in mind. Despite your enthusiastic take on Japanese wrestling, it has to be said that Iyo Sky’s reign has been somewhat unorthodox and she’s made some strong enemies along the way.
Wade Barrett: If you’re referring to Charlotte and Bailey, jealousy doesn’t suit them. They dominated the women’s scene for years but their time has come to an end and they can’t accept that. Ignoring them is probably the best we can do…
Mauro Ranallo: One person that can’t be ignored is Piper Niven as she cleans Asuka’s clock in the middle of the ring. She’s been relentless and… Ah, Cora Jade is tagging herself in. She goes to the ropes… Oh, what a nasty-looking kick to the back of the head by Sarray!
Wade Barrett: Looks like she’s out… It’s a two-on-one situation now in the middle of the ring.
Mauro Ranallo: Once again, our Japanese friends are stretching the rules. The referee should do something.
Wade Barrett: Oh, come on! Things like this are part of the tag team fun! Cora Jade should have known better!
Mauro Ranallo: Asuka and Sarray are pressing Niven with a barrage of kicks and punches! She’s on the ropes… Oh, did you see that? What an innovative move! Asuka when to the ropes and used the crouching Sarray as a springboard to hit Niven straight in the face with a picture-perfect dropkick! And with Niven tumbling over the top ropes, things are looking bleak now for Cora Jade.
Wade Barrett: She bit off more than she could chew when she put their challenge for the Women’s Tag Team Championship on the line.
Mauro Ranallo: Jade is getting back up… Oh, but not for long! Asuka caught her square across the jaw with that spin kick out of the nowhere and just like that, the Black Lotus are in control. Asuka is taking a moment to bask in her own glory it seems, before sending in her understudy. And Sarray immediately makes her presence felt with a snap suplex.
Wade Barrett: Asuka is nothing if not crafty. She’s moving to ringside to work on Niven before she can recover. That’s all the difference between a talented youngster and a seasoned veteran.
Mauro Ranallo: Asuka is picking up Niven… She’s going to send her against the steel steps… but Niven counters… and Asuka is blasted against the cold, hard stairs like a crash-test dummy! That was spectacular! She literally rebounded against the steel!
Wade Barrett: The referee should consider a disqualification, here.
Mauro Ranallo: On what basis?
Wade Barrett: It’s my expert opinion, that’s all! I don’t have a horse in the race so you should listen to my unbiased advice.
Mauro Ranallo: Alright… Niven is shaking the cobwebs and it looks like Sarray’s onslaught on Cora Jade could be over soon. Niven climbs back on the apron but… I don’t believe it! Asuka! Asuka is back and she’s going to… No, she can’t! She’s going to… Wow! She just powerbombed Piper Niven on the concrete floor!
Wade Barrett: That impact was heard around the world!
Mauro Ranallo: How did she do that? And it’s not over! She hits the target with a splash and… superkick! Niven’s out for good!
Wade Barrett: Asuka is one of the fastest competitors in the world. Once she picks up momentum, she makes up for her lack of stature with some high-impact moves as Piper Niven found out… again, I might add.
Mauro Ranallo: Knowing someone’s strengths and finding an effective defence are two different things. Asuka is already back to the apron as Cora Jade is sent for a ride… and she hits the target with an Enzuigiri to the back of the head. Sarray is ready to pounce of with a DDT… but Cora Jade is ramming her forward and both women fall outside.
Wade Barrett: She’s not going to like life outside the ring any better, I’m afraid.
Mauro Ranallo: Cora Jade is fighting like a Tasmanian devil out there! She’s coming out on top of Sarray and… what is she doing? Oh, my! She just hit Sarray straight in the head with the steel steps! She didn’t see it coming at all and the referee isn’t too happy with that move but Asuka is…
Wade Barrett: Look out!
 
Mauro Ranallo: Bailey and Charlotte are coming in and they’re attacking Asuka and Iyo Sky behind the referee’s back! This match has descended into utter chaos! There’re bodies everywhere! The referee is considering calling this match off but Charlotte and Bailey are moving away, leaving the RAW Women’s champion and her mentor on the floor.
Wade Barrett: Watch out! Cora Jade has grabbed her bat and she… What a disaster! She caught Sarray straight across the ribs.
Mauro Ranallo: Cora Jade is trying to take advantage of the confusion. She’s throwing Sarray back in the ring… She hooks the leg… 1… 2… 3! It’s over! In rather controversial fashion, Piper Niven and Cora Jade remain the number one contenders for the Women’s Tag Team championship.
Wade Barrett: It’s a daylight robbery, you mean! They were about to be wiped out when the most bitter women on planet Earth decided to turn the match on its head. These cowards couldn’t beat Asuka and Iyo Sky in the ring so they had to do this. Bah!
Winners by pinfall: Cora Jade and Piper Niven in 7:05 | 59
MIND GAMES
 
Samantha Irvin: Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome… the WWE champion Roman Reigns and his special counsel, Paul Heyman!
Mauro Ranallo: The match was set up last week by Stephanie McMahon herself – Roman Reigns will face his former Shield brother Seth Freakin Rollins at Extreme Rules.
Wade Barrett: This is an absolute travesty of justice! Look at his boot! He’s in no condition to compete! He’s being fed to the wolves because people want to see new faces. His only crime is being the best wrestler of this – or any other for that matter – generation.
Roman Reigns: El Paso, Texas… Acknowledge me!
Paul Heyman: Ladies and gentlemen, my Tribal Chief is here tonight to denounce a most vile and heinous breach of his fundamental rights as an athlete and as a human being. What I’m holding now in front of view isn’t some scribbles from an untalented four-year-old child; it’s an X-ray of my Tribal Chief’s ankle after the hideous injury sustained during the match against Bray Wyatt, aka The Fiend, at Bad Blood. Did Roman Reigns complained or threatened to sue this company despite a career-threatening injury inflicted in what some may describe as an unsafe working environment? No, Sir, he didn’t. All my Tribal Chief asked for was a little time to recover from a setback that had nothing to do with wrestling but rather big-game hunting. Did the CEO of this company grant him that time? No, Sir, she didn’t. After this once-in-a-lifetime god-like champion – pardon my rudeness – busted his ass for your entertainment what does he get in return? Nothing.
Wade Barrett: He’s got a point, here.
Paul Heyman: So, Roman Reigns has been strong-armed into defending his title at Extreme Rules. Good for you, Steph. I’m sure this will look good on your resumé. It won’t be the first time my Tribal Chief survives impossible odds. But if I may be so bold… that’s only one half of the picture. Let’s take a look at Roman Reigns’ challenger. What does…
[Seth Rollins’ music hits.]
Seth Freakin Rollins: Hold on, hold on! First of all, Paul, I would appreciate it if you could keep my name out of your mouth. Second of all, what are you complaining about? I thought Roman was in ‘God mode’? He should have no problem beating little old me, shouldn’t he? Plus, it’s Extreme Rules, he’ll have the back up of his cousins and all his friends… Oh, wait, wait, wait! I almost forgot: he’s got nobody left in his corner, except for you. What a shame.
Roman Reigns: You may think your new passion for cosplay is a new beginning but nobody will ever forget that you broke apart the most dominant group in the history of wrestling and you did that because of your insecurities. Deep down, you knew you couldn’t hang with me and Dean.
Seth Freakin Rollins: Ha! Ha! What I do like about you, Roman, is your sense of humour. Our time was over. I knew it, you knew it, the only idiot who didn’t know was Dean and look where his talent got him. Yes, that’s right, absolutely nowhere. If anything, I did you a favour when I hit you with that chair. Speaking of which… chairs are legal at Extreme Rules.
Roman Reigns: Where did you get the idea that I’m afraid of you? You mean nothing to me.
Seth Freakin Rollins: No, but that belt does. That’s the only thing you’ve got left and now I’m going to take it away.
Paul Heyman: That’s an interesting take on the situation, Sir, but I would remind you that you have done absolutely nothing to deserve that title shot – apart from being dismantled by my Tribal Chief a couple of years ago, that is.
Seth Freakin Rollins: I suppose my good looks convinced Stephanie to set up that match. I’m a charmer – sue me!
Paul Heyman: Last time I saw you in the ring, you lost to a midget in a tiger mask. Some would say that doesn’t make you a deserving challenger for the best prize in the WWE.
Seth Freakin Rollins: Wins, losses… who cares? You just have to be there when it matters and I know I can beat anyone in this company, including your Tribal Chief.
Paul Heyman: Including my injured Tribal Chief, yes, we got that. Maybe you would care to show your credential and actually beat someone before that match?
Seth Freakin Rollins: Ha! Ha! Ha! It’s a bit on the nose, Paul, don’t you think – no pun intended of course. Alright, I’m in a good mood tonight. You’re on. Who do you want me to beat up?
Paul Heyman: I was thinking of… this man.
[Finn Balor’s music hits.]
Mauro Ranallo: It’s Finn Balor! And judging by Rollins’ face, I think he expected someone else!
Wade Barrett: He probably expected anyone but him. Balor’s hardly lost a match in 2023. He’s got a huge mountain to climb.
Paul Heyman: I think that’s tonight main event settled, then. I’m looking forward to finally seeing you win a match, Mister Rollins.
[Reigns and Heyman make their way out as Rollins and Balor look intently at each other.] | 95
ANOTHER CHALLENGE
 
[Backstage, Cactus Jack is having a talk with a heavily-bandaged Ilja Dragunov.]
Cactus Jack: It makes me happy to see that you had the guts to come to the show this week.
Ilja Dragunov: I told you I want to learn from the best.
Cactus Jack: I was hoping you wouldn’t remember.
Ilja Dragunov: Remember what?
Cactus Jack: Your name, the way to this arena, the town, what you do for a living… ALL THOSE FAKE THINGS THAT RESIDE ONLY IN YOUR MIND! IT’S NOT REAL! NONE OF THIS IS! THE ONLY REAL THING IS THE PAIN! Can you feel it now?
Ilja Dragunov: It is with me every step of the way.
Cactus Jack: They say wrestling is fake. THEY EVEN SAID IT TO MY FACE ONCE! But that pain isn’t fake and she will become your best friend – if you can stay in control.
Ilja Dragunov: I don’t understand. I thought the idea was to inflict pain on my opponent.
Cactus Jack: You have so much to learn… but don’t worry, I will be like a father to you. I WILL MAKE YOU SUFFER AND BLEED UNTIL THAT PAIN BECOMES YOUR LIFELINE! Just like I did last week in the garage. That was your first step on a new path.
[Angelina Love runs into them.]
Angelina Love: Hey, I couldn’t help but hear your little tirade – you do make a lot of noise – and it made me think. You know I’m a manager now, right?
Cactus Jack: I don’t even know what ‘tirade’ means.
Angelina Love: Right. Well, if you’re looking for someone to dish out some punishment, I have exactly what you need. Six foot seven, 270 pounds… name’s Dijak. Does that ring any bell?
Cactus Jack: Do you want to fight him, boy?
Ilja Dragunov: I will fight anyone if you think it will make me a hardcore legend.
Angelina Love: It’s a match then! I guarantee you won’t regret it… or maybe you will! Let’s do this now!
[Love walks away with a smile on her face while Dragunov is already getting ready.] | 63
ILJA DRAGUNOV vs DIJAK
vs 
Samantha Irvin: The following contest is a hardcore match set for one fall. Introducing first, from Moscow, Russia… weighing in at 210 pounds… ‘The Invincible’ Ilja Dragunov!
Mauro Ranallo: It seems Ilja Dragunov wants to carve a niche for himself by following in the footsteps of the returning hardcore legend Cactus Jack. He certainly has the will to succeed but tonight, he has his work cut out for him.
Wade Barrett: Dragunov is a pitbull – once he sinks his teeth into someone’s meat, it’s impossible to pull him away. I’ll give him credit for not choosing the easy way in but a strong mind will only get you so far.
Samantha Irvin: And his opponent… making his way to the ring accompanied by his manager, Angelina Love… from Worcester, Massachusetts… weighing in at 270 pounds… Dijak!
Mauro Ranallo: Dijak is a physical specimen. He was also Angelina Love’s first client in the WWE and so far, he’s been very successful under her guidance.
Wade Barrett: We’ve all met someone like Dijak at some point in our lives. Someone who is just so much bigger and stronger than anybody else that they can do whatever they want – and have fun doing it. Dragunov is in for a rough evening.
Mauro Ranallo: And it looks like Dijak won’t even wait for the bell… Hardcore rules, folks, so remember – pretty much anything goes here. Straight from the start, Dijak is clobbering Dragunov after that cheap shot gave him an early advantage. He’s literally mauling his opponent!
Wade Barrett: Being a hardcore legend is one thing, being a glutton for punishment is another. Dragunov will learn the hard way that discretion is sometimes the better part of valour. He… What the…?
Mauro Ranallo: Oh, my God! Ilja Dragunov went down under Dijak’s massive blows but he grabbed a hockey stick near the ring and smashed it right across Dijak’s face! What a swing! And Dijak goes down like a ton of bricks. This might be over after just a few seconds!
Wade Barrett: He probably hid it there while all eyes were focused and Dijak and the beautiful Angelina Love. Or maybe that psycho Cactus Jack put it there for him.
Mauro Ranallo: Dijak is trying to get back up but he gets another shot right across the back for his troubles. Dragunov goes for another swing… but this time, Dijak blocks it. Now it’s a tug of war between these two competitors for control of that dangerous weapon. Did you see the marks on Dijak’s back and face? That thing is nasty.
Wade Barrett: That little weasel Dragunov is going to get found out thought. This struggle certainly favours Dijak who’s both taller and stronger.
Mauro Ranallo: It certainly looks that way… Dragunov is powerless to resist Dijak’s charge… and Dijak sends him crashing outside, after he pushed him over the top rope! Nasty landing for Dragunov who’s having a tough time getting back on his feet. Meanwhile, Dijak is going upstairs. What does he have in mind? Mamma Mia! Moonsault! Moonsault! Dijak connects with a moonsault from the top turnbuckle! What an impact!
Wade Barrett: This is world-class athleticism for a man of his size. He squashed Dragunov like a bug!
Mauro Ranallo: It’s not looking good for Cactus Jack’s apprentice. Dijak on the attack again… Overhead belly-to-belly suplex on the concrete floor! Miss Love wasn’t kidding when she said she had the perfect man for dishing out punishment. Despite taking some huge blows early on, Dijak has been dominating this match.
Wade Barrett: Say whatever you want about this man but he’s got a great creative mind when it comes to hurting people. He’s setting up Dragunov against the apron now…
Mauro Ranallo: Oh, my! He’s trying to bash Dragunov’s head against the ring apron. You can’t help but feel sorry for Dragunov, who wasn’t at one hundred percent going into this match.
Wade Barrett: Speak for yourself, Mauro Ranallo! I don’t feel sorry at all. I’m entertained by that great performer, Dijak, who definitely deserves a title shot soon.
Mauro Ranallo: That may be over the top but I guess you’re entitled to your opinion. Meanwhile, Dijak is continuing his onslaught, dragging Dragunov towards the ramp. He’s… wait, wait, wait! Don’t do that! No! Oh, my God! Death Valley Driver on the ramp! Ilja Dragunov has been completely annihilated so far and it looks like Dijak is done playing with his food. He’s dragging his opponent back to the ring.
Wade Barrett: Let it be a lesson to Dragunov – and a valuable one at that. Don’t mess with Dijak.
Mauro Ranallo: Dijak, adding insult to injury, is using the ropes as leverage to throw the unfortunate Dragunov back into the ring. He’s going up again… ah but he loses his balance somehow, wasting some precious seconds in the process… Dragunov is rushing in to try and push him down but Dijak leapfrogs him. Dragunov is thrashing about and Dijak shows his superior technique, applying a side headlock.
Wade Barrett: Call me predictable, but I enjoy seeing the bigger and better man give the geek a lesson he won’t forget.
Mauro Ranallo: Dragunov is desperately trying to break the hold… but Dijak uses his foot to block his as he was about to be rammed into the post. Dragunov can’t shake him off and you can see his face is turning red. It’s not looking good for him.
Wade Barrett: Angelina Love is feeling it. Dijak has been ignored for far too long by the power that be. Not only is he a great athlete but he’s also a proven winner who has wrestled all over the world. This man excels at everything he does.
Mauro Ranallo: Dragunov gave away 60 pounds to his opponent going into this match and it looks like it’s going to make a difference. He can’t move anymore as Dijak has been shifting his weight to prevent him from gaining any momentum. The referee’s checking on him.
Wade Barrett: Give up, you idiot! If you can’t get out of such a simple hold, you have no business being in this ring!
Mauro Ranallo: Let’s not be too harsh on Dragunov who had a tough… Oh! A punch to the… erm… lower abdomen! It’s all legal under hardcore rules! He caught Dijak flat-footed with this… unorthodox move. Off the ropes goes Dragunov… Torpedo Moscow! The flying headbutt hits the mark! What an impact! Is it going to be enough? 1… 2… 3! Yes!
Wade Barrett: You have got to be kidding me!
Mauro Ranallo: Ilja Dragunov absorbed a tremendous amount of punishment but in the end, he proved that he has what it takes to walk in the footsteps of the great Cactus Jack. Dijak dominated the matchup but at the end of the fight, it’s Dragunov’s fist that was raised high.
Winner by pinfall: Ilja Dragunov in 6:48 | 67
MISSING
 
Wade Barrett: He would have lost ten times out of ten in a fair fight! This is preposterous!
Mauro Ranallo: Well, moving on, last week on RAW, Matt Riddle was told in the middle of a match that his partner Misha has been reported missing. Our broadcast colleague Scott Stanford is standing by with an update on this dramatic situation.
Scott Stanford: Thank you, Mauro. Please welcome my guest at this time, Matt Riddle. Matt, first and on a personal basis, I would like to commend you for coming here tonight and answering my questions in what must be a very trying time for you.
Matt Riddle: Look, Scott, I’m not going to lie to you. I have a tough time getting out of bed in the morning, knowing Misha won’t be here.
Wade Barrett: I’m sure he had a tough time getting out of bed long before that.
Mauro Ranallo: Come on, Wade! Show a little respect!
Matt Riddle: I decided to come to El Paso tonight because I wanted to address a message to the WWE universe. If you know anything about Misha’s whereabouts, please, pick up your phone and call the police. Those of you who had a close one missing know what I’m going through and I wouldn’t wish that on anyone. If you think you can help in any way, please, do so.
Scott Stanford: Your match tonight was called off due to personal circumstances. What did the police say to you?
Matt Riddle: They say they’re doing everything they can to find her. I want to trust them but I also think they need all the help they can get.
Scott Stanford: Thanks again for your time, Matt, and here’s hoping this will soon be nothing but a bad memory.
Wade Barrett: Ok, let’s not beat around the bush, here. Matt Riddle is a pothead and any woman – let alone a mother – with any sense would want to stay as far away from him as possible. It’s as simple as that. She doesn’t want to be found.
Mauro Ranallo: Wade, please, this is a very serious matter. You can’t just… assume things like that.
Wade Barrett: Look, all I’m saying is that this man has a huge addiction problem. You’re not advocating for people to take drugs, are you?
Mauro Ranallo: … You’re impossible. | 80
LASHLEY VIGNETTE
[In a short video, Bobby Lashley is seen accomplishing various feats of strength and dishing out spears to various people. Lashley then speaks to the camera, from a place that could be the backyard of his house.]
Bobby Lashley: My name is Bobby Lashley and I am the All Mighty. When I walk around people make way because they know I could snap them in half just as easily as I snap my fingers. I wouldn’t even break a sweat. But once I’m gone, these very same people, they talk behind my back. I hear them. I know what they say. They say I’m too old for this business. They say the All Mighty is past his sell-by date. Hah. I lost one match and suddenly, they think they can doubt me. Then let the All Mighty tell you one thing and straight to your face. I will win the WWE Championship one more time before I leave this company. Those who would oppose me will face the wrath of the All Mighty. I have done everything there is to be done in wrestling and right now, as you can see, I’m enjoying a break but mark my words, I will be back because the All Mighty does whatever he wants, whenever he wants. And when I’m back, I will let nothing distract me and you will know what ‘All Mighty’ means. | 69
SECOND TIME’S THE CHARM ?
[Backstage, Mustafa Ali is talking to Tegan Nox.]
Mustafa Ali: Look, I know I screwed up last week but let’s stay positive – that’s one name we can scratch off the list.
Tegan Nox: Are you kidding me? There are dozens of people working on each and every show! One of them is stalking me and I should be happy because now, I know it’s not Apollo Crews?
Mustafa Ali: When you put it like that, it sounds disappointing.
Tegan Nox: That’s because it is disappointing! Maybe it’s just a game for you but I don’t know who sent me all these gifts and, frankly, it makes me feel very uncomfortable.
Mustafa Ali: I understand you want to see some progress but these things take time. Fortunately, I did a lot of what we, detectives, call ground work and I think I’ve nailed your man – it’s a term we use…
Tegan Nox: Thank God! Who is it?
Mustafa Ali: I’ve asked him to meet us here. We’ll confront him.
[Angel Garza walks down the corridor.]
Angel Garza: Hola, amigo! What did you want to see me for? [Looking at Nox.] Aha! I think I understand.
Mustafa Ali: Ok, let’s dispense with the pleasantries, amigo. I know you’re the one who’s been stalking Tegan here for weeks. It will easier for everyone if you come clean.
Angel Garza: What are you talking about? I was on vacation in Mexico for the past few weeks.
Mustafa Ali: So what? You’ve sent her unsolicited gifts. You’ve been harassing her! Tell me the truth!
Angel Garza: You think with this face, I need to send gifts in order to get a woman’s attention, burro? Did you pull my name out of a hat of what?
Mustafa Ali: No, but since you’re Mexican…
Tegan Nox: Oh, my God! That’s borderline racist! Look, I’m really sorry Angel…
Angel Garza: My dear, you have no reason to apologise – unlike this hijo de perra. [Turning to Ali.] You can say whatever you want about Mexico, I couldn’t care less. But implying I need to stalk women – that, I can’t forgive. [He slaps Ali in the face.] Meet me in the ring, joto!
[Garza walks away while Nox looks angrily at Ali.] | 57
ANGEL vs MUSTAFA ALI
vs 
Samantha Irvin: The following contest is set for one fall. Introducing first, from Monterrey, Mexico… weighing it at 205 pounds… Angel Garza!
Mauro Ranallo: It looks like Mustafa Ali got himself in trouble for the second week running. This mystery is proving a tougher nut to crack than he would have anticipated.
Wade Barrett: He made a huge mistake this time, though. Angel is not just a pretty face, he’s also pretty deadly inside the ring.
Samantha Irvin: And his opponent, making his way to the ring… from Chicago, Illinois… weighing in at 182 pounds… Mustafa Ali!
Mauro Ranallo: Ali comes alone this time and he looks pretty upset. However, his mixed bag of results on the investigation front shouldn’t blur the fact that he’s unbeaten on RAW since losing to Seth Freakin Rollins almost three months ago.
Wade Barrett: That’s because he hardly wrestles on RAW! Chicago’s finest, eh? The man’s a joke and he’s managed to point the finger at two members of minorities. Oh, and he broke a phone. Way to go, Ali.
Mauro Ranallo: Being a member of a minority himself, I’m sure he wasn’t biased. Anyway, the match gets underway and Garza goes straight on the attack but Ali blocks the punch and takes the initiative with a series of right hands, pushing Angel back into a corner.
Wade Barrett: For someone who can’t investigate a such a simple case, he’s very aggressive. People should look into his record. I wouldn’t be surprised if he had a history as a violent cop.
Mauro Ranallo: Please, let’s dispense with the baseless accusations here. Angel is pleading with Ali but he’s having none of it. Angel is doing his best to protect himself from a barrage of kicks and punches but… Oh! Gut shot from Angel and it’s Ali’s turn to look for some breathing space!
Wade Barrett: It’s not so funny when you find yourself on the receiving end of a cheap shot, eh Ali?
Mauro Ranallo: Come on, Wade, he’s done nothing illegal. Angel is following up, looking for the Backstabber… but Ali catches him right on the side of the head with a vicious back elbow. He’s been stopped dead in his track… Oh, wow! Ali with a Spanish fly out of nowhere! What athleticism! He goes for the cover… 1… 2… Angel raises the shoulder!
Wade Barrett: This guy is all flash and no substance. The referee’s count was suspiciously fast. I wouldn’t be surprised if they had some kind of deal. Wouldn’t be the first time the police abuse their power.
Mauro Ranallo: There was nothing wrong with that count. Still, Angel’s in dire straits. Ali hits a couple of leg drops but he’s not responding. This could be it. Ali’s going to the top turnbuckle and Angel is still not moving. Ali sets himself up… 450 Splash! Bullseye! It’s over! 1… 2… 3… No! Angel managed to wriggle free and this match continues!
Wade Barrett: It will take more than a couple of lame efforts to dispatch him! Angel’s fighting for justice tonight!
Mauro Ranallo: That may be a little over the top but indeed Ali is beginning to wonder: what does he have to do to put away Angel?
Wade Barrett: He wouldn’t be in that situation if he had kept his mouth shut!
Mauro Ranallo: Angel is crawling out of the ring, which is probably the wisest thing he can do at the moment since he can’t be pinned outside. Ali saw him and it looks like he’s climbing down too. Angel is trying to get his bearings. He’s had to absorb a tremendous amount of punishment tonight. Meanwhile, Ali is setting up the steel stairs… and that certainly spells trouble for Angel.
Wade Barrett: That man is a maniac. He wrongly accuses a fellow wrestler and now he goes out of his way to put him out of commission. Who does that?
Mauro Ranallo: Someone who wants to win, I guess. Ali seems pretty happy with his work but Angel is trying to mount a comeback with a double axe handle from behind! He smashes Ali’s head against the stairs. Superkick! And he sends Ali crashing against the barricade with a picture-perfect dropkick!
Wade Barrett: That’s the kind of fight Angel is – quick, vicious and unpredictable. Just when you think you’ve figured him out, he comes back stronger!
Mauro Ranallo: The momentum has shifted in Angel’s favour and suddenly Mustafa Ali looks more vulnerable. Angel picks him up… and he throws him head first into the post! My God, what a sickening sound. Angel is looking at the stairs… I think he’s got some evil intentions.
Wade Barrett: He wants some payback for being humiliated in front of a lady. I say it’s only fair.
Mauro Ranallo: Angel is now dragging the lifeless body of Mustafa Ali onto the ring but he won’t stop here. He’s moving up… Oh, no. He’s going for a superplex! He’s going to break Ali’s back against the steel! No! No! Don’t do that! Oh, my God!
Wade Barrett: No!
Mauro Ranallo: In an act of desperation, Mustafa Ali tried to push Angel. They both lost their balance and crashed against the steps, although I do think Angel got the worst of it. Both men are now lying on the floor, twitching with pain. What a horrible situation.
Wade Barrett: That was a very dangerous and reckless move by Ali who’s proving to a be a very dangerous worker as well as a very poor police officer. If you ask me, he should have braced for the superplex instead of trying something stupid.
Mauro Ranallo: Both men are now crawling toward the ring. They’re unlikely to be counted out, as per Triple H’s instructions, but whoever makes it first through the ropes will probably enjoy a massive advantage. They’re almost there… and Angel beats Ali to the finish. Kick to the midsection… he’s looking for the Wing Clipper but Ali is struggling… can he capitalise?
Wade Barrett: He’s trying to shake him off but if Angel can pull the trigger, this match is over. It’s a very effective move!
Mauro Ranallo: Angel can’t steady his prey, though and he will… Oh! Watch out! Once again, Ali rammed his opponent forward and sent him crashing into the post. That was enough to break the hold and Ali gets some space to manoeuvre now. Angel goes on the attack again with a right hand… Ali ducks and goes for the ride… Angel misses wildly again… Rolling facebuster! Angel didn’t see it coming! Ali, feeling the momentum shift, goes to the top turnbuckle again. He’s going for it! 054 Splash! Right on the target! What an impact! 1… 2… 3! Mustafa Ali comes out on top!
Wade Barrett: But remains and idiot and a bigot.
Mauro Ranallo: Come on, Wade, give credit where credit’s due. That was one hell of a fight and Mustafa Ali did well to overcome a very game Angel Garza tonight.
Wade Barrett: Meh.
Winner by pinfall: Mustafa Ali in 8:23 | 65
CONSEQUENCES
 
Mauro Ranallo: I’ll give you that he’s not any closer to finding out the truth about Tegan Nox’s mysterious stalker. Switching gears, MVP made some very serious allegations against this company and its CEO, Triple H. However, it seems this incident is far from over. Our cameras captured what happened earlier on the show.
[MVP and B-FAB are walking around backstage when a black man in an expensive suit comes up to them.]
Nathaniel Sykes: Sir, would you happen to know where I could find a… let me check… Montell Vontavius Porter, also known as MVP?
MVP: Ha! You’re talking like a cop, brother! It’s me. I hope I haven’t done anything wrong!
Nathaniel Sykes: Well, according to my client, you have. I have been sent to inform you that the comments made last week on Monday Night RAW could be considered as libel. In front of a very large audience, you clearly implied that this company unduly profited from the talent of wrestlers from a certain ethnicity. You even went as far as alluding to an accusation of racism. This is both wrong and inappropriate, even more so considering your relationship with my client.
B-FAB: Let me tell something, you son of a…
MVP: Please, let’s not get ahead of ourselves here. Surely, as a man of colour yourself, you understand my point, don’t you?
Nathaniel Sykes: Even if I did, it would be very unprofessional of me to tell you so, Sir. I might add that my activities leave me little time to enjoy… sports entertainment.
MVP: Let’s take a broader perspective, then. Do you think things have changed in this country over the past couple of decades for people like us? It’s time we got our due!
Nathaniel Sykes: That’s an interesting point of view and one I may enjoy discussing with you in other circumstances but, for the time being, I’m here to warn you that if you ever air your grievances again on this show or any other one for that matter, your contract will be terminated and my client will sue you for everything you’ve got. Surely, that’s something an intelligent man like you…
B-FAB: Ok, I let you talk because Mister Porter wanted to go easy on you but I’m done listening to you. You want to be a good little sheep and serve your masters. Good for you. But if you ever threaten this man, I guarantee you will regret it. This man has a vision, a vision that will benefit each and every one of us – even lowlifes like you! You should kiss the ground he walks on!
Nathaniel Sykes: An interesting proposition but, for now, I’ll retire, safe in the knowledge that my message was heard and understood.
[Sykes walks away while MVP’s and B-FAB’s stares burn a hole in his back.] | 62
CIAMPA POKES THE BEAR
Wade Barrett: Terrible. What happened to free speech?
Mauro Ranallo: I’m guessing this is a rhetorical question. I’m not sure calling out your employer in front of a live audience qualifies as free speech, though.
Wade Barrett: Then what does?
Mauro Ranallo: I think this is a question that will have to remain unanswered for now as our broadcast colleague Byron Saxton is waiting for us backstage.
Byron Saxton: Thank you, Mauro. Please, welcome my guests at this time: Johnny Gargano and Tommaso Ciampa, #DIY. Guys, you made it very clear that you are gunning for Sami Zayn’s and Kevin Owens’ titles and…
Tommaso Ciampa: Excuse-me, kid. Who?
Byron Saxton: Sami Zayn and Kevin Owens, the current tag team champions.
Tommaso Ciampa: Ah, you mean Sami Zayn and his fat fanboy.
Johnny Gargano: Yes, he meant Zayn Jr. You’ll have to excuse my friend, Byron. He doesn’t really keep up to date.
Tommaso Ciampa: Then what’s your question, baldie? Are we afraid of them. Well, Sami Zayn’s a formidable opponent. His fat friend, not so much. He’s just riding Zayn’s coattails.
Byron Saxton: You do realise Kevin Owens is a former Universal champion in his own right?
Tommaso Ciampa: Yeah, way back when he was Chris Jericho’s sidekick. Now he’s Zayn Jr. That’s one hell of a career he’s making for himself. Let’s put it that way: if we manage to get fatso in the ring, I think the title is ours.
Johnny Gargano: That’s not a very nice way to say it but he’s correct. Zayn Jr is the weak link and we intend to use that to our advantage.
Byron Saxton: For now, you’re facing the Hurt Business. Do you have any plan to deal with the mix of technical ability and sheer violence Shelton Benjamin and Cedric Alexander bring to the table?
Johnny Gargano: Yes. We’ll just beat them at their own game. | 67
SHELTON BENJAMIN AND CEDRIC ALEXANDER vs TOMMASO CIAMPA AND JOHNNY GARGANO
Samantha Irvin: The following contest is a tag team bout set for one fall. Introducing first, representing the Hurt Business… at a combined weight of 453 pounds… Shelton Benjamin and Cedric Alexander!
Mauro Ranallo: I had the opportunity to talk to Shelton Benjamin the other day and I couldn’t help but notice the disdain in his voice when we spoke about this new generation of wrestlers. He says they don’t make them as tough as his former college roommate, Brock Lesnar.
Wade Barrett: Lesnar is a genetic freak, a once-in-a-lifetime specimen so it’s a standard you can’t really hold anyone against. However, I have to say I enjoy Benjamin as a teacher. Every match, he carries what he calls his ‘bag of tricks’ and pulls out something new to hurt his opponents.
Samantha Irvin: And their opponents… making their way to the ring… at a combined weight of 407 pounds… Tommaso Ciampa… Johnny Gargano… #DIY!
Mauro Ranallo: A win against such an established tag team would certainly bring Gargano and Ciampa one step closer to their ultimate goal – claiming the RAW Tag Team Championship. But that’s easier said than done.
Wade Barrett: I’ll be honest, I never cared much for Gargano but he did show some personality when he destroyed his family and knocked Chelsea Green pregnant. He deserves some credit for that, at least.
Mauro Ranallo: Alright… Well, here we go with some hot tag team action coming your way! Johnny Gargano and Cedric Alexander going right at it and these punches find their mark. Alexander sends Gargano for a ride but he hangs onto the ropes. Never mind that, Alexander rushes in… Oh! And Johnny Wrestling sends the Queen City’s favourite son crashing down hard on the outside!
Wade Barrett: That guy is a weasel. He doesn’t have the strength to compete at this level but he uses every trick in the book to get an advantage.
Mauro Ranallo: Another way to put it is that he is tough as nails. He also has no regards for his own safety… Gargano is going for it! Suicide dive! Bullseye! And Alexander’s back was crushed against our announce table. For a high-flyer like him, that has to be a pretty huge blow. Judging by Gargano’s body language, he may not get the chance to show off his skills though… He throws him back in… Cover! 1… 2… 3… He almost had him but Shelton Benjamin barged in and broke the count!
Wade Barrett: That’s the added value of teaming up with a true veteran like Benjamin. He felt his partner needed support and he wasn’t afraid to put his foot in… in Gargano’s face in this case but you get the idea.
Mauro Ranallo: Referee Rod Zapata would certainly disagree here but order is restored as both men are looking to tag out… and in come Benjamin and Ciampa. Benjamin with a great show of power here, blocking Ciampa’s strikes while hitting the target with a couple of uppercuts. Ciampa with an Irish Whip… Shelton leapfrogs him – amazing agility here… Oh, my! He caught him square with a roundhouse kick!
Wade Barrett: People tend to forget that Shelton Benjamin is more than just an angry old man. He’s first and foremost an excellent technician.
Mauro Ranallo: And a spinebuster for good measure! Ciampa took his eyes off the prize for a second and he paid for it. Benjamin with the cover… But Ciampa rolls him up! 1… Benjamin breaks free and he connects with a big boot straight to Ciampa’s face! Gargano is ready to join in… but Benjamin sees him out of the corner of his eye… and catches him with a jumping knee! Gargano’s out cold!
Wade Barrett: Benjamin is one of these people time has no effect on. He just enjoys hurting people and he will continue to do so as long as his body lets him. Unfortunately for Ciampa and Gargano, he’s in great shape!
Mauro Ranallo: Benjamin cleared the ring in a matter of seconds. He has been absolutely devastating since getting in but he seems ready to let Cedric Alexander take over. Here he comes… Oh, my God! Lumbar Check on Tommaso Ciampa! It’s over! It’s over! 1… 2… 3… No! Ciampa kicked out at two and a half! Alexander isn’t happy with the referee and neither is Benjamin.
Wade Barrett: That was a ridiculously slow count! This one should be over!
Mauro Ranallo: It seems tempers are flaring at the moment. Benjamin, Alexander and referee Rod Zapata are having an animated conversation… I don’t believe it! Out of nowhere came Tommaso Ciampa to hit a discus clothesline on Cedric Alexander, who accidentally knocked Benjamin off the apron! What a strike!
Wade Barrett: One dodgy decision is all it takes to snuff out a team’s momentum. That idiot Zapata ruined this match!
Mauro Ranallo: It’s far from over but Ciampa and Gargano are back in control. Alexander is dragged into the opposite corner where Gargano connects with a leg drop from the top rope! Cover… 1… 2… and Alexander grabs the rope!
Wade Barrett: He needs to get out of here!
Mauro Ranallo: That may not be an option. As you mentioned earlier, what Ciampa and Gargano lack in size, they make up for in grit. Gargano tags in and he immediately makes his presence felt with a corner dropkick straight to Alexander’s face! And a double stomp to boot!
Wade Barrett: This has got nothing to do with wrestling, it’s a downright mugging! It’s almost two on one!
Mauro Ranallo: It looks like Benjamin is still out, unfortunately for Cedric Alexander, who finds himself in the wrong part of town at the moment. Gargano tags out… snapmare… and Ciampa finishes the sequence with a frog splash! By his own admission, Ciampa doesn’t like high-risk manoeuvres but it looks like this one paid off. 1… 2… 3… Oh, no!
Wade Barrett: Oh, yes!
Mauro Ranallo: Shelton Benjamin just hit Ciampa on the head with a fire extinguisher and Rod Zapata has no choice but to call this match off. What a shame!
Wade Barrett: I disagree, it’s a great ending. Ciampa prides himself on being tough. Let’s see if he’s tougher than that fire extinguisher.
Mauro Ranallo: It looks like Benjamin isn’t done… he’s running towards Gargano… who stops him dead in his tracks with a superkick! Benjamin’s face got smashed against his own weapon! This match has descended into utter chaos! There are bodies everywhere!
Wade Barrett: I can’t believe you’d condone that level of violence. The match was over and Gargano viciously attacked a respected veteran. He should be fined, at the very least.
Winners by disqualification: Tommaso Ciampa and Johnny Gargano in 7:23 | 61
BUSINESS ADVICE
Mauro Ranallo: I wouldn’t hold my breath, if I were you. Meanwhile, let’s get backstage where our broadcast colleague Byron Saxton is standing by.
Byron Saxton: Thank you, Mauro. Please, welcome my guests at this time John Morrison and MMM. John, as per Triple H’s announcement last week, the next Money in the Bank ladder match will take place in March, at WrestleMania. Do you feel under pressure to cash it in with that new schedule?
John Morrison: Ha! Let me make something very clear, Byron. There is no such thing as pressure because I plan ahead. [Showing off his briefcase while sucking on his oversized cigar.] I know exactly what I will do with this baby, just like I knew exactly where I would take MMM when I took over. That’s because, like Maxxine here, I’m not just a pretty face; I’m also a businessman, someone who can use their intelligence to make the tough decisions. Now, someone who doesn’t think like a businessman is AJ Styles. AJ, we paid you a visit on SmackDown this Friday but you were nowhere to be found, buddy. Some would say that makes you a coward but I disagree. In my book, that makes you someone who wants to survive.
Byron Saxton: Indeed, AJ Styles prevented you from cashing in on Gunther at Bad Blood. Do you think it could happen again? AJ has made it clear that he believes you don’t deserve to be a champion.
John Morrison: AJ, let me talk to you. I’ll admit I was a bit upset at first but I believe we can talk this through. What’s your problem? Are you jealous because I’ve got everything – the pals, the gal, the money and soon the belt? Don’t be like that! I’m afraid you don’t really fit in with the standards of our agency… does he, Max?
Maxxine Dupri: Geezers with soccer mom hair aren’t really in demand at the moment.
John Morrison: So, I can’t make you a sidekick… sorry, a partner, but I can make you my first challenger once I win the title. What do you make of that, old friend? It’s a good deal. You get your five minutes in the spotlight and I get an easy title defence. Everybody’s a winner.
Byron Saxton: You don’t seem to be taking him very seriously?
John Morrison: To be honest…
EC3: Let me stop you right there.
John Morrison: Erm… No, sorry pal, I don’t have any change on me.
[MMM laugh out loud and even Saxton can’t help but smile at that dig.]
EC3: Very funny. Not so long ago, you and I, we weren’t so different.
John Morrison: Please! We were never anything alike! You wish we were. When I was released, I went on to wrestle all over the world. I was a main-eventer everywhere I went. Can you say the same? Do you ever step in front of a mirror, Ethan? The guy looking back is you. You really do look like a bum. Damn it, you even act like one, ranting about being in control. You’re not in control, you’re nothing. You could have been someone but so could anyone.
EC3: And yet, you came back as Miz’s sidekick. I respect you for turning your career around but if you think you weren’t in the situation I find myself in at the moment, you’re delusional.
John Morrison: [Turning to Maxxine.] I hate it when they do that. He just won’t go away until we throw him a bone. Maxxine Dupri: We could ask Otis to throw him out.
John Morrison: Let’s have a little fun instead. Hey, Truth, you want a match with EC3?
R-Truth: First, I want to know why they call him Easy3!
John Morrison: I’m sure you’ll figure it out. [Turning to EC3.] Happy?
EC3: You think you can humiliate me but I accept your challenge.
[Truth and EC3 make their way to the ring and Truth can be heard in the distance: ‘Hey, tell me something about Easy3 that only Easy3 would know!’]
Maxxine Dupri: Why do you bother with that idiot.
John Morrison: We used to be tag team partners. I feel like I owe him something… | 62
EC3 vs R-TRUTH
vs
Samantha Irvin: The following contest is set for one fall. Introducing first, accompanied to the ring by man.soor… representing Maxximum Male Models… from Charlotte, North Carolina… weighing in at 220 pounds… R-Truth!
Mauro Ranallo: This impromptu matchup was made just moments ago by Mister Money in the Bank, John Morrison and by the looks of it, it seems that he’s got bigger fish to fry than Ethan Carter III.
Wade Barrett: I think Morrison nailed it. EC3 has no place on this show. R-Truth is an incompetent clown who’s well past his sell-by date but even he should make short work of that idiot.
Samantha Irvin: And his opponent… from Palm Springs, Florida… weighing in at 210 pounds… Ethan Carter III, EC3!
Mauro Ranallo: EC3 has apparently been offered a WWE contract although he didn’t make it clear who signed him in the first place. I think it’s fair to say that his first run in the company turned out to be a huge disappointment and, by his own admission, he’s now on borrowed time.
Wade Barrett: Let me make this perfectly clear. EC3 is a waste of valuable TV time. Nobody cares about him, nobody wants to see him. If he so badly wants to take control of something, he should definitely look elsewhere because WWE is synonymous with chaos.
Mauro Ranallo: Regardless, this match will take place and R-Truth starts very aggressively but EC3 sidesteps him and sends him crashing headfirst into the corner. R-Truth is stunned and EC3 takes advantage with a kick to the midsection… Oh, and a vicious-looking DDT. Definitely not the start Truth had in mind.
Wade Barrett: Let him have his moment. Last time around, he was carried by that junkie Jeff Hardy but I guarantee that this guy doesn’t have the stamina to go all the way. Every second that passes brings R-Truth closer to victory.
Mauro Ranallo: That’s a very bold statement considering what’s going on in the ring. EC3 is setting up his opponent on the top turnbuckle. That doesn’t look good at all for Truth… He’s going for a superplex… Oh, my God!
Wade Barrett: I told you so!
Mauro Ranallo: R-Truth somehow reversed it in mid-air and turned it into a neckbreaker! He almost decapitated EC3 with that move! R-Truth is a veteran but his athleticism is second to none! He hooks the leg… 1… 2… and EC3 survives that. At this level, a mistake is often all it takes to completely swing the momentum. EC3 is trying to get back to his feet… but he gets caught by a Truth Axe!
Wade Barrett: There’s method to R-Truth’s madness. He’s focusing his strikes on Carter’s neck.
Mauro Ranallo: Truth is on a roll here. Corkscrew calfkick… Oh, but EC3 ducked out of the way and Truth accidentally hit the referee! And that’s man.soor’s cue, I’m afraid.
Wade Barrett: I’ll admit that the means are… unsavoury but sometimes, you have to cross the line if you want to get rid of someone who doesn’t get the message. Carter brought it upon himself.
Mauro Ranallo: That’s a very personal take on the situation. The bottom line is that EC3 is fighting an uphill battle against two members of MMM, with R-Truth and man.soor now unloading on the unfortunate former NXT champion. Falcon arrow by man.soor. They are having a field day.
Wade Barrett: That’s what happens when you get into people’s face. You may not like it but, ultimately, they’re doing him a favour by putting him out of his misery.
Mauro Ranallo: It’s absolutely revolting. man.soor is now holding EC3 for R-Truth to deliver the coup de grace… Lil’ Jimmy. Look at these two! They’re proud of themselves. Now, man.soor is going to the apron for a move he calls Search and Destroy… it’s a springboard… Oh! Would you believe it? Somehow, EC3 got out of the way and man.soor just took out an unsuspecting R-Truth!
Wade Barrett: Noooo!
Mauro Ranallo: Referee Chad Patton is back in action, asking man.soor to leave the ring. Meanwhile, EC3 is looking to finish this… One Percent! He hit the One Person on R-Truth! Is it enough? 1… 2… 3! He did it! EC3 got the win, despite – or maybe thanks to – mansoor’s interference!
Wade Barrett: I don’t… How did they manage to botch that? That coward EC3 is leaving like he’s been shot through a cannon as he knows they’d kick his sorry ass if they could get their hands on him but the damage is done. I can’t believe these useless clowns managed to lose that one!
Winner by pinfall: EC3 in 5:47 | 44
GRACE HITS BACK
 
Mauro Ranallo: That’s certainly not R-Truth’s finest hour. Up next, ladies and gentlemen, Randy Orton will be in action live, one-on-one, against a former world champion in his own right Dolph Ziggler. But before we get into that, Byron Saxton is having a busy night. What’s up, Byron?
Byron Saxton: Well, Mauro, I’m with Jordynne Grace. Jordynne, last week on RAW, you teamed up with Bayley in order to beat two members of the Hachi Jendai, albeit in controversial fashion. What’s next for you?
Jordynne Grace: Let me get this straight. I couldn’t care less about Bayley or Charlotte Flair and whatever problems they may have with Iyo Sky at the moment. I’m a new face here and I have to work my way up the ranks if I ever want to be involved in a title shot. That’s fair enough. However, that doesn’t mean I’m going to let people bully me around.
Byron Saxton: Are you thinking of someone in particular?
Jordynne Grace: Cute. Yes, I’m talking about the bitch that can’t keep my name out of her mouth, Bianca Belair. You don’t like me, I got that. Now what you should understand is that I’m not here to help you with your insecurities. You bore the pants off everyone who’d listen to you about how fat and useless I am and when we finally got into the ring, you realised you couldn’t beat me and you had to cheat. What you are, Bianca, is a coward. You bit off more than you could chew – and yes, pun intended – but you wouldn’t face up the consequences so you took the easy way out. I knew I’d give a run for your money but I wasn’t sure I could beat you. Now, I know I can. And you call yourself the ES…
[Belair bursts in and the two of them start brawling around the backstage area without anyone getting the upper hand, until a group of officials pull them apart.] | 66
LIABILITY
[Shelton Benjamin and Cedric Alexander are being checked in the treatment room when MVP and B-FAB come in.]
Cedric Alexander: Hey, boss. What’s…
MVP: Spare me the pleasantries, I’ve got to talk to you.
Cedric Alexander: Look, I know…
B-FAB: Shut up. He’s not talking to you.
MVP: No, I’m talking to you Shelton. When we took you in the Hurt Business, where were you?
Shelton Benjamin: I don’t remember.
MVP: Answer me, dammit! Forget it, I’ll answer that one for you. You were in no man’s land. You were an afterthought.
[Benjamin looks on angrily but doesn’t say a word.]
MVP: I allowed you to cultivate your bitter veteran persona because, quite frankly, I thought you’d earned it and it gave you an edge. But let me tell you a harsh truth: these weapons have become a crutch. When you feel the match slipping away from your grasp, you look into this bag and get yourself disqualified. You take the easy way out.
Shelton Benjamin: You didn’t always feel this way.
MVP: No, you’re correct. But right now, I’m in the middle of something important and difficult and I need people I can trust. I don’t need more problems at the moment and you are turning into one, big problem, Shelton. If you’re more trouble than you’re worth, I won’t hesitate to let you go.
Shelton Benjamin: You can’t do that, man! I’ve always been loyal to you!
MVP: Then don’t become useless or you will leave me without a choice.
Shelton Benjamin: I’m not some luggage you can leave behind. I’m warning you…
MVP: No. I’m warning you. If you keep losing like that, I will have to look elsewhere for help.
[Benjamin shakes his head and leaves the treatment room with Alexander in tow.]
MVP: [Talking to B-FAB.] We need more back-up. Call the people whose numbers I gave you. Now. | 50
DOLPH ZIGGLER vs RANDY ORTON
 vs 
Samantha Irvin: The following contest is set for one fall. Introducing first, from Hollywood, Florida… weighing in at 218 pounds… ‘The Showoff’ Dolph Ziggler!
Mauro Ranallo: It looks like MVP is finally losing patience with Shelton Benjamin’s antics but that’s a matter for another time as, right now, we are about to see the next chapter in a long and storied rivalry between two iconic superstars.
Wade Barrett: Dolph Ziggler’s stock has fallen and is probably at all-time law but when he puts on his A-game, he remains a threat for almost anybody. He’s been there and done that. The question is, can he find his mojo back?
Samantha Irvin: And his opponent… making his way to the ring… from St. Louis, Missouri… weighing in at 275 pounds… He is ‘The Viper’… Randy Orton!
Mauro Ranallo: The Apex Predator is back to his old, disturbed self and it will be interesting to see if his loss at Bad Blood has any lasting consequences. He tried pushing Riddle’s buttons and got his tailed kicked for that.
Wade Barrett: So you keep saying but Riddle has to bear at least some responsibility as he should have known that Orton was suffering from IED. Randy Orton has an exceptional IQ and, unfortunately, that often comes with a few drawbacks. Ziggler would be well-advised to keep that in mind and keep a low profile.
Mauro Ranallo: This one is going to be physical, as there is little love lost between these two. The bell’s ringing and right from the start, Orton rolls out of the ring. This is a rather unexpected strategy from the Viper who usually shows a more aggressive side. Maybe his loss at Bad Blood convinced him to opt for a more cautious approach.
Wade Barrett: Don’t be ridiculous Mauro Ranallo. Orton always thinks two moves ahead of his opponent.
Mauro Ranallo: Ziggler follows him suit… Oh, but Orton rams against the apron, which is the hardest part of the ring. I stand corrected: he is as vicious as ever, only more cunning. Look at that sick smile on his face… he’s obviously enjoying himself. What does he have in mind now? Oh, my God! Powerbomb! He just smashed Ziggler’s back into a million pieces here!
Wade Barrett: Ziggler bumped off the apron and is lying face first on the ground. He’s in for a long night.
Mauro Ranallo: Things haven’t been going the way Ziggler was hoping over the past few months and this match looks set to continue the trend. Orton is pouncing on his prey and he continues his onslaught with a serious of punches to the back of the head. Those are banned in UFC and there is a reason for that. Orton isn’t done… he’s stomping Ziggler into the ground.
Wade Barrett: I think Ziggler’s strategy is a sound one. Take your beating like a man and live to fight another day. Ha!
Mauro Ranallo: Orton is striking a pose. He’s obviously pleased with himself.
Wade Barrett: And why wouldn’t he? If you had that physique and that pedigree, you’d probably feel good too.
Mauro Ranallo: I can’t say for sure. Meanwhile, Orton is picking Ziggler up… reversal and back first into the apron goes Orton who… Oh, my! Ziggler hits the target with a Superkick out of nowhere! Did you see the way Orton’s head tilted? He’s stunned!
Wade Barrett: He should have hoped for a quick match. Making Orton angry is the worst thing that could happen to him.
Mauro Ranallo: Ziggler obviously feels he’s been disrespected by his opponent. He’s shouting something at Orton. Oh, no! He’s going to Bulldog him onto the steel steps… Wow! What a reversal! Orton used his opponent’s momentum against him and turned the Bulldog into a Backbreaker! Judging by that thud we heard, that was brutal!
Wade Barrett: I think he’s trying to send a message to the rest of the locker room. Ziggler is just a victim here.
Mauro Ranallo: That may be so but Orton is pushing the limits here. This could turn ugly real soon, particularly with that back suplex on the stairs… No! Ziggler lands on his feet and he immediately leaps back… Jumping DDT! And he plants Orton into the concrete floor! Ziggler, running on adrenaline now, puts the exclamation point with an elbow drop right to the heart.
Wade Barrett: I’ll be honest, I didn’t think he had it in him to upset Orton. I still don’t think he can beat him but he’s impressed me.
Mauro Ranallo: Orton is thrown back unceremoniously into the ring by Ziggler, who goes straight for the top turnbuckle. He’s looking for a high-risk move here… but Orton is already back on his feet. My God, there’s no keeping him down, is there? Both men are now unloading on each other in a precarious position… Who’s going to come out on top? Orton is trying something… Is he… He goes for an Earth-shattering superplex! Orton has absolutely no regard for his own safety or that of his opponent and he’s also relentless. He’s setting Ziggler up for one his trademark spike DDT but… he’s going to the apron. No, no, no!
Wade Barrett: He’s going to kill him!
Mauro Ranallo: God gracious! Orton just spike DDTed Ziggler on the concrete floor, from the second rope! It’s absolutely horrible! My God! There’s no way Ziggler is getting up from that. The referee should stop the match. All the while, Orton is laughing like a demonic gargoyle, perched on the apron. Is there any line he’s not willing to cross?
Wade Barrett: Look, you’re not going to like it but people like Randy Orton are made of a different ilk. You can’t judge them by ordinary standards. He might be… different but he’s one of the best to ever grace this squared circle.
Mauro Ranallo: I’m not sure ‘grace’ is the right word. The Viper is parading at ringside now, taunting fans and daring referee Dan Engler to stop the match. He’s coming over here… Hey! That’s my bottle of water! He’s… he’s spilling water in Ziggler’s face in order revive him. His bloodlust hasn’t been sated yet, apparently. He’s turning around again, looking for some weapon to hit him with.
Wade Barrett: Someone like Orton is always looking for his limit. Unfortunately, very few people have been able to push him there.
Mauro Ranallo: Are you kidding me? He’s a sadist! He’s going to… Look out! Ziggler! Acting out of instinct, Dolph Ziggler got up and he caught Orton straight between the shoulder blades with a powerful dropkick! Orton crashed straight into the barricade! He knocked the breath out of him… and the Famouser! Ziggler delivered a picture-perfect Famouser right in front of the fans! This match isn’t over yet!
Wade Barrett: Good for him but the ring is a very long way away and Orton weighs more than 250 pounds. He’s never going to bring him back in there.
Mauro Ranallo: He’s going to try! Inch after inch, Ziggler is crawling closer to an unlikely victory. He’s almost there but pulling Orton’s carcass into the ring is no mean feat. Ziggler looks completely exhausted but he’s almost there… Yes, he’s made it!
Wade Barrett: But look at Orton! Like a true veteran, is rolling away from the ropes while Ziggler is hoisting himself back in. These precious few seconds could make all the difference.
Mauro Ranallo: Both men are up on their feet. Ziggler goes for a sucker punch but Orton blocks it… Oh! Low blow! Low blow from Orton!
Wade Barrett: What are you talking about? It’s a kick to the midsection!
Mauro Ranallo: The referee’s view was blocked. Ziggler can’t defend himself… RKO! And just like that, Orton hits his devastating finishing manoeuvre. 1… 2… 3! It’s over! Orton escapes by the skin of his teeth.
Wade Barrett: No, he doesn’t. He dominated that matchup. You were rooting for the underdog but he never came close to beat him in a million years. The only credit Ziggler deserves is for staying alive for so long when Orton was moping the floor with him.
Winner by pinfall: Randy Orton in 10:22 | 63
WORDS OF COMFORT
Mauro Ranallo: Our broadcast colleague Scott Stanford is at ringside to collect Randy Orton’s first comments after what has been a gruelling match against Dolph Ziggler.
Scott Stanford: Yes, Mauro, I’m with Randy Orton. Randy, congratulations on a hard-fought victory but my first question will be about your former friend and tag team partner’s current situation. What do you have to say to Matt Riddle, whose partner has been missing for a week now?
Randy Orton: Well, you see, Scott, sometimes in life, you lose track of the things that really matter to you. For instance, imagine for a moment that you just won the biggest match of your career. You’re pleased with yourself and you want to celebrate that. Some people, they just don’t know when to stop, you see. Meanwhile, their loved ones – people who care about them – they’re on their own. Who knows what could go through their heads or what could happen to them?
Scott Stanford: I’m not sure I’m following…
Randy Orton: All I’m saying is that Misha was left alone when she had to go through a home intrusion a week before. That’s not wise.
Scott Stanford: I’m sorry, Randy… are you smiling?
Randy Orton: No, no, not at all. I’m just happy to get that win. It goes without saying that I’ll be a good neighbour and call Riddle if I hear anything about his partner’s whereabouts. He must be very worried. I’m sure being tied up in a cold, damp, abandoned warehouse can’t be good for her health or the baby’s…
Mauro Ranallo: My God! Is he implying…?
Scott Stanford: Randy, tell me you didn’t go too far!
Randy Orton: No, of course not. I was just making an assumption. That’s probably what’s going on but maybe she got herself lost and found or maybe she just left on her own. After all, I haven’t been to Riddle’s place since… well, two weeks ago, actually, but I didn’t get the chance to speak with Misha that time so I don’t know anything about her current frame of mind. By the way, congratulations on that fluke victory at Bad Blood. I hope it was worth it.
Mauro Ranallo: He… he practically admitted he abducted Riddle’s partner!
Wade Barrett: Hold on a second. I think you’re reading too much into his comments. As you mentioned, he just had a tough match against a former world champion. Don’t blow this out of proportions. He did say he’d help Riddle if given the chance. | 80
SHOWDOWN
Mauro Ranallo: You can’t be serious, Wade. It seems tensions are rising everywhere in the WWE at the moment and Shane McMahon – Mr McMahon, as he wants to be called now – has contributed to the current mood with the resurrection of his father ill-fated ‘Kiss My Ass Club’. However, his idea has been relegated to the background since he tried to introduced Bron Breakker.
Wade Barrett: Breakker is one of these entitled young men who won’t pay their dues to those who came before them. It’s a shame and I, for one, applaud Mr McMahon for trying to teach some respect to that punk.
Mauro Ranallo: Last week on RAW, Robert Roode offered to team-up with Bron Breakker in what turned out to be a setup. It seems Breakker won’t let the matter drop though and he tried to confront Shane McMahon earlier today.
[A cameraman is following Breakker through the WWE headquarters until a secretary stops him.]
Bron Breakker: I need to see Shane. Now.
Secretary: Mr McMahon is busy at the moment but I’m sure…
Bron Breakker: Now.
Secretary: Ok, Sir. Give me a second, please. I will speak with him.
[She turns around while Breakker paces nervously around the lobby.]
Secretary: Alright. He says you can come in. He will see you now.
[Breakker growls and makes a bee line to the door but as soon as he walks in, he’s caught by a chair shot to the head. The secretary screams while Bronson Reed starts hurling furniture at Breakker. Shane and Roode follow suit and the situation turns into a three on one fight. Breakker hits back with everything he’s got but when Reed throws him through a glass door, it’s game over. Reed and Roode keep beating him down for a while until Shane starts taking his trousers down.]
Shane McMahon: [Showing off his cheeks.] So, you wanted to see these, you little degenerate, uh? Are you happy now? You’d like to give them a little kiss, maybe, uh? [Pulling his pants up.] No, no, no. You haven’t earned it… yet. But I agree with you on one thing: this has been going on for too long, way too long. Next week on RAW, my man Bronson Reed will meet you in the ring and once he’s pinned you – and only then – will you be allowed to join the club. Then, we’ll think about introducing that green-haired tramp but let’s not get ahead of yourself. I want you to enjoy your big moment. You see, Bron, my skin is very soft so I’d like you to prepare your lips. Roode?
[Robert Roode picks up a lipstick and starts smearing Breakker’s face. After a few seconds, the three of them leave the place, laughing.] | 65
BF… NOT FOR EVER?
 
[Backstage, Sami Zayn and Kevin Owens are having an animated conversation.]
Sami Zayn: Look, Kev, you’re angry. But why are you so upset? It’s just one match! Gargano and Ciampa are good but we’ve faced better teams.
Kevin Owens: It’s not the match… I don’t care about that. I know we will beat them. It’s not them, it’s you.
Sami Zayn: Me?!
Kevin Owens: When they kicked you out of the Bloodline, we were finally on the same wavelength. For the first time in ages, we fought side by side. We were brothers and we still are. I’m having the time of my life but Sami, you are just so naïve.
Sami Zayn: What are you talking about?
Kevin Owens: You jump through every hoop! That whole ‘Zayn Jr’… it’s so obvious. They’re trying to drive a wedge between us and all you had to do was tell them we’re equal and that would have been over.
Sami Zayn: Who cares about that stupid hashtag, Kev? I won’t grace them with an answer.
Kevin Owens: They knew you wouldn’t and that’s why we’re having this conversation. You have to wise up!
Sami Zayn: Are you trying to say I’m a simpleton? If you want my honest opinion, I’ve been pulling more than my weight in this team – a lot more, actually. I was on the verge of winning the Universal Championship when we formed that team and I know I could have challenged Roman Reigns again. I didn’t. I didn’t because of you, Kev, because you wanted me to drop the matter.
Kevin Owens: What? Of course, I wanted you to move on! You were getting your ass handed to you on a weekly basis! Don’t you remember?
Sami Zayn: What I do remember is that every time we try to build something together, you grow jealous and you ruin everything. Don’t be like that, Kev. Don’t be yourself.
Kevin Owens: I beg your pardon? This team exists because of me and you’re trying to change the subject. That whole ‘Zayn Jr’ wouldn’t be an issue if you had been a good partner!
Sami Zayn: Stop saying ‘Zayn Jr’ like it’s an insult, will you? You know what, Kev? Screw you! I’ve been trying to placate you for weeks now and whatever I say, whatever I do, it’s never good enough for you. You’ve got a chip the size a of planet on your shoulder but that’s none of my business. We’ll keep these titles because I know you’re at least competent in the ring. As for the rest, deal with it or find another shoulder to cry on.
[Zayn leaves angrily while Owens looks on with a look of frustration on his face.] | 83
LANCE ARCHER vs AUSTIN THEORY (INFERNO MATCH)
 vs 
Samantha Irvin: The following contest is an inferno match. The only way to win is to set your opponent on fire. Introducing first… from Dallas, Texas… weighing in at 289 pounds… He is ‘The Murder Hawk’… Lance Archer!
Mauro Ranallo: Lance Archer has been back for a few weeks in WWE and he has already done a lot of damage.
Wade Barrett: His first run wasn’t a resound success but he travelled all over the world, honed his craft and he comes back now, ready to prove himself. I don’t think he’s interested in winning titles at this stage of his career but he wants to make a mark and his savagery and appetite for destruction are his weapons of choice.
Samantha Irvin: And his opponent… making his way to the ring… from Atlanta, Georgia… weighing in at 220 pounds… Austin Theory!
Mauro Ranallo: Austin Theory took a few weeks away from WWE action after Lance Archer put his girlfriend, WWE Hall of Famer Trish Stratus, through a ladder but the self-proclaimed king of hardcore is back with a vengeance.
Wade Barrett: What Theory lacks in size he makes up for in viciousness and aggression. I know some fans found his vignettes with Stratus underwhelming but this young man has been carrying WWE’s flagship show on his shoulder for months. Archer would be well-advised to approach this match with caution.
Mauro Ranallo: At Austin Theory’s request, two ‘fire pits’ – for lack of a better term – have been lit on each side of the entrance ramp, giving this match a real hellish feel.
Wade Barrett: Despite Trish Stratus’ absence, Theory didn’t come alone; he’s got his trusted kendo stick with him.
Mauro Ranallo: And it looks like he’s going to use it… Oh, my God! Unbelievable! Austin Theory went straight for Archer’s head with his stick… He took a wild swing and Archer didn’t even flinch! Theory, discarding his weapon of choice for now, goes for a series of forearms to the face with no visible effect. Archer is grinning as the blood pours down his forehead and lips. What a horrible sight!
Wade Barrett: Theory made a very aggressive start to the match but Archer has a tremendous pain threshold. He’s in for a long night.
Mauro Ranallo: Theory didn’t expect that kind of reaction and… Oh! Did you hear that sound? Archer just knocked him down with one single punch! Archer, standing tall over Theory… Oh, and what a vicious kick to the ribs. Austin Theory is probably about to face one of the sternest tests of his career. He’s crawling to the ropes but he will find no respite there as this is essentially a no disqualification match. Archer comes in behind him… German suplex! Oh, no! Theory landed on his head!
Wade Barrett: It’s incredible what a few years can turn a man into. I sincerely hope Theory will get the chance to experiment such development further down the line… if he survives tonight’s match, that is.
Mauro Ranallo: Archer continues to methodically dismember Austin Theory with an abdominal stretch… and he plants his elbow into Theory’s neck area. I can only imagine what this must feel like as Theory has no way to protect himself.
Wade Barrett: The match has just started and Theory already looks like he’s been in there for hours. His fire and venom are in stark contrast with Archer’s attitude. He’s calm and collected, cold even.
Mauro Ranallo: Theory is trying to get some distance between himself and Archer in order to regroup but I don’t think he will get the chance… Mamma Mia! Lance Archer just picked him up and threw him up over the top rope like a ragdoll! How can you do that to a grown man!
Wade Barrett: Theory almost tumbled into the fire but he stopped just in time.
Mauro Ranallo: I think we can all respect Austin Theory’s desire for revenge but was it really worth risking his career? Lance Archer comes out… Oh, no! He’s going to powerbomb him into the fire! Don’t do that, Lance! No! At the last second, he turned around and planted him into the apron. What a beating!
Wade Barrett: It takes a brave man to endure that kind of punishment but Lance Archer is looking invincible right now. What was he thinking when he challenged him?
Mauro Ranallo: Archer is playing with his food now, tossing Theory against the post repeatedly. He could put him out of his misery any time now – assuming you can call throwing someone into the fire putting them out of their misery. The crowd is trying to rally behind Austin Theory, who’s crawling away from Lance Archer but there’s no escaping the Murder Hawk.
Wade Barrett: Everybody will feel sorry for Theory but you have to admire Lance Archer’s merciless cruelty. He came back to inflict as much pain as he can and that’s exactly what he’s doing.
Mauro Ranallo: And he’s having fun doing it, it seems. He’s asking Theory to strike him. That’s how little he thinks of his opponent! Theory with a chop… and again, Lance Archer laughs it off. Theory is considering going for a second chop but… but he’s asking Archer to strike him! Is this hardcore or what!
Wade Barrett: No. It’s moronic.
Mauro Ranallo: Archer duly obliges… and he almost sends Theory tumbling over the steps. What a strike! Oh and Theory crashes hard against the steel with a big boot. He’s been painfully humiliated since the beginning of the match. Is there any way out for him?
Wade Barrett: Remember, he asked for it.
Mauro Ranallo: Nobody deserves that. Archer is setting him up again… No! Piledriver! Piledriver on the steel steps! Is there something this man is not willing to do to his opponent? It looks like the referee has seen enough. He’s going to stop this match, I think. Shawn Bennett is checking in on Austin Theory but I don’t… Hey! What’s he doing! Stop that! Lance Archer has grabbed the referee and he’s… No! No way! He just threw Shawn Bennett into the fire! Fortunately, the paramedics were ready to step in but, boy, was that scary!
Wade Barrett: If you can’t stand the heat… erm, poor choice of words here. Ok, it’s unacceptable but Bennett brought this upon himself when he…
Mauro Ranallo: Are you serious? No, he didn’t deserve that! Nobody does! Oh! Austin Theory hits back with a low blow while Archer’s back was turned! Where does he find the strength to keep on going? This time, Archer felt it. Theory follows up… Stun Gun on the ring apron! And all of a sudden, Lance Archer is just a man again! A-Town Down! It’s incredible! Austin Theory has swung the momentum back in his favour!
Wade Barrett: It may have been enough in a normal match but unfortunately for him, he needs to throw his opponent into the fire.
Mauro Ranallo: Austin Theory has been manhandled for the majority of this matchup but he hanged on and on and he’s now within touching distance of an unlikely victory. Inferno matches aren’t for the faint of heart but I don’t think you will see anyone shedding any tear for… Are you kidding me? Archer hits back with a jaw breaker out of nowhere!
Wade Barrett: What does Theory have to do to keep him down? He just keeps coming back!
Mauro Ranallo: Lance Archer’s bloodied face makes for a grim sight as he’s grinding Theory’s head against the steel ramp. And just like that, he snuffed out Theory’s comeback. I don’t think… Wait a minute… Someone’s running down the ramp!
Wade Barrett: It’s Trish Stratus!
Mauro Ranallo: With a chair in hand! And she whacks it repeatedly across Archer’s back! But just like the kendo stick earlier, it seems to have little effect on the Murder Hawk. My God, he’s turning around… and sends Stratus down with a punch to the gut. What kind of a lowlife hits a woman like that, without a second thought? Stratus is down to her hands and knees and… no, he’s not thinking about throwing her into the fire, is he?
Wade Barrett: You’re not going to like the answer but once again she put herself…
Mauro Ranallo: Stop it, please! He’s going to kick her in! Somebody, do something! No! Austin Theory hits Archer with a standing dropkick… he loses his balance against the kneeling Trish Stratus… and he falls head first into the fire pit! It’s over! It’s over! Austin Theory slayed the monster!
Winner: Austin Theory in 11:20 | 68
A PICTURE IS WORTH A THOUSAND WORDS
Wade Barrett: Did you see that? The paramedics tried to rescue Archer but he pushed them away and ran backstage like Frankenstein’s creature on fire. What a grim sight.
Mauro Ranallo: That was absolutely horrible but on the flip side, Austin Theory and Trish Stratus are celebrating a great win… well, maybe a little too enthusiastically. Guys, you’re on live television! There are kids watching! Alright, let’s get backstage where Byron Saxton is waiting for us – hopefully.
Byron Saxton: Er… yes. Yes, Mauro… I’m with… [Saxton sees Shinsuke Nakamura stumbling around, a bottle of sake in hand.] Shinsuke Nakamura. Shinsuke, last week on RAW, you surprised a few people with your harsh comments during Dexter Lumis’ match against Angel. What seems to be the problem this time?
Shinsuke Nakamura: Nani? Tamare, Byron! Unworthy foreigners!
Byron Saxton: Okay… Previously, you… Excuse me… Shinsuke, where are you… [Nakamura appears to be leaving but suddenly turns around and hits Saxton with a knee to the face before turning to the camera.]
Shinsuke Nakamura: Kinshasaaaaaa!
[The camera pans on the left, where Dexter Lumis is standing, a picture in his hand. He gives it to Nakamura who holds it up. It shows Lumis and Nakamura punching each other in a ring. Nakamura sneers.]
Shinsuke Nakamura: The great Shinsuke Nakamura… will do battle with you… unworthy yet silent foreigner. Let’s… drink to that!
[Lumis walks away, leaving Nakamura alone with his bottle.] | 56
ANOTHER INMATE
Mauro Ranallo: It’s almost time for our main event but before we get to that, we just receive another video from Cathy Kelley. Roll on the footage, please.
[Kelley and the Undertaker are standing in another monitor room. Kelley is looking very nervous.]
Cathy Kelley: Are you sure we’re in the right place? I swear this place looked different yesterday.
The Undertaker: This place is made of many rooms. All different and yet all the same.
Cathy Kelley: And as luck would have it, no sign of these NG tapes. Let’s try this one, then: TP.
[The low-resolution camera, set near the ceiling of the room, shows a tall, balding man sitting at a very long table. A large figure is hiding in the shadows.]
Man in the shadows: Can you tell me your name?
TP: My name is Thomas Pe…
Man in the shadows: Can you tell me your name?
TP: My name is Baron Co…
Man in the shadows: Can you tell me your name?
TP: My name… my name is Mercy the Buzzard.
Man in the shadows: And why are you here, Mercy?
TP: Because they… they said that they might have to cut me off, terminate my contract.
Man in the shadows: Who are they?
TP: The suits. Those who make the decisions. They live… if the ring is the first floor, then they live upstairs. They look down upon us and they cast judgement. They decide who wins and who loses, who becomes a champion and who doesn’t.
Man in the shadows: Some people might consider this as paranoia. You think other people are in control of your destiny?
TP: That’s the truth! I work my ass off! Any day, any match, I’m always up for it. I’m bigger and stronger than most people on this roster and what do I have to show for it? One f*****g United States Championship reign.
Man in the shadows: How does that make you feel?
TP: Helpless. It makes me feel like the dice are loaded.
Man in the shadows: Then you should be happy that they are about to let you go.
TP: I… no. It’s the opposite of happiness. I considered… I’ve thought about ending it all.
Man in the shadows: But instead, you came here.
TP: I have nothing left to lose.
Man in the shadows: That cannot be revealed.
TP: Can you tell me more about Him?
Man in the shadows: He comes from another place… eager for fun and… other pleasures. When Bray Wyatt wears a smile on his face, everybody runs.
[The Fiend’s face suddenly appears on the screen, bringing a scream out of Kelley.]
Cathy Kelley: What was that?
The Undertaker: Another piece of the puzzle.
Cathy Kelley: I don’t understand. That was… that was Baron Corbin out there. But how could he be in this asylum before he became one of the Funhouse’s characters? That doesn’t make any sense.
The Undertaker: Madness rarely does.
Cathy Kelley: If he was a part of it two years ago, then why did Bray Wyatt harass him? We saw the home invasion, the ceremony… There has to be an explanation.
The Undertaker: Then you will need to look for it. You shouldn’t stay in this place for too long, though. He saw you.
Cathy Kelley: Who did?
The Undertaker: Him.
Cathy Kelley: How? When?
The Undertaker: When he appeared on that screen.
[Kelley casts a worried glance at the monitor, picks up her stuff – including the digital camera – and quickly walks away.] | 84
SETH FREAKIN ROLLINS vs FINN BALOR
vs
Samantha Irvin: The following contest is set for one fall. Introducing first, from Davenport, Iowa… weighing in at 225 pounds… He is a visionary… he is a revolutionary… Seth ‘Freakin’ Rollins!
Mauro Ranallo: Seth Freakin Rollins accepted Paul Heyman’s challenge but he will have his work cut out for him if he wants to prove he deserves to face Roman Reigns for the WWE title at Extreme Rules.
Wade Barrett: An injured Roman Reigns, I might add. Regardless, Seth Rollins is suffering from a major case of over-confidence. He believes his chaotic attitude makes him unpredictable but one thing this pundit can confidently predict is that he won’t make it to Extreme Rules.
Samantha Irvin: And his opponent… accompanied to the ring by the members of the Church of Kane… from Bray, County Wicklow, Ireland… weighing in at 190 pounds… Finn Balor!
Mauro Ranallo: Indeed, Wade, Finn Balor is yet to be pinned in 2023, despite feuds with Edge and Braun Strowman, to name but a few. Now, with the Church of Kane by his side, he looks unstoppable.
Wade Barrett: Roman Reigns is fortunate that he turned his attention to Bray Wyatt or he would be facing a very different opponent at Extreme Rules. As it stands, Balor is not only a superb athlete but also a charismatic leader with a stable full of talent at his disposal.
Mauro Ranallo: You are correct and this could be a deciding factor in this matchup as Kane, King Cuerno, Uncle Howdy and Indi Hartwell cut impressive figures at ringside. The bell’s ringing and both men go straight for it, unloading on each other. Rollins, with a knee to the midsection and a takedown… he’s eager to show off his technical ability.
Wade Barrett: Regardless of Rollins’ questionable record, this is going to be a huge match between two superstars who will be challenging for major honours in the near future.
Mauro Ranallo: They go tit for tat at the moment, with Balor countering Rollins’ headlock with a hammerlock. Rollins frees himself… Oh, and he connects with a big forearm, wiping the smile off Balor’s face. Balor is looking for revenge but Rollins ducks out of the way and pushes Balor into the corner. A follow-up… but Balor catches him with a back elbow.
Wade Barrett: They’re still gauging each other. They’re not ready to take a chance yet.
Mauro Ranallo: Finn Balor is going upstairs as Rollins is trying to stop him but a mule kick gives him the breathing space he needs. Balor drops down, grabs a hold of Rollins and he sends him crashing shoulder first into the corner! Roll-up… 1… No, Rollins gets out… Balor goes for the enzuigiri but Rollins blocks it and a stomp to the back kills whatever momentum Balor had.
Wade Barrett: Listen, what’s the point of even having this match? There’s nothing in it for Finn Balor and you’d expect him to give everything he’s got. Even if Rollins wins, it doesn’t make him a worthy challenger. It would be a hollow victory and yes, I’m very serious so stop rolling your eyes Mauro Ranallo, I can see you!
Mauro Ranallo: Worthy or not, Rollins continues his onslaught with a series of clobbering blows to the back of Balor’s head and another kick to the spine for good measure. He’s dragging him to the apron and uses the ropes in order to apply more pressure to the neck area.
Wade Barrett: What a surprise! The referee has absolutely no control on this match. You’re suppose to make a count, you idiot!
Mauro Ranallo: Come on, there’s no need for name-calling here, Wade. The referee does break the hold… Oh! But Rollins unceremoniously kicks Balor out of the ring. There is no love lost between these two competitors as you might remember that Balor had to relinquished the WWE Universal Championship just weeks after being crowned the inaugural champion, way back in 2016.
Wade Barrett: I have to say I liked Rollins better then. He’s a caricature now and to be honest, I don’t think children should be exposed to his antics, let alone be allowed to cheer for him.
Mauro Ranallo: In the end, we all become caricatures, Wade. Meanwhile, Seth Freakin Rollins is considering a high-risk move… Yes, he’s going for the suicide dive… Oh! Wow! Finn Balor leaped back out of nowhere and caught him with a springboard crossbody! Great athleticism on display here! He can’t keep Rollins down though but he lifts him on his shoulder… He’s going for the Death Valley Driver… Rollins gets out of it… rolling elbow… but Balor counters with a hip toss! What a sequence!
Wade Barrett: It’s a credit to Balor’s resilience that he’d come back after Rollins tried to bend the rules to get an unfair advantage. Honestly, Rollins would make for a very poor champion and I, for one, hope Stephanie McMahon will cancel that pointless title match.
Mauro Ranallo: That remains to be seen but for the time being, Balor is looking to knock Rollins’ lights out with a kick to the head. No, block by Rollins but Balor connects with the enzuigiri! Off the ropes goes Balor… Rollins with a leapfrog but again, Balor reacts quicker, catches him in mid-air and face-first goes Rollins on the mat. And now, it’s Rollins’ turn to deal with those vicious forearm strikes to the back of the head.
Wade Barrett: It’s not so funny when you find yourself on the receiving end of those, eh Rollins? Hey, look who’s there!
Mauro Ranallo: The WWE champion Roman Reigns and his special counsel Paul Heyman will make ringside even more crowded but Rollins is in no position to notice that for the moment as Balor is smashing his head against the mat. My God, he really hates him with a passion.
Wade Barrett: We’ll never know what Balor’s WWE career might have been without the injury that cost him his first major title reign. Forgive him for keeping a grudge.
Mauro Ranallo: I daresay that the company he’s keeping at the moment hardly makes him more friendly. Still, it can’t be argued that he’s firmly in control of this matchup now, giving Seth Rollins a hard time in the corner. Clothesline… and a snapmare to take him down. Oh, and a double stomp! It looks like Finn Balor is ready to put an end to this. He’s going for the Coup de Grace as Roman Reigns looks on with disdain in eyes.
Wade Barrett: Some challenger Rollins turned out to be. Utter joke.
Mauro Ranallo: Balor soars through the air… and he crashes on Rollins’ boot! He raised his foot at the very last second! How did he do that? And Rollins, pouncing like a cat on his prey hits back with a big elbow drop! What does he have in mind, now? Falcon Arrow… but Balor counters with a knee to the head… released German suplex by Balor… but Rollins lands on his feet… Balor ducks a superkick, goes for the Pelé kick but Rollins sidesteps him… Balor crashes face first on the match… this is the opening Rollins was looking for… He’s going for the Curb Stomp! Balor blocks it… Slingblade! And a kick to the face for good measure!
Wade Barrett: These two know each other a little too well. It’s going to take something special to surprise the opposition.
Mauro Ranallo: Right now, it’s hard to imagine how either of them could put the other way but there’s plenty of drama to unfold in this main event. Balor with a front headlock, I think he’s looking for a DDT here but Rollins won’t allow it. He’s ramming Balor against the ropes… Oh, My! He pulled him up and dropped him on the top rope, punching the air out of his lungs… Superkick! This time, Rollins hit the target and Balor dropped on the concrete floor like a ton of bricks!
Wade Barrett: Using the ropes that way is illegal or it should be!
Mauro Ranallo: Come on, Wade, less than an hour ago, you were praising Shelton Benjamin for using weapons! You can’t be serious.
Wade Barrett: I’m paid to give my honest opinion and that’s what I’m doing here. I always call it straight down the middle.
Mauro Ranallo: If you say so… Rollins, meanwhile, is going to the top turnbuckle and it looks like he’s got some evil intentions, here… Frog Splash! No! Oh, my God! Finn Balor raised his knees at the last moment. Rollins’ ribcage must be completely shattered! This is… Hey, what’s Indi Hartwell doing on the apron? Oh, no. Kane is grabbing Rollins by the throats… Chokeslam! What a revolting development!
Wade Barrett: There’s a lot history between these two, too, and the least that can be said is that Kane’s treatment left a lot to be desired when Rollins was the champ.
Mauro Ranallo: That was seven years ago, for God’s sake! And now, Roman Reigns is spitting on his former ‘brother’. Indeed, it does look like Seth Freakin Rollins made a lot of enemies along the way. Balor is staggering but the evil smile on his face tells the whole story – he’s back in the driving seat. He sends Rollins crashing against our table with Hurricanrana. What a sickening thud.
Wade Barrett: I don’t know about you, Mauro Ranallo, but I’m having the time of my life! I enjoy seeing a fraud like Seth Rollins being exposed in front of the world.
Mauro Ranallo: I can’t say I agree with you. Balor is bringing Rollins back inside the ring. He hooks the leg… 1… 2… and Rollins survives. Finn Balor is taking his time now… he knows he’s in complete control. He’s dragging Rollins closer to the ropes… Guillotine. This is not looking good at all for Seth Freakin Rollins, who can hardly defend himself at the moment. He’s bravely trying to get up… but Balor brings him down again with a springboard DDT. My God, he spiked his head right into the mat.
Wade Barrett: It may seem cruel to you but that’s just the natural order of things. Finn Balor is enjoying his workout but nine times out of ten, the better guy wins.
Mauro Ranallo: This match isn’t over yet, though. Balor is completely ignoring Rollins at the moment. He’s exposing the turnbuckle? It seems winning this match isn’t enough, he wants to hurt his opponent. And now he’s asking King Cuerno… for a chair? I don’t get it. This isn’t a no disqualification match.
Wade Barrett: There’s more than one way to skin a cat. Some people can be very creative when it comes to hurting others and inside this ring, Finn Balor is a bloody genius.
Mauro Ranallo: He’s… he’s sitting down? Can you believe it? Finn Balor is taking a breather while Seth Rollins is trying to get back up. And look at his smile! He’s having fun!
Wade Barrett: Why wouldn’t he? Rollins does look like Bambi on ice at the moment.
Mauro Ranallo: That’s hardly surprising after the beating he took. Still, it’s a credit to his character that he would keep on fighting after all the abuse he had to go through tonight. Unfortunately, he doesn’t seem aware of Balor’s position. He’s boxing shadows at the moment. Balor sneaks him behind him… and he bulldogs him onto the exposed turnbuckle!
Wade Barrett: Great move!
Mauro Ranallo: Rollins’ forehead has been slashed open. The El Paso crowd are very upset with what’s going on at the moment but I don’t see a way back into this match for Rollins, myself. Meanwhile, Balor is pointing at the chair. What does he want to use it for? Oh-oh… he’s setting it up around Rollins’ neck. He’s not going to…? He’s going upstairs… He’s going to break his neck!
Wade Barrett: An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth.
Mauro Ranallo: Don’t be an idiot! The referee has got to stop this! He’s… Oh, what now?
Wade Barrett: Who turned the lights out?
Mauro Ranallo: What’s going on? That red light… It’s the Wyatts! Or what’s left of them anyway. Sister Abigail, Mercy the Buzzard and Taylor Rotunda are in the middle of the ring… Abigail rushes on and she pushes Balor down! My God, what a nasty fall! She took him by surprise, he didn’t have any time to react. And right on cue, the Church of Kane members are invading the ring. The referee is ending this match but I don’t think anyone will notice him.
Wade Barrett: Watch out!
Mauro Ranallo: It’s The Undertaker! The Undertaker is here, right behind Kane! Kick to the midsection… and The Undertaker tombstones his own brother! Chaotic scenes here as we draw to a close – I see Roman Reigns and Paul Heyman have decided to make themselves scarce… There are bodies everywhere! We had a few matches set up for next week we wanted to tell you about but I’m told we’re out of time. See you next week, folks!
Result of this match: Draw in 16:10 | 81
Show rating: 84
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Post by mistersocko on Oct 22, 2024 22:49:54 GMT 1
Friday, September Wk3, 2023 From West Valley City, UT
COLE AND MCAFEE INTRODUCTION
Michael Cole: Welcome everyone to Friday Night SmackDown! I’m Michael Cole and this is my broadcast partner Pat McAfee. We come to you live from West Valley City, Utah, two weeks away from Extreme Rules and boy, do we have an action-packed program for you tonight!
Pat McAfee: Last week, Dominik Mysterio proved once again that he is a piece of human garbage by revealing himself as the man behind Cody Rhodes’ mugging. He will be in action in a few minutes but that’s not all we have in store.
Michael Cole: Drew McIntyre came so close again to overthrowing Gunther only for the mystery masked guy to ruin his efforts again. In tonight’s main event, McIntyre will face Pete Dunne but he will have to be wary of another attack.
Pat McAfee: I wonder whoever it maybe. I’d say Logan Paul certainly has a motive after having his ass handed to him by McIntyre on a couple of occasion but, honestly, can you see him trying to hide his identity?
Michael Cole: No. On a different note, Jimmy Uso thought he was on top of the world after he made himself the new tribal chief by winning a triple threat match at Bad Blood, only for his cousin Jacob Fatu to appear last week and challenge him.
Pat McAfee: I wouldn’t want to be in his shoes. Jey and Solo aren’t very happy with the way he won that match – thanks to his wife Trinity – but Jacob Fatu is more than just a force of nature, he’s also a bona fide thug. I don’t think anything good will come out of this.
Michael Cole: The Judgement Day crossed yet another line when they attacked Big E on his return, after a career-threatening neck injury. They sent him back to the hospital but they also ignited a war with the New Day.
Pat McAfee: The Judgement Day is all about strength in numbers but Woods and Kingston are multi-times tag team champions. Maybe this time, they bit up more than they can chew.
Michael Cole: We can only hope. They were obnoxious before but Scarlett and Karrion Kross have turned them into a bunch of psychopaths since they joined the group. It seems they’re playing a game of one-upmanship between them.
Pat McAfee: These scumbags have bled Karl Anderson dry in the middle of this ring and in an incredible turn of events, they even brainwashed Luke Gallows and convinced him to join them. Their gang keeps growing and someone has to put a stop to it. Kingston and Woods are on a path of revenge and hopefully, that will give them all the strength they need.
Michael Cole: Last but not least, the Women’s Tag Team champions Liv Morgan and Raquel Rodriguez will defend their titles later tonight and RAW’s Cora Jade and Piper Niven.
Pat McAfee: It’s an intriguing matchup. Normally, I wouldn’t bet on Cora Jade and Niven but they held their own against Asuka and her understudy Sarray last Monday on RAW so, who knows? Maybe an upset is on the cards tonight…
Michael Cole: It wouldn’t be a normal SmackDown without at least a few of those. We’ve been told that the SmackDown Women’s champion Becky Lynch will be here tonight to address the WWE universe and… Ah, it looks like we are getting ready for our first match of the evening! | 72
ANGELO DAWKINS vs DOMINIK MYSTERIO
 vs 
Melissa Santos: The following contest is set for one fall. Introducing first, accompanied to the ring by Montez Ford… from Cincinnati, Ohio… weighing in at 260 pounds… he is one half of the SmackDown Tag Team champions… Angelo Dawkins!
Michael Cole: Dawkins will be flying solo tonight but Ford will be at ringside and hopefully, the extra pair of eyes will ensure the playing field remains level.
Pat McAfee: Ford is such a natural entertainer that people tend to forget that Angelo Dawkins is a sound technician as well as a powerhouse. He’s got all the tools to shine as a singles competitor and this is as good a chance as any to prove it.
Melissa Santos: And his opponent… accompanied to the ring by Luke Gallows… representing the Judgement Day… from San Diego, California… weighing in at 200 pounds… ‘Dirty Dom’, Dominik Mysterio!
Michael Cole: Every time you think this kid can’t sink any lower, he finds a new way to surprise you. He’s a disgrace to his whole family and to his heritage. I can’t help but feel sorry for his father Rey when he heard about what happened in that San Antonio nightclub.
Pat McAfee: A lot of people seem to enjoy this guy’s antics. Maybe it’s generational, I don’t know… Personally, he makes me sick but look around you, Cole… all these people with Dirty Dom T-shirts!
Michael Cole: Don’t ask me. The match is about to get started and Dirty Dom is offering his hand to Dawkins. How could anyone be naïve enough to fall for such an old trick in 2023 is beyond me… And Dawkins obviously did his homework, taking Dominik down before the bell even rings with a short-arm clothesline!
Pat McAfee: That stupid smile he wears on his face really makes me want to punch him. Can’t blame Angelo here.
Michael Cole: The longer you spend in the ring with Dirty Dom, the more likely you are to fall victim of one his shenanigans. Dawkins knows this and that’s why he’s going all-out from the get-go. He delivers a massive powerbomb and that could be it for this squash match… 1… 2… Dirty Dom survives.
Pat McAfee: Only two species would survive a nuclear war – cockroaches and Dominik Mysterio.
Michael Cole: Mysterio is trying to get away but Dawkins is hot on his heels… He’s going for the running Bulldog… but Dirty Dom escapes him and he counters with a vicious chop block! And just like that, Dawkins’ momentum is snuffed out. Mysterio is now working on Dawkins’ left leg with a series of nasty-looking knee strikes.
Pat McAfee: That punk is everything we said about him and then some but he came here tonight with a gameplan. He’s looking to negate Dawkins’ size and strength advantage by keeping him on the mat.
Michael Cole: The crowd aren’t liking this one bit but we’ve reached the point where Dominik actually revels in their hatred. Honestly, I think there’s only one man on this planet who could talk some sense into him but whether Rey has the patience to do so is another matter. Meanwhile, Dom is pushing Dawkins through the ropes… Oh! Wow! He stomped his head into the mat from between the ropes!
Pat McAfee: It’s a shame that kid lost his way because he’s really creative. He’s done well to turn this match on its head. Michael Cole: Come on, you can’t be serious. He doesn’t belong in a WWE ring. When he’s not incredibly lucky, he just cheats his way out of trouble. He goes for the cover… 1… and a kick out. I mean, look at Dawkins: he’s strong, athletic… and now look at Dominik and tell me he has any right to win this match. And true to form, Dominik is now instructing Gallows to set up a table on the outside while Montez Ford is trying to rally the crowd behind his partner.
Pat McAfee: And what about Gallows? I mean, is ever going to be anything other than a lackey or a goon? He’s always doing someone else’s bidding.
Michael Cole: Unfortunately for Dawkins, that last shot to the head did a lot of damage and Mysterio keeps targeting the same areas. The table is set and Dominik is now dragging Dawkins’ massive frame to the top turnbuckle. I don’t know what he’s got in mind but his intentions can’t be good. Mysterio, now standing precariously on the top ropes… he’s setting up Dawkins… Oh, my God! No! Oh, my God! Powerbomb through the table! He just threw Dawkins from 15 feet through that table!
Pat McAfee: His back may be broken in half! It’s just a regular match! That kid has completely lost it!
Michael Cole: Montez Ford is absolutely furious! He’s making a bee line to Dominik but Gallows blocks his path and they start unloading on each other! The referee is checking on Angelo Dawkins, who’s twitching on the floor. And look at Dominik. He’s laughing in the middle of all that chaos! This is just… He makes me sick.
Pat McAfee: I think the table somehow broke his fall. With a little bit more momentum, Mysterio would have missed the table and it could have been a tragedy. The referee has to stop this match now.
Michael Cole: Charles Robinson is having a torrid time keeping things under control. Dominik is taking his time now, taunting the crowd – he knows this match is virtually over. He’s checking the debris while his partner in crime – literally – is keeping Montez Ford in check. What a scumbag! Dirty Dom is now dragging Dawkins back into the ring like he doesn’t have a care in the world.
Pat McAfee: I think he wants to prove he doesn’t need his Mami to win matches. Some grown-up he turned out to be.
Michael Cole: I know this isn’t a talk show but really, what is the world coming to? This is the kind of character people admire now? A piece of street trash who shows no respect for anyone? He’s… Oh, no. He’s setting him up on the second rope and laughing about it. He’s going to do it… 619! And he connects under a chorus of boos. At least, it’s over… 1… 2… 3… Come on! He’s just there to piss people off! At the last second, Dirty Dom pulled Dawkins’ shoulders up!
Pat McAfee: There’s a collection of horrible human beings on SmackDown at the moment but Dominik has to be the worst of them!
Michael Cole: He’s just pushing everybody’s buttons. That kid is nothing but a jackass. He’s going for the Frog Splash now… Hey, who’s this?
Pat McAfee: Someone’s jumping over the security rail! It’s…
Michael Cole: It’s Cody Rhodes! He’s rushing inside the ring and Dominik has nowhere to go! Cody Cutter!
Pat McAfee: The referee has no choice but to end this match but it was worth it!
Michael Cole: Dominik and Gallows are running away like they’d seen a ghost… and maybe they did. The American Nightmare is back on SmackDown! The skullduggery is over! There’s a new sheriff in town!
Winner by disqualification: Dominik Mysterio in 9:25 | 64
RHODES WANTS GALLOWS… FIRST
Pat McAfee: Rhodes is absolutely incensed and it looks like he’s got a few things he wants to get off his chest!
Cody Rhodes: So, West Valley City… What do you want to talk about? I’ve got a couple of topics I’d like to discuss, myself. Yeah, spending a couple of weeks in a hospital bed and watching your own daughter cry herself to sleep because she’s fearing for her daddy’s life does that to you. Dom… I don’t know what your deal is and, quite frankly, I don’t care. I’ve got much bigger things than you to worry about. But since you’ve managed to force yourself into my life, I’m going to give you my undivided attention but I promise you that you are not going to like it. So, here’s what’s going to happen: next week on SmackDown, you will feed me Luke Gallows and once I’m done with him… Oh, when I’m done with him it will be just you and me, Dom. Enjoy the next couple of weeks, kid, because you have no idea what’s coming to you.
[Rhodes drops the microphone and walks away.]
SHE’S BACK!
Michael Cole: Wow! Strong words from Cody Rhodes who will have to put aside his own title aspirations to teach a lesson to that street trash Dominik Mysterio.
Pat McAfee: I wish someone would… Hey! Wait a minute! Is it…?
Michael Cole: It’s Mandy Rose! Mandy Rose is back! She was released almost a year ago, after one of the longest reigns as NXT Women’s champion! Apparently, someone within the company decided she was worth making a complete U-turn on her contract situation.
Pat McAfee: Let’s hear what she’s got to say.
Mandy Rose: I know some of you are very pleased to see me again. In my time in the entertainment industry, I’ve learnt something very important. If you want people to love you, open your heart; if you want them to be crazy about you, close it. You see, there’s a very thin line between attraction and addiction and someone – whose name I don’t need to say out loud – found out the hard way that my presence was more than wanted; it was needed. And let’s be honest for a minute here, who wouldn’t need this?
Michael Cole: She hasn’t lost any of her confidence but she might find that this a different playing field.
[Camella’s music hits.]
Carmella: Wait, wait, wait, wait! I’m sorry but… who are you? Last time I saw you on my TV screen, you were sucking up Otis’ face! Nobody cares about you!
Mandy Rose: My FanTime account says otherwise, honey.
Carmella: Don’t flatter yourself, anybody could make it out there. I’d be a billionaire if I decided to cash in on my lovely derriere!
Mandy Rose: Certainly beats seeing your front face and the various and horrible jobs they did on you, horseface.
Carmella: You bitch!
Pat McAfee: Oh-oh, it looks like Carmella wants to settle this in the ring.
 
Michael Cole: She might not get the chance… Look who’s there behind her! Gigi Dolin and Jacey Jane, Mandy’s former partners in Toxic Attraction!
Mandy Rose: Girls, girls! It’s alright! Let her come, let her do her thing. Carmella wants a little attention, so let’s give her what she craves for. And, more importantly, let’s give all of you a little taste of what Mandy Rose can really do. After all, I didn’t come back just so that a few thousand people could say ‘I was in the same building as the sexiest woman alive’.
Pat McAfee: It looks like this match is on! | 54
MANDY ROSE vs CARMELLA
vs
Melissa Santos: The following contest is settled for one fall. Introducing first, representing Toxic Attraction… from Yorktown Heights, New York… She is the Sexiest Woman Alive… Mandy Rose!
Michael Cole: Well, Pat, this is a rather unexpected turn of events. I think you have to admire Mandy’s confidence for mentioning her FanTime account on live television but realistically, how far can she go?
Pat McAfee: There will be a bit of ring rust to shake off but if I’m being honest, I think Mandy Rose would have been a huge star twenty years ago. Now, I can’t really see her competing with the likes of Becky Lynch or Ronda Rousey.
Melissa Santos: And her opponent… already in the ring… ‘The Staten Island Princess’… Carmella!
Michael Cole: Carmella is another woman who invests a lot of pride in her appearance but unfortunately for her, wins have been few and far between recently.
Pat McAfee: She’s been hovering around the Women’s Tag Team title but you are correct. She’s been on a downward trajectory since she won the SmackDown Women’s Championship and she probably feels threatened by Mandy Rose’s return.
Michael Cole: A loss on her first appearance on SmackDown for a year would be disastrous for Mandy Rose and right off the starting blocks, Carmella tries to hit her Mella Buster but Mandy pushes her away and wisely rolls out of the ring.
Pat McAfee: I don’t know what she’s been doing these past few months but she probably wants the pace to be as slow as possible.
Michael Cole: Carmella is daring her opponent to get back in the ring but Mandy grabbed her ankle and pulls her outside, where she’s greeted by a forearm to the face. Oh! And she delivers a back suplex onto the apron! Devastating blow to Carmella, this early in the match. Oh, my! Did you hear that sound? Mandy Rose just catapulted Carmella headfirst into the steel step, proving she hasn’t lost a step in her absence.
Pat McAfee: Poor Carmella can’t catch a break at the moment. And things are about to get worse as Gigi Dolin and Jacey Jane are coming closer.
Michael Cole: The referee is asking them to move out while Mandy is throwing Carmella back in the ring. She’s keeping her inside the ropes… Oh, no! I think she’s going to hit the Bed of Roses on the apron… but Carmella, acting on instinct, managed to counter with a back body drop, despite being tangled in the ropes.
Pat McAfee: She probably saved herself from a concussion there!
Michael Cole: She frees herself and she continues her flurry of offense with a huge lariat. Mandy Rose goes down. Now, she smashes Mandy’s face against the turnbuckle. A couple of huge chops to boot… My God, Carmella is on fire! And the rapid corner elbow strikes send Mandy crashing down. Suddenly, Mandy Rose doesn’t look so confident!
Pat McAfee: She’s running on adrenaline but this could be her chance to finally break out of her rotten run!
Michael Cole: Hold a second… Mandy is… crying? Well, that's unexpected. I think she’s begging the referee to stop this match but Carmella is having none of it. A little bit of hair pulling here by the Princess of Staten Island… Oh! Mandy Rose with a thumb to the eye! Chip Danning couldn’t see it! Rose sends Carmella for the ride… and she connects with the Kiss the Rose! Game over! 1… 2… 3! It’s done. Mandy Rose makes a winning return to SmackDown at Carmella’s expenses but if this is a sign of things to come, she’s still as devilish as she is beautiful.
Pat McAfee: She obviously thinks she has something to gain here or she wouldn’t have bothered to come back in the first place but what is her endgame, I have to admit I have no idea.
Winner by pinfall: Mandy Rose in 5:05 | 53
THE IMPERIUM WANT MORE
[Backstage, The Imperium are having a meeting in Gunther’s dressing room. There is a bottle of champagne on the table, three glasses and (of course) a loudspeaker is playing Wagner.]
Gunther: My friends, we are on the verge of changing this show for ever. For this reason, I arranged this little… celebration. You see, winning that title was only the first step. We have much work ahead of us.
Ludwig Kaiser: You know you can rely on us to carry out your orders, General.
Gunther: The first thing will be to get rid of that incompetent General Manager, Herr Pearce. I will take care of that as soon as I’m done with whoever he choses to challenge me. The next order of business will be to have this hideous belt replaced. I’m ashamed to be seen with that piece of silverware. ‘Universal Championship’… what kind of a stupid name is that? I’ll make sure this belt goes away and is replaced with someone with a bit more lineage.
Valhalla: This isn’t a good idea. I carried out seid and the spirits have told me that if you change that belt, you will lose it soon.
[Gunther slaps her down as soon as she’s done talking.]
Gunther: And did your precious spirits tell you about this, too? They only have bad news for me but from where I’m standing, I seem to be doing pretty well. By all means, keep me informed of your visions. They make for a good distraction but you need to learn when to shut that mouth of yours, wench.
[All the while, Kaiser and Vinci are sneering.]
Gunther: Which brings me to the next order of business. We need to have all the gold in order to cement our legacy. That is something Reigns and his lot could never achieve. So, you are going to bring me the Intercontinental Championship. Edge is an old man and he’s been hugging that belt for far long than he had any right to. Relieving him of that title will be an act of mercy. I don’t care how you do it. Just make sure to get it done.
Ludwig Kaiser: It will be as you command, my General.
Gunther: As it shall be. | 79
JACOB FATU IS UNWORTHY
Kayla Braxton: Please welcome my guests at this time, The Bloodline. Jimmy, last week on SmackDown, your cousin Jacob Fatu spoiled your celebrations as the new head of the table and challenged you. What are your thoughts on the current situation?
Trinity Fatu: Look, I’d like to say a word. Everybody knows my husband has had problems in the past. It’s no secret. But Jacob is different. He’s a criminal. And he’s not a real wrestler! He only got into the business because of his last name and because his father tried to keep him out of trouble. He doesn’t deserve to be the head of the table. He should be feeding off our scraps!
Jimmy Uso: Word! Yo Uce, my wife, she’s saying the truth. Jacob, he ain’t one of us, not really. He’s got business challenging me. I won that title fair and square. I know what people say, Kayla. I don’t live under a rock. I know most people think I’m just the ‘other brother’ but this is my chance to prove them wrong.
Kayla Braxton: So, you’re going to accept Jacob’s challenge?
Jey Uso: Yo, have you been listening or what? Of course, he won’t! Listen, I’m not happy with the way Jimmy won that triple threat match but he ain’t no Jacob Fatu. Jacob’s nothing but a troublemaker. He thinks he’s big because he was a champion in a Mickey Mouse promotion but he’s got no business challenging my brother.
Kayla Braxton: What about you, Solo? What do you make of Jacob’s challenge?
Solo Sikoa: …
Kayla Braxton: So you all are just going to… ignore him?
Solo Sikoa: I’ll fight him.
[Sikoa leaves as the rest of the Bloodline glance puzzled looks at him behind his back.] | 70
DAMIAN PRIEST AND KARRION KROSS vs XAVIER WOODS AND KOFI KINGSTON
Melissa Santos: The following contest is a tag team match set for one fall. Introducing first, accompanied to the ring by the Judgement Day… first, from New York City, New York… weighing in at 249 pounds… Damian Priest! And his tag team partner… from Sin City… weighing in at 265 pounds… Karrion Kross!
Michael Cole: Just when you think the Bloodline may have finally turned a corner, another crisis breaks out. Their internal strife will have to take a backseat for the moment though, as the Judgement Day are about to be judged themselves.
Pat McAfee: The fact that they are sending their two heavyweights in this battle tells you everything you need about their feud with the New Day. Nobody is taking any prisoners tonight.
Melissa Santos: And their opponents… making their way to the ring… at a combined weight of 702 pounds… Kofi Kingston… Xavier Woods… The New Day!
Michael Cole: No smiles, no pancakes, no clapping… Kingston and Woods are here for one thing and one thing only – they want to make the Judgement Day pay for what they’ve done to Big E.
Pat McAfee: They have every reason to be pissed off. The Judgement Day had absolutely no reason to attack him, particularly on his return and they did so in the most shocking and violent way possible. Now, it’s time for them to face the consequences of their actions.
Michael Cole: There’s a lot of tension and animosity in the air as this matchup kicks off. Karrion Kross and Kofi Kingston will get things underway and the former is using his superior strength to get the upper hand and lock in a side headlock on Kingston. Kingston sends Kross running… Oh! Wow! Did you see that? Kross hit him back with a shoulder tackle and Kingston literally bumped all the way across the ring!
Pat McAfee: Kross looks like an average Joe until you get close to him. Only then do you realise how tall and powerful he really is.
Michael Cole: Some might add heartless to that list. He’s hardly said a word since AJ Styles threw him off a window in Canada a couple of months ago but he’s been absolutely dominant. Kross has Kingston in the ropes but he will have to break that hold soon if he doesn’t want to get disqualified. And the referee has no choice but to push him away… Oh, come on! Scarlett at ringside is scratching Kofi’s eyes while the referee had his back turned!
Pat McAfee: I was worried the Judgement Day would use their numbers in order to tip the balance in their favour. It would take a whole team of referees to keep them in check.
Michael Cole: Meanwhile, Kross picks up Kingston and rams him into the corner and a series of turnbuckle thrusts turn Kingston inside out. In comes Priest now for the first time in this matchup. He comes in with a punch but Kingston ducks him… Oh my God! SOS! SOS on Kross but he’s still standing! He’s reeling against the ropes though! Kingston connects with a standing dropkick and he finally goes down and out! Kingston is looking to do more damage… Are you kidding me! He’s got eyes on the back of his head! He felt Priest coming up behind him and hit a springboard DDT out of nowhere!
Pat McAfee: Just when think you’ve seen it all, Kofi conjures up a magic moment! What an athlete! Michael Cole: Woods knows what he’s got to do… A rebound off the ropes… Tope con hilo! He took out Kross and Gallows in one swift move! The seven-time SmackDown Tag Team champions haven’t lost a step! Kingston is making another pass at Priest… Oh, but he ran straight into a big boot. And just like that, Damian Priest killed any momentum that the New Day had.
Pat McAfee: It’s easy to get below the radar in all the chaos the Judgement Day are creating but Priest is a bona fide mean bastard and he’s got the muscle and the athletic ability to make good on most of his threats.
Michael Cole: Priest is unloading on the unfortunate Kingston, who’s been in the ring since the beginning of this match. And he puts the exclamation point with a lifted flatliner! The Judgement Day are in complete control and you have to wonder if anyone will ever be able to put an end to their spree of destruction. Kingston bravely gets up but Priest was ready for him… corkscrew roundhouse kick… Oh! Kingston got out of the way! Priest just took out referee Will Charlton!
Pat McAfee: Poor guy didn’t even see it coming!
Michael Cole: Xavier Woods takes advantage of the confusion to get back in the ring… and he hits the target with a jumping high knee! Right on the kisser! Woods is going upstairs now and he connects with a tight rope elbow drop! Woods is relatively fresh at this point… this could a game-changer! Kingston is getting back up… backbreaker on Priest… Woods is on the top turnbuckle again… Midnight Hour! They completely dismantled him in a matter of seconds but there’s no referee to make the count!
Pat McAfee: They can’t afford to dwell on that. They have to keep the pressure on if they want to get away with anything from this match… or even make it out of the ring on their own two feet.
Michael Cole: They’re considering their options… Oh, my God! Karrion Kross came back from out of nowhere and downed Kingston with the Time’s Up, one of his many finishing manoeuvres! Woods is looking dumbfounded but he still manages to evade a big right hand from Kross. Superkick from Woods but Kross seems unaffected… another… and another…
Pat McAfee: This guy isn’t human! It’s crazy!
Michael Cole: This time, he finally drops to the floor! This could be the opening the New Day have been waiting for. Woods check on Gallows and Scarlett at ringside but they’re standing still. Off the ropes he goes… and he connects with the Lost in the Woods!
Pat McAfee: Kross’ head bounced hard against the mat but, once again, there’s nobody to make the count. They should be sending another referee if he can’t wake up, dammit!
Michael Cole: There are bodies everywhere – Kingston is out, Priest is out, the referee is out and Karrion Kross isn’t faring much better. You have to wonder though if a simple win could be enough quench the New Day’s thirst for revenge. Woods, with a grim look on his face, is pushing Kross outside the ring. What does he have in mind here? Hey, look out! Woods is clearing our announce table and I think I know where this is going.
Pat McAfee: He can’t do that! It’s too dangerous!
Michael Cole: He’s going for another tight rope elbow drop but from 15 feet high! He’s setting up… Noooo! My God, I can’t believe it! Gallows caught Woods in mid-air and he squashed him on the concrete with a Gallows Pole! What a sickening sound! It’s horrible! And this match is over. Gallows is casually throwing Woods’ carcass back inside and drags Priest across… My goodness, is there anyone out there to end this madness? Gallows grabs the referee’s arm and makes the count… 1… 2… 3. It’s over.
Winners by pinfall: Damian Priest and Karrion Kross in 7:59 | 74
PUNISHMENT DAY
Pat McAfee: No, I’m afraid it’s not.
Michael Cole: Oh, no. Kross and Gallows are trapping Woods inside the ropes while Priest… what does he have here? It’s… it’s a turnscrew.
Pat McAfee: And look who’s here now…
Michael Cole: I don’t believe it. Now that the fight is over, here comes Dominik Mysterio.
Dominik Mysterio: Hey, guys! Shut up! Please, shut up, you’re going to miss a good one. Who am I? [Mysterio takes the mic in his mouth and slowly turns his head left and right.] Big E driving a car! Ok, ok. I understand you’re not too happy with what you did to your boy. You want an explanation. Some closure. I’ll be honest, we did that because we wanted to help Big E. Now, he’s got the best parking spots!
Michael Cole: Oh, my God… somebody, please stop this.
Damian Priest: Big E has been judged. For over a hear, he was happy to collect a pay check while lying on a bed. He did absolutely nothing. He just waited for his injury to heal, ‘naturally’. And when he finally comes back, you – yes, you people – give him a hero’s welcome. Sorry, that’s not something we can agree with.
[Scarlett pours a bottle of water on Woods to wake him up.]
Scarlett: If you had accepted his fate, it would have been easier. Now, we have to punish another one of you. Let it be a lesson for you, Xavier Woods. Tonight, we’re taking your friend’s wings. He will never fly again.
Pat McAfee: They are completely off their collective rocker… People are too afraid to do anything about it.
Michael Cole: I don’t like this at all… Someone has to do something. Oh, my God, no! Damian Priest just drove that turnscrew through Kofi’s knee! Can you hear that wail? This isn’t wrestling, it’s just barbarism on live television!
Pat McAfee: I don’t know what’s worse, Kofi’s screams of agony or Dominik’s stupid smile. They don’t even realise how far they are going. It’s just a game for them!
Michael Cole: It looks like they’re getting away with everything so far. And of course, Dominik has to kick a man down and attack Woods while he can’t defend himself. I’m going to be sick. What now? Scarlett! Scarlett blew one of her fiery kisses to Kingston but he couldn’t protect himself! His hair is on fire! The paramedics are rushing in now and the Judgement Day finally leave the premises, after yet another revolting show of strength. | 67
MORE DOM
[Back from the break, Corey graves is standing by backstage with Dominik Mysterio and Luke Gallows.]
Corey Graves: Welcome back everyone. First, we have an update on Kofi Kingston’s condition. He’s been taken to a local medical facility but the doctors say he’s doing very well given the circumstances. Now, I’m with two of the people responsible for all this chaos, Dominik Mysterio and Luke Gallows. My first question is a simple one: why?
Dominik Mysterio: Well, because we could. Or maybe because we want Woods to join in. How cool would that be? Would you like to have a new playmate, Luke? [Gallows remains expressionless.] Never mind.
Corey Graves: Dom, you’re acting like you don’t have a care in the world but don’t you think that, perhaps, you’re stretching yourself a little thin. You’re trying to destroy the New Day while feuding with Cody Rhodes. Isn’t that a bit much?
Dominik Mysterio: Look, I’m not your typical third generation superstar, okay? I’ve had a traumatic childhood. I didn’t even know who my real father was and when I did find out, it turns out I’m the son of a deadbeat and the cool guy is just a ‘friend of the family’. Thanks, mom. Now, let me tell you something: I am the biggest star on this show and I owe it to nobody but myself. Yes, unlike some people – people like Cody Rhodes – I wasn’t handed everything on a silver platter. Because, guess what, being the son of a loser doesn’t open any doors. So, you want to know if I have something to do with what happened to him in San Antonio? Damn right, I do. I paid some people to make him understand he wasn’t wanted here. Maybe they went a little too far but that happens all the time in jail. That’s something else my deadbeat parents should have thought about when they locked me away! You meet all kind of people in jail. This show, it’s my territory and I won’t let a so-called ‘wrestling royalty’ like Cody Rhodes take it away from me.
Corey Graves: You seem to be taking this very personally.
Dominik Mysterio: Yeah, we’ll see how you take this when my boy Luke Gallows destroy your pal Cody Rhodes next week.
[Mysterio and Gallows walk away, leaving Graves facing the camera with a blank expression on his face.] | 61
SHEAMUS WANTS A TITLE MATCH
[The director is about to get back to ringside when Sheamus shows up.]
Sheamus: Hey Corey, what’s up mate? Don’t tell me somebody stood you up in the middle of an interview!
Corey Graves: I’m used to it by now.
Sheamus: Ha! Let your experience be a cautionary tale for all wannabe-superstars who’d consider becoming a broadcast journalist! Nah, I’m kidding mate. I’m here to help you out because it so happens that I have something to say.
Corey Graves: Let’s hear it then.
Sheamus: Last week on SmackDown, Edge defended his Intercontinental Championship against Powerhouse Hobbs. Good for him, I say but I also say: who the hell is Powerhouse Hobbs? Did he win a tournament to become the number one contender? Is a former World Heavyweight champion? First time I heard his name was three months ago! See where I’m going with this? All I ask for is a chance to win that bloody title so that I can retire in peace! Is it too much? My neck’s ruined, my shoulder’s ruined but all I want is just one match. They used to give them away as a curtesy when I arrived. Is it…
[Sheamus stops mid-sentence when Ally Kat comes by and starts rubbing herself against his and Graves’ legs before walking away.]
Sheamus: What the hell was that?!
Corey Graves: Er, she’s a new signing…
Sheamus: Are you kidding me?
Drake Maverick: Don’t answer that question, Corey! Sheamus, I heard your rant and let me tell you, I know just the man to sort that out for you.
Sheamus: Who is it?
Drake Maverick: Me.
Sheamus: What? You can’t even sort out your own career! You think I need a glorified cheerleader blowing his whistle at ringside when I fight?
Drake Maverick: I see you’re a glass half-empty kind of person because when you put it like that, it doesn’t sound very appealing but…
Sheamus: There’s not ‘but’ here! You got that idiot Mahan fired! That’s not what I’m looking for here!
Drake Maverick: I’ve got nothing to do with that! Listen, we crossed the ocean together. I promise you I can get you that title and a lot more than that too. Trust me, you won’t regret it.
Sheamus: Alright. I’ll probably kick me own arse for that I’m feeling generous. I will give you one chance. Don’t blow it.
[Sheamus walks away, leaving Mavrick and Graves alone. Maverick looks expectantly at Graves, obviously hoping for an interview but Graves just sighs and walks away too.] | 63
JACOB FATU vs SOLO SIKOA
vs 
Melissa Santos: The following contest is set for one fall. Introducing first… accompanied to the ring by Jimmy and Jey, The Usos… from the Mist of Samoa… weighing in at 279 pounds… ‘The Samoan Werewolf’… Jacob Fatu!
Michael Cole: Jacob Fatu is about to make his competitive debut on SmackDown against his own cousin but this isn’t exactly the matchup he was looking for.
Pat McAfee: He’s got nothing to gain from such a fight but he doesn’t strike me as the calculating type either. Jacob Fatu usually just tears through everything in his path and asks questions later.
Melissa Santos: And his opponent… making his way to the ring… from Las Vegas, Nevada… weighing in at 250 pounds… He is ‘The Champion of the Island’… Solo Sikoa!
Michael Cole: More family strife coming the Usos way, Pat. Is there anyone out there who can lead this family back to greatness?
Pat McAfee: Jimmy thinks he’s the man but it’s quite obvious that he doesn’t command the same level of respect as Roman Reigns did. They wanted something different, they got Jimmy and now it looks like nobody will give him a chance. If Solo wins tonight, do you think he will just step back in line?
Michael Cole: This promises to be an intriguing matchup between two powerful… and it looks like Sikoa isn’t going to wait for the bell! He caught Jacob Fatu unaware with that vicious European uppercut. Ryan Tran quickly pushes him back, that was very brave of him. Now that order is restored the match can get underway… Oh, wow! Fatu’s right hook landed right on Sikoa’s temple and down goes the champion of the island!
Pat McAfee: This isn’t about strategy or targeting a particular area; he just wanted to send a message: hurt me and I’ll hurt you more.
Michael Cole: Sikoa is back on his feet and looking for a test of strength… but Fatu has no interest in that and he hits another powerful punch right on the button. A kick right to the gut… he’s looking for a suplex but Sikoa is blocking it. Headbutt by Fatu… Death Valley Driver! And wisely, Sikoa rolls out of the ring.
Pat McAfee: Fatu’s roar is a testament to his feral nature but Sikoa’s no pushover. This is just the beginning.
Michael Cole: Jimmy and Jey obviously have a few words of advice or encouragement for their cousin but… Hey! Watch out! Spaceman plancha from Fatu! He took out all three brothers in one swift move! Fatu leaps back on his feet and so does this crowd! He’s been very impressive so far in this matchup. Sikoa really needs to get his act together or this could be a very short match indeed but for now, he’s being thrown casually through the ropes. Fatu follows up… and he connects with a guillotine leg drop!
Pat McAfee: Sikoa was the enforcer of the Bloodline but Fatu is different – he’s more like a destroyer.
Michael Cole: He’s been absolutely dominant so far. Fatu with the cover… 1… 2… and a kick out. He’s taking a few steps back, literally daring Solo to come at him. You have to feel extremely confident to give your opponent that kind of opportunity. Sikoa runs at him… dodges another right hand… bounces off the ropes… and he gets caught by a spinout slam! My God, Fatu planted him head first into the mat!
Pat McAfee: Imagine doing that to your own cousin. Jacob Fatu is as vicious and savage as they come and you have to wonder if anyone in the Bloodline has what it takes to stop him.
Michael Cole: Fatu, stalking his prey, is waiting for Sikoa to get back on his feet… Somersault dropkick… but there’s nobody home and for the first time since the bell rang, Solo Sikoa gets an opening! And he connects with a superkick! Fatu is down! Fatu is down! But… Solo decided not to go for the pin. Instead, he’s looking for something under the ring but this isn’t a stipulation match. What is he…?
Pat McAfee: There’s a door under the ring? Who put that there?
Michael Cole: Jimmy and Jey are urging Solo to end this. It’s probably a sound advice: it looks like Fatu’s demolition work has taken a toll on him. Sikoa is picking up Fatu… Samoan Spike! But Fatu ducked it! Pop-up Samoan drop! Jacob Fatu was playing possum and Solo fell right into his trap. Oh-oh, Jey considered moving in to help his brother but the look in Jacob’s eyes convinced him otherwise. Fatu goes to the corner… double springboard… Mighty Moonsault! He squashed Solo like a bug! 1… 2… 3! It’s over!
Pat McAfee: He made short work of his cousin and now the Usos have another problem on their hands.
Winner by pinfall: Jacob Fatu in 6:14 | 61
STRANGE BEDFELLOWS
[Backstage, Sasha Banks is obviously looking for someone. She turns a corner and finds Ronda Rousey, who immediately assumes a fighting stance.]
Sasha Banks: Whoa! Easy tiger! You don’t like me, I don’t like you. I get it but I didn’t come here to fight.
Ronda Rousey: Then you should have stayed at home. Come to think of it, if you had done that eleven years ago, it would have been easier for everybody.
Sasha Banks: Yeah, you’re a real badass. Until you lose a match and you take your ball and go home, that is.
Ronda Rousey: I don’t recall you ever beating me so how would you know about that?
Sasha Banks: Alright, I’ll have to be the bigger woman here and drop this stupid bickering. You’re barking at the wrong tree, Ronda. We both want the same thing: the SmackDown Women’s Championship.
Ronda Rousey: No kidding! You found that on your own, genius?
Sasha Banks: Quite that attitude for a moment and think about it. Together, we can end Becky’s reign and then we can fight for the title.
Ronda Rousey: Ha! I don’t need you to do that and if you want to challenge me once I’m done with Lynch… well, it’s your funeral.
[Rousey turns around and begins to leave but Banks grabs her by the arm. The two of them stare intently at each other.]
Sasha Banks: There’s a misunderstanding. You don’t get to turn me down.
[Rousey pulls free.]
Ronda Rousey: Don’t you ever put your hands on me ever again. Is that clear enough for you.
[Banks looks furious as Rousey walks away.] | 76
RUN-IN
Melissa Santos: The following contest is set for one fall. Introducing first, from The Caribbean… weighing in at 240 pounds… Carlito!
Michael Cole: The audacity of this man… after coming back to the WWE a few weeks ago, Carlito has been cheating his way up the ranks without a second thought. Don’t get me wrong, he’s got a lot of talent but unfortunately, he doesn’t have a personality to match that.
Pat McAfee: If you ask me, he’s a rotten apple. Spitting in the face of his opponents has become his trademark over the years. A lot of people used to think he was cool, now he just looks like a bitter old pro who wants to do his shtick one time too many.
Melissa Santos: And his opponent… making his way to the ring… from Pittsburgh, Penn… Oh, my God!
Michael Cole: Watch out! That’s Richard Holliday attacking Elias from behind!
Pat McAfee: What a scumbag! What’s his problem?
Michael Cole: Carlito and Holliday have been working together recently and they hold a victory over the Street Profits, the tag team champions. Elias didn’t see him coming and now he’s paying the price… Market crash on the steel ramp!
Pat McAfee: This match isn’t even officially started!
Michael Cole: It might never start at this rate! He’s going to… No! No! Piledriver! Of all the cowardly… and now, of course, Holliday is dragging Elias to the ring, feeding him to his partner in crime Carlito. It’s revolting! | 65
CARLITO vs ELIAS
vs 
Pat McAfee: Ok, I’m going to be blunt here but I think Adam Pearce is way too obsessed with Gunther at the moment. Gunther is by no means a nice guy, but it’s been one interference after the other tonight. Pearce needs to stamp his authority on this show! This is turning into a joke!
Michael Cole: The referee is checking on Elias but it looks like this match is going to happen regardless of that vicious attack by Richard Holliday. He calls for the bell and… oh, of course… Carlito had to spit that apple in his face. Oh! But Elias hits back with a jawbreaker!
Pat McAfee: Seeing Carlito eat through a straw for a couple of months would be a breath of fresh air.
Michael Cole: After the beating he received at Holliday’s hands, Elias needs to pull all the stops and finish this as quickly as possible. He’s going upstairs… Oh, no! Come on! Holliday’s grabbing his foot! The referee orders him to back away but that distraction was enough to allow Carlito to recover… Watch out! Oh, my God! Carlito pushed Elias and sent him crashing down, headfirst into the barricade! And look at Carlito and Holliday! They seem proud of themselves!
Pat McAfee: Holliday fancies himself as a sophisticated businessman but he’s nothing more than a common thug! Teaming up against a single opponent is not cool!
Michael Cole: Holliday throws him back into the ring. This is practically a two-on-one handicap match at this stage. Carlito is waiting for him… Bad Apple! Carlito goes for the cover… but Elias rolls him up! 1… and a kick out. Superkick from Elias… but Carlito blocks it… Oh! Carlito transitioned into a Cool Shot, planting Elias’ head into the mat with that elevated flatliner!
Pat McAfee: I think you have to give Elias some credit here. He keeps on fighting despite Carlito’s and Holliday’s shenanigans.
Michael Cole: Carlito is as arrogant and cocky as they come… He’s just stepping on Elias’ shoulder for the pin… but Elias transitions into a kneebar… Are we about to see a massive upset here? No, a kick to the face sets Carlito free! Both men are back to a vertical base… Oh! What an explosive clothesline from Elias! He really turned Carlito inside out here!
Pat McAfee: That’s the kind of resilience and athleticism that makes me an Elias believer! He’s got everything you need to make it to the top of the wrestling industry.
Michael Cole: Everything… except friends. He’s always been something of a loner – his duo with Rick Boogs didn’t last long. Not having any back-up when you deal with Holliday and Carlito could prove a major disadvantage. Meanwhile, Elias continues to push on… Oh! What a backbreaker! And this could be it… No! Carlito kicks out at two.
Pat McAfee: Elias must be wondering what he’s got to do in order to put Carlito away. He also has to keep an eye out for Holliday at ringside, which doesn’t make his task any easier.
Michael Cole: Elias with a big right hand… but there’s nobody home and Carlito hits back with a superkick! Did you see that? Right on the button and Elias drops like a ton of bricks! Carlito is stomping away at Elias, trying to bury him into the mat… Elias rolls away, leaps back on his feet… He’s going for the spear… Oh, no! Carlito saw him coming and he tossed him halfway across the ring with a released German suplex!
Pat McAfee: What does Carlito need to talk to the referee for? Hey! Holliday is using the ropes to choke Elias! How many times does he have to interfere in this matchup? Michael Cole: Carlito knows his new business partner is doing his dirty work. Look at him, taunting the crowd. Just how vain can you be. Elias still has some fight left in him… he’s daring Carlito to come at him again… and he does, with another superkick! Carlito gets Elias in a vertical position… Stalling whiplash!
Pat McAfee: Carlito is a master of the swinging neckbreaker and that’s why Holliday’s run-in earlier was so devastating. He drew a target on Elias’ neck.
Michael Cole: You have to wonder what their endgame is, though. So far, they’ve been antagonising everybody they came across but they didn’t ask for a title match after beating the Street Profits. They seem happy causing as much chaos as they can. Speaking of which, Carlito is in position for the backstabber… but Elias counters with a thunderous discus clothesline! That knocked the wind off Carlito’s sails! Elias is going to the top turnbuckle… He’s probably looking for his trademark elbow drop… The referee has his eyes locked on Holliday… Elias lifts off… Oh, no! Carlito raised his knees at the last second! Elias may have dislocated his shoulder! And Carlito, always the opportunist, is now getting ready… Backstabber! 1… 2… 3. This match is over.
Pat McAfee: It was always going to be an uphill battle after that cowardly attack by Holliday early on but to his credit, Elias fought like a lion. On a different, the result would have been different.
Winner by pinfall: Carlito in 7:18 | 59
LOOKING FOR VOLUNTEERS
[Meanwhile, Adam Pearce is having a meeting in his office with various from the different teams and stables.]
Adam Pearce: Thank you for being here. I will get straight to the point: I don’t think Gunther is the man we want to represent the SmackDown brand. I think this is something we can all agree on. Therefore, I’d like to set up a series of qualifying matches for a six-pack challenge match that will take place at Extreme Rules. In a spirit of cooperation, I wanted to give each and everyone of you an opportunity to express your interest. So, what do you all say?
JBL: Adam, let me be the first to say that I, like pretty much everyone else here I assume, have no respect for you whatsoever. You didn’t make it as a wrestler and you suck at being a General Manager too. But… I’m not one to look a gift horse in the mouth. You need someone to take over Gunther? Powerhouse Hobbs is your man.
Jimmy Uso: Yo, Uce, you talk a big game but last time I checked, your boy was put to sleep by Edge. So, maybe you should just say ‘thank you, Sir’ and shut your trap, old man. This title belongs to The Bloodline Uce so you were right to invite us. As the tribal chief, I accept the invitation. Yessir.
Montez Ford: You ain’t serious man, are you? Could be, you’re not even the tribal chief a week from now! You’re on borrowed time: you know it, we know it and he knows it! Two weeks ago, you were the guy who yelled ‘yessir’ and ‘nosir’ when your brother was talking! We, on the other hand, are the SmackDown Tag Team champions and since we’re unchallenged… I say we’d make a fine Universal champion. What do you think, dawg?
Angelo Dawkins: Yessir!
[Jimmy jumps from his armchair, ready to fight but Pearce tries to calm him down.]
Adam Pearce: Gentlemen, please! You’ll get the chance to settle your differences in the ring soon enough. Let’s keep this meeting civil. What about you, Scarlett?
Scarlett: What’s in it for us?
Adam Pearce: I beg your pardon? One member of the Judgement Day could be getting a title shot. I thought I made myself clear.
Scarlett: We want more.
Adam Pearce: I’m afraid that’s all I have to offer.
Scarlett: Mister Pearce, you’re a very poor poker player. It’s obvious that you’re a desperate man and if you want the Judgement Day to take your offer seriously, you will have to go the extra mile.
Adam Pearce: I think you’re misreading the situation. You’re lucky I’m too busy with Gunther at the moment but Dominik Mysterio will probably end up in jail sooner rather than later. You’re in no position to bargain.
Scarlett: We will see about that.
Adam Pearce: What about you?
[The camera pans to the left where Xavier Woods is standing in a corner, a dark expression on his face.]
Xavier Woods: [Pointing at Scarlett.] If they’re in, we’re in. Otherwise, no deal.
Adam Pearce: Alright. Thank you all for coming and listening to my idea. We’ll be in touch and I’m sure we can work something out that will be to our benefit and the benefit of the SmackDown audience. | 66
EDGE IS RUNNING OUT OF TIME
Michael Cole: It seems Adam Pearce is willing to step up his search for a worthy challenger for Gunther’s Universal title but that’s a matter for another time. Right now, our broadcast colleague Corey Graves is standing by backstage.
Corey Graves: Thank you, Cole. Please welcome my guest at this time, the Rated R Superstar, Edge. Edge, last week on SmackDown, you successfully defended your Intercontinental Championship against Powerhouse Hobbs. How long can you keep going?
Edge: Realistically… not very long. I’ll turn 50 next month and if I’m being honest with you, I have no right to be beating some of these athletes who are in their prime. If I do, it’s only because I can rely on two things they don’t have: experience and grit. But sooner or later, that won’t be enough.
Corey Graves: Do you feel time is finally catching up with you?
Edge: It takes longer to recover after each match. Every time I step in this ring, I take a trip into the unknown. I have no idea what’s going to happen. This title is the last one I will ever hold. I’ve come back from the dead and I think I don’t have anything left to prove. Once I’m done, I’ll have a few dream matches to look forward and then it will be time for me to enjoy my time with my family.
Corey Graves: Who’s going to take this belt off you, then?
Edge: Someone who deserves it. That’s the only thing I can guarantee you: I won’t go down easily. That’s my message to the rest of the roster: if you want to put your hands on this, you’ll have to fight for it and you’d better bring on your A game because there’s no freebies in this business.
Corey Graves: Aren’t you afraid that the prospect of retiring a legend will only increase the competition?
Edge: I’m looking forward to it.
Corey Graves: Well, thank you for your time and good luck for what’s coming next. | 69
THE CHAMPIONS’ LAST WORDS
Michael Cole: Losing a legend like Edge is a grim thought. It feels like he’s been around for ever. However, he’s not the only champion with no shortage of challengers: the Women’s Tag Team champions Liv Morgan and Raquel Rodriguez are about to defend their belts for the second time this month. Earlier today, they had this to say.
Kayla Braxton: Liv, Raquel, first thank you for taking a little time off your busy schedule. Later tonight, you’re going to defend your Women’s Tag Team Championship against Piper Niven and Cora Jade. How do you feel about your chances of retaining?
Raquel Rodriguez: It’s a much tougher challenge that awaits us but Liv and I have been working our asses off to make sure nobody will be able to take these babies away from us. I’ll be honest with you: when I first saw Liv, I wasn’t sure she had the work ethics I’m looking for in a partner. Turns out I was completely wrong.
Liv Morgan: You know, the women’s division is actually a tough one because there’s only one main title on each brand. If you’re not in the title picture, you’re an also-ran. This Tag Team Championship is an opportunity to make a name for ourselves and show that we’re not here to make the numbers.
Kayla Braxton: This isn’t the first time you’re in a tag team, Liv.
Liv Morgan: I haven’t had the best of lucks with my partner so far but Raquel is different. She’s just as ambitious as I am. When I broke out on the WWE scene, as I considered as something of a joke. They didn’t take me seriously but I jumped every hurdle on the way and now, here I am.
Raquel Rodriguez: Look, Kayla, we know this run won’t last for ever and one day or another, we will have to go our separate ways. But for the moment, we’re learning as much as we can from each other and this will make us stronger when the times come for us to return to singles competition.
Liv Morgan: Hopefully, that won’t be tonight!
Raquel Rodriguez: We’ll make sure it doesn’t happen too soon!
Kayla Braxton: Ladies, thanks again for your time and good luck for tonight’s match. | 67
CORA JADE AND PIPER NIVEN vs LIV MORGAN AND RAQUEL RODRIGUEZ (WOMEN'S TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP)
Melissa Santos: The following contest is set for one fall and it for the Women’s Tag Team Championship. Introducing first, the challengers… from Chicago, Illinois… Cora Jade! And her tag team partner… from Ayrshire, Scotland… Piper Niven!
Michael Cole: Here come the challengers from RAW and don’t let their lack of experience as a tag team fool you – these ladies have set their sights on the Women’s Tag Team Championship and they will pull every stop to get what they want.
Pat McAfee: Piper Niven has already expressed her frustration at what she perceives as a lack of championship opportunities despite her strong win/loss record. Cora Jade has just made the grade from NXT but they offer an interesting combination of strength and quickness.
Melissa Santos: And their opponents… they are the Women’s Tag Team champions… first, from Elmwood Park, New Jersey… Liv Morgan! And her tag team partner… from Rio Grande Valley, Texas… Raquel Rodriguez!
Michael Cole: Liv and Raquel beat Ronda Rousey and Shayna Baszler at SummerSlam in order to win these belts and, so far, they have been ruling supreme on what is, admittedly, a very thin tag team division.
Pat McAfee: You can only beat the teams you face and so far, Liv and Raquel have done just that. Niven and Cora Jade present a different kind of challenge but they aren’t any tougher than Ronda and Shayna were. I still think that if they are at their best, they should come out on top.
Michael Cole: We will soon find out. Raquel Rodriguez and Piper Niven will get things started and they immediately lock up in the centre of the ring. And the Scottish superstar is winning this first test of strength, which is no mean feat when you know what Raquel is capable of. And a big left hand sends Rodriguez on the ground.
Pat McAfee: Niven seems pretty pleased with herself and rightly so but… Oh!
Michael Cole: Did you see that? Rodriguez leapt back on her feet and sent Niven crashing down with a massive clothesline! You can feel there’s an intense rivalry between the two powerhouses of these teams. Rodriguez is tagging out though and Morgan… Oh, my! What a legdrop on Niven, on the hardest part of the ring! Niven crashes at ringside and what a statement from the champions right off the bat.
Pat McAfee: Liv and Raquel are showing that coordination is a very important part of what make a tag team great. If they can take Niven out early on, it will make the challengers’ job more difficult.
Michael Cole: Now it’s Morgan’s turn to brag, daring Niven to get up with these shoot kicks to… Oh, wow! She poked the bear one time too many there! Niven got up and rammed Morgan’s back into the steel post! That sound was absolutely horrible! Morgan’s spine could be broken here. And it looks like this could just be the beginning… Oh, no! No, don’t do that, Piper! Viper Driver on the steel steps! My God!
Pat McAfee: Piper Niven is deceptively quick. People just assume she’s a typical heavyweight but one second is all it takes for her to completely dismantle an opponent – as Liv Morgan is finding out. Michael Cole: Niven is fired up as Raquel Rodriguez looks on that scene of devastation. She’s throwing Morgan back into the ring. Two moves was all it took to swing the momentum in the challengers’ favour and Niven, with a wry smile on her face, tags Cora Jade in but she’s not going to leave without a parting gift, it seems… Viper Bomb! And Jade with a 201 Bomb! New champions! New Champions! 1… 2… 3… No! Rodriguez saves the day at the very last second! That was a close shave! The referee is trying to restore some order inside the ring but Jade doesn’t wait for anybody… Springboard double foot stomp!
Pat McAfee: They are putting Morgan through the grinder here. Niven and Jade have been hitting one big move after the other. Morgan needs a tag out like a fat man needs a diet!
Michael Cole: Jade with the cover… 1… 2… 3… and somehow, some way, Morgan kicks out this time! Incredible! Cora Jade can’t believe it! You have to admire Liv for staying alive after going through such a tremendous amount of punishment in such a short time. Jade is absolutely fuming… She’s going for the Shining Wizard this time… but there’s nobody home! Morgan got out of the way and she hits back with a floating DDT! Where did she get the energy to do that? Both women are down now but Morgan is crawling towards her corner where Rodriguez is eagerly waiting for a tag… and she’s in! Jade is trying to get back up but Rodriguez is already here. What is… Oh, my God! Pat! Look out!
[…]
Michael Cole: Excuse us for the interruption but, as you saw, Raquel Rodriguez just tossed the unfortunate Cora Jade out of the ring and onto our announce table. It’s a warzone here. Paramedics are checking on Jade as we speak but she hasn’t moved since being thrown through the air by the powerful Rodriguez.
Pat McAfee: Looks like Rodriguez is tired of waiting…
Michael Cole: I think she wants another round with Niven! She’s dragging Cora Jade back into the ring and tosses her at Niven’s feet. Amazing show of strength! Niven tags herself in and charges on… Holy…! Raquel Rodriguez turned Niven’s Spear into an Alley Oop Rope Choke!
Pat McAfee: She almost decapitated her opponent here! I can’t see Niven recovering from that blow.
Michael Cole: Raquel Rodriguez is getting ready to finish this. Listen to this crowd! Can she capitalise on all the hard work she’s done so far? Tejana Bomb incoming… No! Piper Niven countered with a back body drop! That’s pure instinct! You can see that Niven is rattled but she’s going to try and rescue this matchup. Niven for the championship… Viper Bomb… Nobody home! Liv Morgan! Liv Morgan pulled her partner out of harm’s way at the last second!
Pat McAfee: What a rollercoaster! Every time someone does enough to pick up the win, something crazy happens and we’re back to square one!
Michael Cole: Morgan drags Rodriguez to her corner, ignoring the referee’s protest. She’s officially in now. Morgan rushes on for the cover… 1… 2… 3… Piper Niven kicks out! What is Morgan doing now? She grabbed Cora Jade’s hand and tagged her in! But… she’s unconscious! She pulls her against the ropes… Oblivion! That’s got to be it! 1… 2… 3! The champions retain!
Pat McAfee: These four went to war and there were casualties! I don’t think you can fault the challengers: they threw everything but the kitchen sink at the champions. At the end of the day, it just wasn’t enough but they came incredibly close to causing a major upset.
Winners by pinfall and still Women's Tag Team champions: Liv Morgan and Raquel Rodriguez in 6:51 | 60
AMBUSH
Michael Cole: Liv Morgan and Raquel Rodriguez live to fight another day though. Switching gears, the SmackDown Women’s champion Becky Lynch is here tonight in West Valley City. What does she have to say? We’ll find out after the break. Stay with us!
[…]
Michael Cole: Ladies and gentlemen, we’re back live on Friday Night SmackDown. Very serious situation developing here as Becky Lynch suffered a vicious attack on her way to the ring. Here’s what happened. As you can see, Becky was going through what we call the ‘Gorilla position’ when she was sucker-punched by Ronda Rousey.
Pat McAfee: I never thought Ronda would stoop that low. That’s absolutely despicable.
Michael Cole: Unfortunately, as you can see on this footage, Becky’s head hit the wall, causing her to bleed quite profusely. The champion started to fight back and held her own despite being at a disadvantage. That’s when things got out of control.
Pat McAfee: Sasha Banks busted in and broke a light tube on Becky’s head. This quickly turned into a two on one assault until WWE officials finally arrived on scene.
Michael Cole: Not a minute too soon. You will notice that Sasha and Ronda cautiously avoided each other while beating down Becky. It’s quite clear that they both want a shot at Becky’s title and they wanted to use that opportunity to make a statement. Becky Lynch is being treated on site and we’re told that she only suffered minor injuries. What’s next for the SmackDown Women’s champion, though, is anyone’s guess at the moment.
Pat McAfee: In my opinion, neither of these two hags deserves a shot at the title but we’ll have to wait for Adam Pearce’s decision. | 74
MCINTYRE HAS A MESSAGE FOR THE MASKED MAN
Michael Cole: For now, let’s turn our attention to tonight’s main event, as Drew McIntyre will have to be at his best if he wants to put last week’s disappointment behind him by beating the upstart Pete Dunne. Let’s head backstage, where the Scottish Terminator is standing by.
Kayla Braxton: Yes, Michael, I’m with Drew McIntyre and WWE Hall of Famer Stone Cold Steve Austin. Drew, last week, the mysterious masked man who has been plaguing you for weeks now cost you the WWE Universal Championship. What’s your take on this situation?
Drew McIntyre: What’s my take…? Hum, let me think a minute, Kayla… See, I’ll go one better: I have a message for that son of a bitch. I dare you to come at me tonight, coward. This is the last time you take me by surprise. Now, I’ll be waiting for you and when I get my hands on you, I’ll make you think twice about sticking your nose in someone else’s business. I hope that was worth it because what I did to Logan Paul will feel like a gentle stroke in comparison.
Stone Cold Steve Austin: Son, whoever you are, I think you made one hell of a mistake. This guy ain’t kidding. The best thing you can do is that that lousy ski mask back to the Walmart you took it from, get yourself a personality and pray that nobody ever finds out about your stupid shenanigans or my boy McIntyre is going to whip your ass. And that’s the bottom line, cause Stone Cold said so.
Kayla Braxton: Drew, tonight you’re facing Pete Dunne. How badly do you need a win?
Drew McIntyre: Pete Dunne is a vicious son of a bitch who enjoys hurting people but that’s fine with me. I’m done holding back. Any stipulation, any kind of match… now, I’m playing for keeps. I’m going to destroy everyone and everything in my path until I get what I want – what I deserve.
Kayla Braxton: It’s not the first time you’ve vowed to reclaim that belt but, so far, the Universal Championship has remained elusive. What’s different now?
Stone Cold Steve Austin: What’s different is that he’s got Stone Cold in his corner and Stone Cold doesn’t settle for second best. You’re here flapping your gums all evening – yeah, you can look at me with your angry little beady eyes but that’s the truth – like some old broad but if you can’t tell the difference between then and now, then you’re nothing but just another a jackass.
[McIntyre and Stone Cold leave Braxton with a furious look on her face.]
Pat McAfee: Well, Stone Cold is as confrontational as ever. | 80
PETE DUNNE vs DREW McINTYRE (HARDCORE MATCH)
 vs
Melissa Santos: The following contest is set for one fall and it is a hardcore match. Introducing first… from Birmingham, England… weighing in at 205 pounds… ‘The Bruiserweight’… Pete Dunne!
Michael Cole: Pete Dunne has impressed a lot of people with his performances since the beginning of the year. He’s shot up the rankings thanks to his unique blend of aggression and technique but tonight, he faces a different kind of challenge.
Pat McAfee: He’s got that abrasive personality that makes him very difficult to like as a person but as divisive as he may be, this guy is incredibly talented and this type of match suits him like a glove. I can’t tell you who’s going to come out on top but I know for a fact that Dunne will shine.
Melissa Santos: And his opponent… accompanied to the ring by WWE Hall of Famer Stone Cold Steve Austin… from Ayr, Scotland… weighing in at 275 pounds… ‘The Scottish Terminator’… Drew McIntyre!
Michael Cole: Pat, I think we can expect McIntyre to be very frustrated after what happened last week. Is this something he can turn to his advantage?
Pat McAfee: I was surprised he agreed to this stipulation as there’s every chance he will be attacked again. Anger can cloud your judgement but if he listens to the advice of the man who had the biggest chip on shoulder in WWE’s history, he should be ok.
Michael Cole: This could be a turning point for both of these… Oh! Wow! McIntyre won’t even wait for the bell! What a chokeslam! He lifted Pete Dunne like it was nothing! Cover… but Dunne kicks out almost immediately. The Scottish Terminator wasn’t lying when he said he was no longer fooling around.
Pat McAfee: This match was almost over before it even started! McIntyre looks extremely confident. He’s daring Dunne to get back up!
Michael Cole: Dunne and McIntyre are trading haymakers in the middle of the ring now. Oh! What a shot to the jaw! McIntyre hits back with a big boot straight to the face… Dunne staggers back to the ropes… comes charging back but McIntyre lifts him up again… Dunne wriggles free though… German suplex! All of his strength focused on the neck of McIntyre who’s now rocked into the opposite corner.
Pat McAfee: A lower gravity centre can be a useful if you know how to use it. Dunne obviously does.
Michael Cole: Dunne rushes in again but he runs into another big boot from McIntyre. And now, McIntyre is turning the tables and looking to take advantage… unloading on Dunne in what some call the spot of death!
Pat McAfee: He’s got his back against the post, he can’t go anywhere and, so far, he’s been able to block those massive punches coming in from everywhere!
Michael Cole: One more for good measure… this is getting uncomfortable to watch as Dunne is bleeding from the mouth. Oh! McIntyre is looking to hit the patented Snake Eye!
Pat McAfee: Good night, Pete!
Michael Cole: McIntyre is coming back for a second pass… but Dunne lands a kick to the midsection… and he delivers a thunderous Liger Bomb right in the middle of the ring! Dunne obviously had done his homework before such a big match. Meanwhile, McIntyre is wisely rolling outside. Dunne isn’t done by a long shot though… He’s considering his options… Suicide Dive! Oh, my God! Nobody home!
McIntyre saw him coming and stepped out of harm’s way at the last second and Dunne crashed headfirst into the barricade!
Pat McAfee: I’m not sure Dunne can get up from that. What a disaster!
Michael Cole: You spoke too soon! Admittedly, he looks worst for wear but he’s already back on his feet. How can you withstand so much punishment and… Watch out! McIntyre went back inside the ring and connected with a suicide dive of his own! He literally squashed Dunne against the railing!
Pat McAfee: They’re throwing everything at each other! Just how far are they willing to go?
Michael Cole: I’d say they’re not done by a long shot. Look at McIntyre, he’s setting up chairs inside the ring. Oh, I wouldn’t want to be in Dunne’s shoes at the moment. McIntyre has got some evil intentions in mind. He’s picking him up at ringside… My God! He’s going for a powerbomb… but Dunne was able to escape… Oh! No! Back suplex onto those unforgiving steel chairs! What a horrible sound! He may have completely turned the momentum around with that move!
Pat McAfee: McIntyre felt that but I’m afraid that’s just the beginning. Dunne is looking for something at ringside.
Michael Cole: What is he holding behind his back? It’s a shovel! Holy…! I think he only grazed McIntyre’s head with that swing but that was enough to bust him open! Dunne, now standing tall over McIntyre… that would have seemed impossible just a few minutes ago. Oh! Look at that! Pete Dunne is getting into a frenzy, beating down McIntyre with the flat of the shovel! He’s completely lost it!
Pat McAfee: The animalistic nature he showed off as Butch wasn’t just an act. There’s something very dark inside this young man and he’s having a hard time keeping it in check.
Michael Cole: Holy cow! He just tore the blade off the handle! This isn’t even a grudge match or a title match but Dunne wants to prove he can make it at the very top of this industry. He picks up McIntyre, who’s sent crashing into a corner. And Dunne continues his demolition work with a series of hard-hitting clotheslines. What he lacks in size and strength, he definitely makes up for in aggression.
Pat McAfee: He’s done all the damage he could and now he’s just revelling in the punishment of…
Michael Cole: Chokeslam! Chokeslam out of nowhere! Just when it looked like McIntyre was done, he managed to grab Dunne by the throat and planted him into the mat! It’s incredible! McIntyre can hardly stand but he’s still in this fight!
Pat McAfee: He’s endured a tremendous amount a pain but they don’t call him the Scottish Terminator for nothing!
Michael Cole: McIntyre is wiping off the blood from his face as Dunne gets back to a vertical base. He may have missed the chance to pin him and end this match right here and there. Dunne’s not looking to good either. They stumble toward each other… Future Shock DDT on the steel chair! I don’t think McIntyre was really planning for anything! He just acted out of instinct but that could be the move that wins him this match!
Pat McAfee: That’s got to be it!
Michael Cole: McIntyre with the cover… 1… 2… 3… No! Pete Dunne survives the Future Shock DDT! Hey, look out! He’s got a hold of McIntyre’s fingers! He’s going for his infamous joint manipulation! Pat McAfee: Just looking at it is painful enough! I can’t imagine what it’s like to be on the receiving end.
Michael Cole: McIntyre kicks him away though and both men are now on the ground, trying to regain some composure. Dunne is first on his feet… he’s letting McIntyre come to him… Oh, my God! An X-plex! How did he do that? After all he’s been through, Pete Dunne found the momentum and strength to lift McIntyre’s massive frame off the ground! He’s not even looking for a cover here. He goes back to the apron, looking for another weapon… A crowbar now? Because, why not? Dunne is climbing to the top turnbuckle as McIntyre is making it back to his feet… Oh! And he hits the target!
Pat McAfee: If McIntyre didn’t already have a concussion, he certainly does now.
Michael Cole: These weapons are way too dangerous and someone should be considering ending this match on McIntyre’s behalf. That’s not Stone Cold’s style though so this will likely get worse before it gets better. Dunne’s back at ringside and he comes back with… Oh, no. A cinderblock. I’m afraid I see where this is heading… Dunne picks up McIntyre… Come on, Pete! Don’t do that! No! Tombstone piledriver on the cinderblock! That was absolutely horrible! Cover… 1… 2… 3… Are you kidding me? Drew McIntyre somehow kicked out of that!
Pat McAfee: That’s impossible! I think Dunne slipped or something!
Michael Cole: Dunne is going apeshit. He’s completely besides himself. This is just a formality at this point anyway. Dunne with the Bitter End… What? How? McIntyre was about to be dispatched but I think he shifted his weight somehow and turned the Bitter End into a Flatliner, smashing Dunne’s face against the remains of the cinderblock! That’s impossible! McIntyre is now crawling towards the corner as Pete Dunne is making it back up. McIntyre can hardly stand but Dunne isn’t faring much better… Claymore Kick! McIntyre hit the target! 1… 2… 3! It’s over! It’s over!
Pat McAfee: That was one hell of a fight but neither of these guys is going to be the same after going through such an ordeal!
Michael Cole: Stone Cold is in the ring to raise McIntyre’s arm and in all the confusion, we forgot about the masked man who didn’t dare to show up tonight. Does that mean McIntyre is at last rid of him? Who will emerge as Gunther’s challenger? Be there in a week to find out! So long, everyone!
Winner by pinfall: Drew McIntyre in 10:37 | 73
Show rating: 75
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Post by mistersocko on Nov 9, 2024 0:12:34 GMT 1
Monday, September Wk4, 2023 LIVE! From Eugene, OR
ORTON HAS AN IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT
Mauro Ranallo: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Monday Night RAW! We come to you live from Eugene, Oregon. I’m Mauro Ranallo and this is my broadcast colleague Wade Barrett. There’s a lot going on tonight but right now, let’s hear it from Randy Orton who’s in the middle of the ring for an important announcement.
Scott Stanford: Randy, you are supposed to face one half of the RAW Tag Team champions Sami Zayn in a few minutes but you specifically requested me to come down here with a microphone. My first question is fairly obvious: what’s going on.
Randy Orton: Well, first, thank you for being here with me, Scott. The first thing I would like to say is that I apologise to the people of Eugene, Oregon. Last week on RAW, I took an unfortunate but nasty hit to the eye – as you can see – and I’m not medically cleared to compete tonight. I can only imagine your disappointment and my heart sinks for all the kids who came here tonight, hoping to see a real man in action. Fortunately, I’ve asked a colleague to deputise and while it won’t make up to the children, I think their mothers will be pleased.
Scott Stanford: That’s very considerate of you, Randy. I must admit, I didn’t expect you to apologise personally.
Randy Orton: As you can imagine, I’m just as disappointed as my fans. The next thing I have to say, I’m afraid, is of a more sensitive nature. As you know, my former tag team partner Matt Riddle’s girlfriend has been missing for a couple of weeks now. Earlier today, someone sent me a very disturbing video. As a parent myself, I advise you to keep your children away from this but I think it’s important to share this footage.
[The low-resolution pictures show a pregnant woman – presumably Misha – sitting in a dark and damp place. She is handcuffed to an old radiator and appears to be crying. Food packages are scattered all over the place. The footage is only a few seconds long but a heavy silence has fallen on the arena.]
Randy Orton: Dreadful, isn’t it? [Shaking his head.] Who’d do something like that to a woman who’s about to give birth? I’m no doctor – my disease prevented me from studying – but I bet that can’t be good for the baby.
Scott Stanford: My God, Randy… I have to ask the question: do you have any thing to do with what we just saw?
Randy Orton: Oh, Scott! I’m hurt! How could you imagine something like that? What, just because Riddle turned out to be a lousy tag team partner and cheated his way to a victory at Bad Blood, you think I could commit such a heinous act? You’d have to be… sick, really sick to take your frustrations – no matter how justified – on an innocent woman.
Scott Stanford: Randy, we’ve known each other for a long time. I implore you, if you know anything about this poor woman’s whereabouts…
Randy Orton: As you can see, I’m eager to share anything I come across with the wider audience. And it’s always an opportunity to say hi to my old friend Riddle. Hi, Riddle! But I don’t want to take the spotlight away from the performers, they’re the real stars of the show. Tonight, I’ll just be a fan like any other, rooting for… this guy! | 92
JOHN MORRISON vs SAMI ZAYN
 vs 
Samantha Irvin: The following contest is set for one fall… Introducing first, accompanied to the ring by Maxximum Male Models… from Los Angeles, California… weighing in at 215 pounds… ‘The Monday Night Delight’… John Morrison!
Mauro Ranallo: I… I can’t believe what I’ve just heard.
Wade Barrett: I concur. We get to see John Morrison in action, tonight – all thanks to Randy Orton! Fantastic news!
Samantha Irvin: And his opponent… accompanied to the ring by Kevin Owens… from Montreal, Quebec, Canada… weighing in at 212 pounds… He is one half of the RAW Tag Team champions… Sami Zayn!
Mauro Ranallo: Are you kidding me? Orton all but confessed he abducted Matt Riddle’s partner and all you care about is some random match?
Wade Barrett: That’s the difference between you and me, Ranallo. You’re just interested in the backstage drama whereas I am a true purist. Wrestling is poetry in motion and you’re just some… tabloid newsmonkey.
Mauro Ranallo: I’ll pretend I never heard that. Here’s the bell and you can tell from his attitude that John Morrison is either very confident or doesn’t take this seriously at all. Zayn isn’t too impressed… Oh! Morrison tries to stub out his cigar in Sami’s face but he moved away just in time. Superkick from Zayn but it’s Morrison’s turn to duck now! Morrison goes to the corner… nice back flip here but Zayn his hot on his trail… Moonsault from Zayn but there’s nobody home! Oh! Springboard tornado DDT! And this time, Sami Zayn connects!
Wade Barrett: When he’s in the ring, Morrison reminds me of a cat. He looks nonchalant, almost uninterested, until he springs into life.
Mauro Ranallo: Well, your cat seems to have met his match here. Morrison quickly goes to the ropes to recover from that huge early blow but Zayn is looking for a rear choke… Hey! That’s a low blow! Morrison kicked him!
Wade Barrett: Calm down! It’s not cheating if you don’t get caught. The referee was poorly placed, here. Blame him.
Mauro Ranallo: Always the opportunist, Morrison keeps the pressure on with a flying chuck kick and a vicious kick to the face! Zayn’s disoriented… Oh! Did you see that? John Morrison hit the C4 right in the middle of the ring! He hooks the inside leg… 1… 2… and Sami Zayn kicks out at two, much to the disappointment of Morrison’s fan club at ringside.
Wade Barrett: Hey, no need to resent the guys who bet on the right horse. John Morrison is a great athlete and he’s almost guaranteed a world title reign, thanks to that Money in the Bank briefcase he won a few months ago.
Mauro Ranallo: In controversial circumstances, one might add, but that’s besides the point. Morrison, wasting no time, is going for the powerbomb… Oh! What a counter! Sami Zayn shifted his weight and transitioned into a rolling Yoshi tonic, planting Morrison’s back into the ring! Morrison is stunned but Zayn isn’t done yet… he’s positioning himself for… Yes! Blue Thunder Bomb! Morrison had no answer! 1… 2… and Morrison raises the shoulder just in time. Wade Barrett: Thank God! It would have been an unfair an undeserved win. This crowd deserves so much better.
Mauro Ranallo: Yes, I’m sure their entertainment is all you had in mind. Meanwhile, both men are back to a vertical base and… Oh! Morrison hits the target with a superkick, sending Zayn stumbling back to the ropes… he rushes on… and this time, Morrison is on the receiving end of an Enzuigiri! It’s tit for tat at the moment in the middle of the ring. Zayn with punch… misses wildly… Oh! Did you see that? Zayn lost his balance for one second and Morrison capitalised with a released German suplex!
Wade Barrett: Ha! He flew halfway across the ring! That’s what you get with Morrison, efficiency and elegance all rolled-up into one.
Mauro Ranallo: He certainly has a wide fanbase, judging by tonight’s audience. It looks like Zayn’s hurt. After all he went through with the Bloodline, Sami Zayn has proved he’s got the heart of a lion but he landed awkwardly and Morrison, smelling blood, is already back on his case. Oh, come on… Morrison is grinding Zayn’s face on the mat. That’s completely uncalled for.
Wade Barrett: Oh, come on! It’s just a big of light-hearted fun. If you can’t take a bit of banter, you’re in the wrong place.
Mauro Ranallo: Zayn is desperately trying to get back up but… Oh, my! Sunset flip! Even I have to admit that Morrison is on a different level… and he knows it. That said, I’m not sure wasting precious seconds to strike a pose is the best course of action. Morrison is turning his back on Zayn… what is he…? He’s going for the Starship Pain! Morrison’s going to end this!
Wade Barrett: And why shouldn’t he? I think it’s clear for everyone now who the best man is.
Mauro Ranallo: But you said minutes ago that… never mind. Morrison is taking a deep breath and leaps up… but there’s nobody home! Oh, my God! Zayn rolled out of the way but Morrison landed on his feet and delivered a standing corkscrew senton from out of nowhere!
Wade Barrett: This man is a human highlight reel! Every week, he does think you wouldn’t dare to do in your dreams and some people – yes, I’m talking about you, AJ Styles – have the gall to question is credentials as a future world champion!
Mauro Ranallo: Is that it? 1… 2… 3… No! Sami Zayn survived! How did he do that? Sami is a fighting champion, he just doesn’t know how to stay down! He’s not giving up that easily and we’re off to a crazy start already! Morrison doesn’t look too happy about the extra time spent in the ring but I’m sure the crowd will beg to differ. Morrison goes to the ropes again… Oh! And he connects with his trademark flying chuck kick!
Wade Barrett: He’s showing off his entire repertoire of moves tonight. It’s great for us, not so much for that idiot Sami Zayn.
Mauro Ranallo: Don’t be too quick to dismiss him. Sami’s been through hell and back and he’s here to tell the tale. Meanwhile, Morrison is setting up for… Hey, who’s that? A hooded man is coming out from the crowd… he’s climbing the barricade… It’s… It’s AJ Styles! Boom! Phenomenal Forearm and he hit Otis square in the face! Styles is decimating MMM but Morrison can’t afford to get distracted… He’s rushing on… Oh! Single-arm DDT from Zayn who used the distraction to recover! And now the Koji clutch! He’s got the Koji clutch locked in!
Wade Barrett: R-Truth and man.soor are having their asses handed to them by AJ Styles! Those incompetent morons are going to cost Morrison the match!
Mauro Ranallo: For all his moral support, Orton wants nothing to do with AJ Styles but the same can’t be said of Kevin Owens, who’s grabbed a steel chair. I think he wants to even the odds!
Wade Barrett: What’s his problem with MMM? He’s got to learn to control his violent impulses!
Mauro Ranallo: For once, Sami Zayn seems to agree with you. He broke the hold just as Morrison was about to tap out and he’s taking the chair away from Owens… and as you can imagine, KO isn’t too happy with that.
Wade Barrett: These two argue all the time like an old couple. It’s only a matter of time before they break apart. I told you so!
Mauro Ranallo: You told us so six months ago, Wade! But in this instance, you are correct: tensions are flaring between the tag team champions but Zayn won’t give back the chair. Oh, no! Turn around Sami! Oh, my God! John Morrison was lying in wait and as soon as Sami Zayn turned around, he hit a superkick right through the steel chair! It’s absolute mayhem here as Styles continues to fight the other three members of MMM and… Double foot stomp on the steel chair! And Zayn is busted open!
Wade Barrett: Morrison saw an opportunity to turn that situation to his advantage and he grabbed it with both hands. Congratulations!
Mauro Ranallo: That’s got to be it but Morrison wants to end it with Starship Pain… He’s setting up… What now? It’s Matt Riddle coming down the aisle but what is he holding in his hand? My God! It’s a gun! Run, Wade!
[…]
[Everyone seems stunned for a moment, except for Orton who jumps over the barricade and runs through the crowd like he’d been shot from a cannon. Riddle walks on with a blank stare, trying to aim at Orton. People are screaming, running or ducking everywhere, until the cameraman drops his camera and the show goes off for a commercial break.]
Result of this match: no contest after 12:24 | 71
CHARLOTTE’S CHALLENGE
Mauro Ranallo: We’re back live, ladies and gentlemen! A very serious situation developed here after Matt Riddle decided to pull out a gun inside the arena, presumably in the hope of forcing answers from his former tag team partner Randy Orton about his partner’s abduction. Fortunately, he was stopped by our security detail and taken into custody by the local law enforcement authorities during the break but we would like to take this opportunity to apologise to all of you who may have been upset by Riddle’s attitude and particularly the fans in the arena.
Wade Barrett: Unfortunately, unhinged character like Riddle tend to see wrestling as a place where they can act out on their antisocial impulses. This man is a danger to himself and others around him and as cold as it may seem, that poor woman may be better off wherever she is.
Mauro Ranallo: Let’s not get ahead of ourselves here. Randy Orton has been pushing him closer to the edge for months now and while I can’t condone his actions, I think he deserves some sympathy.
Wade Barrett: That junkie brings a gun inside a crowded arena and he deserves some sympathy? Alright! So do Charles Manson and Josef Stalin, then!
Mauro Ranallo: I’m giving up. Let’s take a breather and head backstage, where our broadcast colleague Byron Saxton is standing by.
Byron Saxton: Yes, Mauro. Please welcome my guest at this time, Charlotte. Charlotte, I’ve got to ask first: what do you make of tonight’s dramatic events?
Charlotte: You want my honest opinion? When the going gets tough, some people just can’t think straight. Me, I’m cut from a different cloth and that’s the reason why I won so many championships. I was upset too when I lost my RAW Women’s Championship to a cheat and I was even more upset when I lost it again to that cheat’s understudy. Now, do you see me making a spectacle of myself, Byron?
Byron Saxton: In my opinion, it’s not exactly the same thing.
Charlotte: Wonderful but did I ask for your opinion, dear? No, I asked you a simple question, the answer of which was ‘no, my Queen, I don’t’. See, that’s simple enough. Now, ask me why I’ve made myself scarce for the past couple of weeks.
Byron Saxton: Actually, what I wanted to ask was…
Charlotte: Look, nobody cares about what you want, Byron. Apart from your mom, do you believe there’s a single person on this planet who turns their TV on to see you or find out what you want? No, of course not. So, to answer my question, I was busy negotiating a title match at Extreme Rules. And, Iyo, I know you don’t understand our language very well so I’m going to speak very slowly, just for you: I. Will. Beat. Your. Ass. At. Extreme. Rules. Ta-ta.
[Charlotte walks away while Saxton looks at the camera with a sad expression on his face.] | 79
CIAMPA MOCKS ZAYN JR
[Saxton doesn’t stay alone for long as Johnny Gargano and Tommaso Ciampa come in before they cut it back to ringside.]
Johnny Gargano: Why the long face, Byron? The lady was mean to you, pal?
Byron Saxton: Oh, never mind. Some interviews are more enjoyable than others. By the way, are you still chasing the RAW Tag Team Championship?
Tommaso Ciampa: Oh, I don’t know, man. You see, Sami Zayn is one hell of a champion. I don’t know if we can beat him.
Johnny Gargano: We’re just a couple of average Joes. We made a name for ourselves in NXT but we have no business mixing it up with ‘superstars’ like Sami Zayn.
Byron Saxton: Are you avoiding Kevin Owens’ name on purpose?
Tommaso Ciampa: Who?
Byron Saxton: Kevin Owens. Sami Zayn’s tag team partner.
Johnny Gargano: Erm… no, doesn’t ring any bell.
Tommaso Ciampa: I think he’s talking about Zayn’s sidekick. The fat lad with a beard who’s made a career of riding Sami’s coattails. What about him?
Byron Saxton: You’re not mentioning him.
Johnny Gargano: That’s because there isn’t much to say about him. He’s Jimmy Olsen to Zayn’s Superman. I think it’s pretty cool from Sami that he agreed to be his meal ticket.
Tommaso Ciampa: I like the way you’re thinking though, Byron. How about Tommaso Ciampa versus Sami Zayn Junior, live, tonight, right here in Eugene, Oregon? [Turning to the camera.] Hey, fat lad, if you’re listening to this, what do you say about my idea? Get yourself under the spotlight for a change. Wouldn’t it be great to stand on your own, like a man?
Johnny Gargano: Guy must be 40 or something. It would be high time.
Tommaso Ciampa: If you’re interested, you know where to find me, fat lad.
[Gargano and Ciampa walk away.] | 71
US OPEN CHALLENGE CONTINUES
Mauro Ranallo: It looks like #DIY aren’t done with Kevin Owens. We’re back at ringside, ladies and gentlemen, with a… What is it, now?
Wade Barrett: I don’t believe it.
Mauro Ranallo: Well, like him or not, Konnan certainly knows how to make an entrance. Two floats are making their way down the aisle, one with a mariachi orchestra and the other with the Mexican legend and his protégé, the United States champion… Prince Puma!
Wade Barrett: What an egomaniac. They defended that title a couple of times and he sets up a carnival? Pah!
Mauro Ranallo: It may be over the top but it’s certainly spectacular. Konnan has been in a very confident mood ever since Puma survived Seth Freakin’ Rollins’ challenge. Let’s hear him.
Konnan: Escuchame! Eugene, Oregon… tonight, I bring to you the man whose name will be etched in lucha legend. This boy I found making a living in underground wrestling matches is now your United States champion, thanks to the power of Acolnahuacatl…
Wade Barrett: I’m pretty sure he said another name a couple of weeks ago. He’s acting like a fake tour guide.
Konnan: Tonight, I want to tell you about our great Aztec culture. Music is a very important part of that culture for it was played on the battlefield. According to the myth, the warriors of the eagle, jaguar and puma clans were strongly associated with…
Mauro Ranallo: The good people of Eugene don’t seem particularly interested.
Wade Barrett: Thank God, MVP and Cedric Alexander will spare us the rest of the lecture.
MVP: Hold on, hold on, hold on! Look, brother, I think we all like to learn something new every day but let’s be honest, having you read through an entire Wikipedia page isn’t anyone’s idea of entertainment.
Konnan: You’re disrespecting an entire civilisation!
MVP: Hey, don’t blame me. I get the whole proud ethnic shtick. I was the first to stand up and say this company is racist so I won’t blame you for trying to put Mexico forward. The only problem is, you’re going at this the wrong way. A white man with drug issues derailed the show and now it’s up to us to give these people what they want – and what they want is a title match!
Konnan: All you had to do was ask. Human sacrifices were also an important part of our culture. Your friend will appease the gods.
MVP: Somebody, bring a referee! | 73
CEDRIC ALEXANDER vs PRINCE PUMA (UNITED STATES CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH)
vs
Samantha Irvin: The following contest is set for one fall and it is for the United States Championship. Introducing first, the challenger… representing the Hurt Business… from Charlotte, North Carolina… weighing in at 205 pounds… Cedric Alexander!
Mauro Ranallo: Another week, another challenger for Prince Puma’s crown but the interesting thing here is that Alexander’s usual partner in crime, Shelton Benjamin, isn’t at ringside tonight.
Wade Barrett: It’s just like to try and drive a wedge between two good friends, Ranallo. As far as you know, he could be late to the show. Don’t go spreading rumours, please.
Samantha Irvin: And his opponent… already in the ring… from Boyle Heights, California… weighing in at 205 pounds… He is the United States champion… Prince Puma!
Mauro Ranallo: Much like his namesake, Prince Puma is a silent and deadly predator. He’s put down pretty much every one in his path this year thanks to his incredible acrobatic prowess.
Wade Barrett: That’s one very long and circumvoluted way of saying this guy is the most over rated wrestler in the world at the moment. Everything has been going in his favour but he will run out of luck soon and I’ll be there to see it.
Mauro Ranallo: These men are about to take each other to the limit and… Oh, wow! Puma won’t even wait for the bell and he connects with a picture-perfect dropkick, much to MVP’s fury! Alexander has been pushed back into the corner and Puma starts working on him with a series of mid-kicks. Certainly not the start the challenger had in mind.
Wade Barrett: The guy under the mask might have been a good kid but unfortunately, he’s been corrupted by Konnan’s influence already.
Mauro Ranallo: Alexander is trying to protect himself but Puma’s strikes are just too fast for him. He’s fading fast! Off the ropes goes Prince Puma… Oh! What a nasty flying knee! He hits Alexander on the tip of the chin! Another and down goes Alexander. This one could be over pretty quick! But… What is Konnan doing? He’s throwing a table into the ring. This isn’t a no disqualification match though!
Wade Barrett: The table is the easiest weapon to get away with and you can bet that old charlatan wants his charge to be more ‘edgy’. He has no interest in guiding Puma to the top, he just wants to create a younger version of himself.
Mauro Ranallo: Prince Puma is waiting precious time here, arguing with his mentor. It looks like Konnan will get his way as Puma finally sets up the table in the opposite corner but Cedric Alexander is getting back on his feet. Alexander rushes on… but Puma sidesteps him! Alexander stops just before he hits the table but… Oh, my God! Alexander used the table as a springboard to deliver a devastating soccer kick to Puma! He caught him flat-footed here!
Wade Barrett: Puma dropped to one knee but he won’t go down! I’ve got a feeling this will come back to haunt him.
Mauro Ranallo: Tremendous resilience from Puma but Alexander stays on the front foot with a kick to the midsection. Vertical suplex… all the blood is rushing to Puma’s head but that could be the least of his problems… and Prince Puma goes through the table as Cedric Alexander releases the suplex! This could be the turning point of the match!
Wade Barrett: That’s what a sorry excuse for a manager gets you! We’ve got a new champion! Mauro Ranallo: Alexander with the cover… 1… 2… 3… No! Konnan grabs Puma’s foot and places it on the rope! It’ll take more than that to pry away the United States Championship from Prince Puma! That said, the momentum has firmly swung in Alexander’s favour now. He picks up his opponent… what’s he going to do? He lifts him up… Oh! Lifted double knee gutbuster! That will leave a mark!
Wade Barrett: Haha! What was meant to be a difficult matchup is turning into a punishment! And things are about to get even better!
Mauro Ranallo: Alexander is climbing down to join MVP who… Oh, no. He’s got a kendo stick! They have completely lost it. Referee Shawn Bennett is trying to convince them not to use that weapon and this is probably in Alexander’s best interests. If he gets disqualified, all this would have been in vain. But… Hey! Watch out! Oh! What a plancha! Prince Puma used that time to regroup and he took out Alexander and MVP in one swift move!
Wade Barrett: I’m guessing he was so afraid of the beating he was about to receive that it spurred him into action. Fear’s a powerful motivation.
Mauro Ranallo: I’m not sure Prince Puma knows the meaning of the word fear but that was an absolutely splendid plancha and I think even you would have to admit that, Wade. And now, it’s Konnan’s turn to get into the referee’s face! These guys really have the worst job. Meanwhile… what is Puma doing over there? My God! He picked up the bell and smashed it across Cedric Alexander’s face!
Wade Barrett: What is that bloke’s problem? I’m willing to bet he’s trying to get intentionally disqualified because he knows deep down that he can’t beat Alexander!
Mauro Ranallo: I have to admit I didn’t think Puma had that… feral side in him. That’s completely unexpected. Alexander is busted open while Puma is going berserk. Come on, Puma! Don’t do that! This is getting completely out of hand! He just threw a monitor at Alexander! Somebody’s got to stop this match!
Wade Barrett: What a piece of trash! He realised he was beaten in the middle of the ring and he used Konnan’s distraction to turn the match on its head. He has no right to call himself a champion!
Mauro Ranallo: Prince Puma’s got a chair in hand now! Alexander is backing away… I think he knows he can’t win this. No! Stop! Oh, my God! Puma swung the chair but there was nobody home! Alexander quickly retreats to the ring… Springboard flatliner! Unbelievable! Where did he find the strength to hit that move?
Wade Barrett: This young man has the heart of a lion, that’s how! He would make a fine United States champion… no, he WILL make a fine US champion!
Mauro Ranallo: Konnan looks like he’s seen a ghost! Meanwhile, MVP and Alexander are lifting Puma’s carcass into the ring. This could be it… 1… 2… 3… No! Prince Puma survives but he remains in a dire situation. Alexander is setting up his Lumbar Check… Hey! Wait a minute! No! Konnan picked up the kendo stick and he just hit MVP in the back of the head! Puma capitalises with a back elbow to Alexander’s face… and a poisoned hurricanrana! Alexander was so close to an upset… but Puma is now climbing to the top turnbuckle… 630 Splash! 630 Splash! 1… 2… 3! Prince Puma retains but Cedric Alexander pushed him to the limit and beyond!
Wade Barrett: You have got to be kidding me! Alexander should never have lost this in a million years! Your so-called hero and his manager are frauds! They cheated their way to victory but their day of reckoning will come sooner than they think!
Winner by pinfall and still United States champion: Prince Puma in 8:22 | 74
LAWLER IS TERMINATED
Mauro Ranallo: Once again, lots of controversy here on RAW but one thing that will bring everyone back on the same page – hopefully – is the celebration of one of wrestling’s greats. Tonight, we’re saying goodbye to a man whose name has become synonymous with Monday Night RAW over the past decades. Our friend Jerry ‘The King’ Lawler retires tonight and we’re going to relive some of his most iconic moments all through the evening. But first, let’s head backstage where Scott Stanford is standing with the great man. Over to you, Scott!
Shane McMahon: Hello! Sorry for the surprise but Scott is… indisposed at the moment. But don’t worry, I’m here to save the day. Let’s head for Jerry’s room, I’ve got plenty of questions to ask. [He opens the door without knocking. Bronson Reed and Robert Roode briefly comes into the frame.] Howdy, Jerry!
Jerry Lawler: Hey, Shane! I have to admit, I wasn’t expecting you but at least, I’ve got my pants on!
Shane McMahon: Ha, ha! That’s clever, Jerry. I’m here to ask you a few questions, if you don’t mind.
Jerry Lawler: Be my guest, Shane! So long as it’s not about one of my ex-wives!
Shane McMahon: No, don’t worry about that. So, here’s the first one: considering my father hired you way back when in 1992, did you expect to outlast him in his own company?
Jerry Lawler: Er… I never really thought about it. He’s… your father… well, you know what they say: if you can’t say anything bad about a friend, don’t talk about them!
Shane McMahon: That’s interesting. I was precisely about to ask you if it was difficult for you to keep your mouth shut while he was facing those accusations.
Jerry Lawler: He didn’t exactly put his neck on the line when I had my own problems.
Shane McMahon: The only difference being that he’s innocent and that he made you a very rich man.
Jerry Lawler: Look, kid, he’s your father and you love him. I can respect that but to be honest, you’re spoiling the mood with your questions about your old man. You should be working for a dirt sheet if that’s what you’re really all about.
Shane McMahon: Jerry, you sorry son of a gun. You really thought I would let you get away with it? After you backed Bron Breakker of all people against me? You thought there wouldn’t be consequences?
Jerry Lawler: Alright, let’s all calm down! It’s my last day on the job, Shane. There’s no need for any physicality. Tomorrow morning, I’ll be out of your hair and you won’t have to worry about little old me.
Shane McMahon: I couldn’t agree more.
[Shane and Roode pull out baseball bats while Reed blocks Lawler’s exit, as well as the cameraman’s. The two of them start begin beating up Lawler in front of the camera for long minutes, ignoring the cameraman’s screams and sobs. They exit the room, leaving Lawler lying in a pool of his own blood.] | 58
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED
Mauro Ranallo: … What the… What was that?
Wade Barrett: Er… I…
Samantha Irvin: Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome… Bianca Belair!
Mauro Ranallo: This place is… there are way too many people going over the edge, here!
Bianca Belair: Look, I’m not going to waste anybody’s time so hear me out and you could get back to your miserable lives. For weeks now, I’ve been abused and harassed by one Jordynne Grace and, quite frankly, this is getting old very quick. What’s your problem with me, Jordynne? I mean, apart from the fact that you’re probably jealous of me – and rightly so. What did I do wrong? I spoke my mind, gave you a couple of tips to improve your health and then I beat you at Bad Blood. Guilty as charged but you should grow up a little and stop blaming me for your problems.
[Jordynne Grace’s music hits.]
Jordynne Grace: My God, did you finish major of your promo in bullies’ college or what? Only a very insecure woman would remind anyone who would listen that she is the EST of pretty much everything. For some reason, you felt threatened by my presence and you decided to pick up on me. Then you cheated your way to a win at Bad Blood, which isn’t exactly the same thing as winning in the first place. And yes, since then, I have been demanding a rematch – you got that right, at least. I’m an honest student of this fine art. I never cut any corners, I just want to be the best wrestler I can be and I have no lessons to take from you, Bianca. If you beat me fair and square, that’s ok but I won’t have it any other way.
Bianca Belair: Are you finished? Sorry, I was falling asleep. That’s where you’ve got it wrong, girl. I actually taught you a lesson and a valuable one at that. I lost my RAW Women’s Championship because Asuka cheated. That’s wrestling for you. If you’re not ready to do everything in your power to win, then you don’t deserve to win. Apparently, you’re not a very quick learner so I going to give you what you want: I’m going to beat you – again – tonight and this time, I won’t need to bend the rules. That’s my second lesson to you: if you’re not the strong-EST woman in the room, you’d better watch your mouth, girl.
[Belair and Grace exchange angry looks as the show goes off for a commercial break.] | 67
ZOEY STARK vs CHARLOTTE
 vs
Samantha Irvin: The following contest is set for one fall. Introducing first… from Las Vegas, Nevada… Zoey Stark.
Mauro Ranallo: We’re back, ladies and gentleman, for this matchup requested by Charlotte Flair herself. But before we get into that, we’ve been told that Jerry Lawler has been taken to a local medical facility and the news are… not that good.
Wade Barrett: Ranallo, you’re just being disrespectful now. Zoey Stark is a great athlete in her own right and I wouldn’t be surprised if she knocked the Queen down a peg or two with that never-say-die attitude of hers.
Samantha Irvin: And her opponent… making her way to the ring… from the Queen City… Charlotte Flair!
Mauro Ranallo: The show must go on I suppose and that’s certainly what the King would have wanted. This match has been requested by Charlotte Flair herself as she remains determined to challenge Iyo Sky for the RAW Women’s Championship.
Wade Barrett: I am sorry to say that Charlotte has turned into a very bitter woman who just can’t see her prime years are definitely over. It’s time to leave the stage, dear.
Mauro Ranallo: No love lost between these two women as Stark tried to make a name for herself earlier this year by blindsiding Charlotte on a couple of occasions and it looks like Zoey is as petulant as ever as she slaps the taste out of Charlotte’s mouth. Immediate response from Flair, who just rams her opponent into the opposite corner.
Wade Barrett: That’s exactly what I was saying. That’s the kind of ***** Charlotte would have been the first to appreciate, ten years ago.
Mauro Ranallo: That may be so but Zoey Stark might come to regret this as Charlotte continues to dominate with a released German suplex. Stark went flying halfway through the ring and I think you can see how focused Charlotte has been since the beginning of this match. Hardly a wasted movement. Another release German suplex… and another! And this time, Stark can’t get back to her feet.
Wade Barrett: This move is not only devastating for your neck, it also leaves you disoriented. Right now, Zoey Stark is fighting on instinct alone.
Mauro Ranallo: Then that might not be quite enough. Charlotte backs her into the corner again with a series of strikes… right… left… right… right… Stark is doing all she can to stay in the game but she’s fading fast… And Charlotte sends her flying again with yet another release German suplex!
Wade Barrett: She thinks she’s Brock Lesnar!
Mauro Ranallo: Charlotte could win this match right now. She’s standing tall in the middle of the ring and, so far, Zoey Stark has had zero offence. This match hasn’t been competitive at all and now Charlotte is grinding Stark’s face against the mat. She won’t even try to hide her disdain. She picks up her opponent… and she hits a snap dragon suplex! It’s been all Charlotte so far!
Wade Barrett: To her credit, Stark is still getting up. Mauro Ranallo: It’s not like she’s got much of a choice. Now, it’s Charlotte’s turn to slap her opponent in the face but… wait a minute! Stark’s fighting back! She’s landing one punch after the other and Charlotte just can’t keep up with her! Charlotte’s backing away… Oh, wow! She used the ropes as a slingshot and hit back with a massive clothesline, turning Zoey Stark inside out. What a blow!
Wade Barrett: If she had an ounce of decency, Charlotte would have ended this already. There’s no point in keeping this thing going.
Mauro Ranallo: I think she wants to send a message to the RAW Women’s champion. She’s going back to work on Stark… who counters with a jaw-breaker! Charlotte didn’t expect that… and Stark connects with a step up knee strike now! Half and half suplex now! Can she do it? Can Zoey Stark capitalise on her one hot streak in that matchup!
Wade Barrett: That would be a huge surprise but also a breath of fresh air!
Mauro Ranallo: She probably knows she’s only got one shot at this. Stark sets up Charlotte for the K-360… but Charlotte pushes her away at the last moment and… Spear! Spear! Charlotte delivered a massive Spear out of nowhere! That’s got to be it but adding insult to injury, Charlotte is going to lock in the Figure Eight… She does – all the while looking straight into the camera. Stark has no choice, she’s got to tap out.
Wade Barrett: That was a valiant effort by Zoey Stark but what chance did she have in the first place? They say hell hath no fury like a woman scorned and it’s quite clear at this stage that Charlotte feels that taking the RAW Women’s Championship away from her was a damnable offence.
Winner by submission: Charlotte in 5:08 | 58
REIGNS NEEDS A NEW TRIBE
[Roman Reigns is standing in his private locker room with Paul Heyman at his side.]
Roman Reigns: So, wise man, did you manage to cancel that match at Extreme Rules?
Paul Heyman: I’m sorry to say… no, my tribal chief.
Roman Reigns: That’s disappointing. I expected better from you.
Paul Heyman: I realise I let you down, my tribal chief.
Roman Reigns: So, how are you going to serve me now?
Paul Heyman: Seth Rollins is a worthy opponent but he would be no match for you without that injury, my tribal chief. Maybe there is someone out there whose beastly instincts can’t be kept in check and who’d be willing to ‘even out’ the playing field by doing to Seth Freakin Rollins what the Fiend did to you.
Roman Reigns: Alright. See what you can do about it. You know, wise man, I’m looking at this room and I remember that, not so long ago, it was full of people – my own cousins. Now it’s just the two of us.
Paul Heyman: That’s because, unlike them, I would never betray you, my tribal chief.
Roman Reigns: What’s a chief without a tribe, wise man?
Paul Heyman: Then let me be your tribe, my tribal chief! We don’t need anybody else!
Roman Reigns: Yes, we do but it would be a mistake to try and recreate a new family. At the end of the day, my cousins were too proud to live by my rule. At least, that’s something I can respect. Wise man, you know pretty much everyone worth knowing in this trade. You are going to find me the vilest, the most depraved and the most fame-hungry individual you can get and together, we will build a new tribe. I want a man who has as little respect for himself as he has for others.
Paul Heyman: Are you sure this is the kind of person you want by your side, my tribal chief?
Roman Reigns: Last time around, I surrounded myself with better men and eventually, everything fell apart. I will rebuild my empire but this time, I will use a different material. I know what I’m doing. Find me that person.
Paul Heyman: There is no depth I wouldn’t sink to for your satisfaction, my tribal chief. Leave this to me and I will find you the most despicable piece of trash this company has ever seen.
Roman Reigns: Good.
[Heyman leaves hurriedly.] | 95
AN APOLOGY OF SORTS
[Backstage, MMM congratulate John Morrison for what they feel is a moral victory. Maxxine is pouring the champagne while Morrison sucks on his fat cigar.]
Maxxine: That’s the second time you’re kicking Sami Zayn’s ass after SummerSlam, Johnny. When are you going to bring back the tag team titles to MMM?
John Morrison: Carpe diem, honey. The most important thing right now is to focus on the world title. And for that, we will have to take care of AJ Styles since he can’t help but make a nuisance of himself.
Otis: Er, boss… how is that going to help the rest of us?
John Morrison: Excellent question, my friend. There’s a lot of perks associated with being the number one guy in the company. Once I’m sitting on top of the world, getting you a title shot will be a piece of cake, believe me.
man.soor: Sorry but how would you know? I don’t think you’ve ever been a world champion yourself, have you?
John Morrison: And you have? Ha, ha! Don’t worry, mate. I know what I’m talking about. Just trust me and I’ll turn your wildest dreams into a reality.
[man.soor and Otis look unconvinced but they return to the party as R-Truth approaches Morrison.]
R-Truth: Hey, look, I know I didn’t do so well last week against EC3 and I just wanted to say I’m sorry if I embarrassed you.
John Morrison: Don’t mention it. I’ve got some very special plans for my old tag team partner. I’m sure you’ll like them.
R-Truth: I have a question though. Where are the others?
John Morrison: The… others?
R-Truth: Yeah, all the other guys I’ve heard about – Johnny Nitro, Johnny Mundo, Johnny Impact…
John Morrison: Ha! Don’t worry about them, Truth.
R-Truth: They’re not coming to the party. Shame. The beer tastes a bit strange but I’m sure that’s all Maxxine could find.
John Morrison: It’s called champagne, Truth.
R-Truth: Strange name for a beer.
[R-Truth makes his way to the bottle as Morrison stares at him with his fists clenched.] | 62
MERCY THE BUZZARD AND SISTER ABIGAIL vs KING CUERNO AND INDI HARTWELL
Samantha Irvin: The following is a mixed tag team match set for one fall. Introducing first… representing the Wyatt Six… Mercy the Buzzard and Sister Abigail.
Mauro Ranallo: The skirmishes between the members of the Church of Kane and the Wyatt Six continue but since the Fiend disappeared in a ball of fire at Bad Blood, Kane and his minions have been dominant.
Wade Barrett: Let me get this straight, Ranallo. I don’t understand these people or what they’re arguing about. I don’t even see the point since Bray Wyatt and his demonic alter ego have been missing for weeks.
Samantha Irvin: And their opponent… representing the Church of Kane… first, from The Highlands of Guerrero, Mexico… weighing in at 204 pounds… King Cuerno! And his tag team partner… from Melbourne, Australia… Indi Hartwell!
Mauro Ranallo: King Cuerno is a big game hunter and it seems like he’s set his sights on Mercy. I’ve got a feeling he won’t rest until his head rests in his trophy cabinet.
Wade Barrett: For some reason, these guys – and gals – absolutely hate each other and there’s every chance they’ll be throwing everything but the kitchen sink at each other so even if you don’t know why they’re doing it, you can enjoy the violence. I know I will!
Mauro Ranallo: Mercy and Cuerno will get us started… Oh, right off the bat, King Cuerno connects with a superkick! I think Mercy wasn’t ready for that and he goes tumbling on the outside. Mercy is back on his feet… but not for long! Cuerno sends him crashing back down again with a Tope con Hilo! He’s been all over Mercy so far in this matchup and smashes Mercy’s head against the steel poste as Sister Abigail looks on.
Wade Barrett: The one thing I like about these weirdos is that they have no respect for their opponents’ safety. Here’s hoping this one will turn into a bloodbath.
Mauro Ranallo: Mercy is thrown back in… another superkick connects and King Cuerno goes for the pin… 1… 2… No, that was quite lame, actually. And in comes Indi Hartwell! From the looks of it, Abigail isn’t very keen on joining this fight.
Wade Barrett: For some reason, she seems to be afraid of Hartwell. These guys always talk in riddles so I don’t know why they hate each other but these two have been at each other’s throat for some time.
Mauro Ranallo: I’ve got a feeling only Uncle Howdy knows the full story. But that’s a matter for a different time as Harwell almost takes Abigail’s head off with a vicious European uppercut. Hartwell with a backbreaker… but Abigail lands on her feet like a cat… and she delivers a snap German suplex to Hartwell before she can react! Abigail is fighting like a woman possessed – pun intended. She connects with a couple of forearms to the face… Off the ropes she goes… and a boot straight across the face!
Wade Barrett: Her more vicious nature rears up its head whenever she’s backed into a corner and she has to fight. When you think about it, these guys are all damaged goods. At least, Cuerno and Hartwell are acting normally. Mauro Ranallo: I’m not sure following the orders of someone who considers himself as the devil’s favourite demon qualifies as ‘acting normally’. Abigail goes back to work… Oh! Hartwell hits back with a jawbreaker. She’s immediately crawling back to her corner but Abigail is on her back… literally, with that crossface solidly locked in.
Wade Barrett: She’s laughing maniacally as she’s trying to tear off her opponent’s shoulder blades. What a sight…
Mauro Ranallo: She can be a little over-enthusiastic at times but she certainly is a fierce competitor. The same could be said of King Cuerno who looks like he won’t sit idly while his partner is being manhandled. Cuerno goes to the top turnbuckle… diving front dropkick… but there’s nobody home! Abigail is retreating to the other side of the ring and tagging in Mercy, who takes out Cuerno with a thunderous clothesline!
Wade Barrett: That’s the kind of miscommunication that usually doesn’t go unpunished at this level. Bloody amateurs.
Mauro Ranallo: Indeed, King Cuerno and Indi Hartwell are finding themselves in a very difficult situation. Mercy the Buzzard is all about power and once he gets on a roll, he’s practically unstoppable. Oh, wow! Canadian backbreaker! He almost broke King Cuerno in half! And another clothesline for good measure. This isn’t what Cuerno and Hartwell had in mind when they started this matchup. Cover! 1… 2… and a kick out at two!
Wade Barrett: I really thought he had him! Cuerno and Hartwell have shown very little since the beginning of this match but it’s also worth mentioning that Kane and Finn Balor have been conspicuous by their absence.
Mauro Ranallo: Mercy isn’t done with him, apparently… He lifts him up but Cuerno wriggles free… A kick to the midsection! Cuerno goes for the Enzuigiri but again, nobody home! And Mercy, planting Cuerno in the middle of the ring with a Texas powerbomb! What an impact! Meanwhile, Indi Hartwell is calling for a tag but King Cuerno can’t get away from Mercy’s talons. Mercy sends Cuerno for a ride… Oh, my God! Deep Six Powerbomb!
Wade Barrett: Ridiculous strength from Mercy! And I think this could be it.
Mauro Ranallo: Cuerno looks like a crash-test dummy at the moment. Mercy sends him running again… Oh! Hartwell tagged herself in but I don’t think Mercy saw it… End of Days! He hit the End of Days but Cuerno isn’t legal! Instead, Hartwell rushes in and tosses Abigail over the ropes. She never saw it coming! And now Hartwell takes leaf out of Kane’s book with a sidewalk slam while Mercy tries to pin down Cuerno! There’s chaos everywhere in the ring! Hammerlock DDT! Abigail is down but Mercy realises his mistake… he’s going to… Wait a minute! Knee bar! King Cuerno has a knee bar locked in! Hartwell goes to the apron as Abigail is regaining her senses… Springboard Rocket Kick! Bullseye! 1… 2… 3! And just like that, King Cuerno and Indi Hartwell snatch the win!
Wade Barrett: Credit to them. They were dominated for most of the match but they waged a blitzkrieg and run away with the win. What that means for the apparently never-end feud between these two factions… hell if I know.
Winners by pinfall: King Cuerno and Indi Hartwell in 6:55 | 58
A HELPING HAND
[Paul Heyman is walking backstage, thinking intensely when he bumps into Angelina Love.]
Paul Heyman: Please, mind your step, young lady! You almost knocked me over!
Angelina Love: Hey! Watch your… Oh, it’s you, Mister Heyman. I’m sorry.
Paul Heyman: Ah, you can call me Paul. I was a fan of your work in that… other company.
Angelina Love: Coming from you, I take that as a huge compliment! If I may be so bold… you seem preoccupied. Anything I can help you with?
Paul Heyman: Oh, I don’t think so. I need to deal with Seth Freakin Rollins. My tribal chief wants him… off the shelf for a few weeks but that’s easier said than done.
Angelina Love: Then it’s a good thing we met! I happen to have just the guy you need: Cameron Grimes!
Paul Heyman: Do you really think he could take out Rollins?
Angelina Love: Sir, I know it! He isn’t called a caveman for nothing. Most of the time, he has to hold himself in check or he would be immediately disqualified. Who knows what he could do if left to own devices?
Paul Heyman: If he could do that, we… I would be extremely grateful.
Angelina Love: Consider it done!
[Love skips away while Heyman looks on with a strange glint in his eye.] | 65
BRON BREAKKER vs BRONSON REED
vs 
Samantha Irvin: The following contest is set for one fall. Introducing first… accompanied to the ring by Shotzi… from Woodstock, Georgia… weighing in at 250 pounds… Bron Breakker!
Mauro Ranallo: What just transpired does not bode well for Seth Freakin Rollins but what we are about to witness now is the end of a feud that has been going on for months now. Bron Breakker has been abused in more ways than one, his girlfriend has been threatened and his mentor, Jerry ‘the King’ Lawler has been savagely beaten. Tonight, he gets the opportunity to take out his frustrations.
Wade Barrett: Bron Breakker is the face of a generation – a generation of cry-babies. Instead of meeting Shane McMahon’s challenge head on, he complained and whinged until everybody was bored out of their skin. It comes to an end tonight but I promise you, he won’t enjoy the final chapter.
Samantha Irvin: And his opponent… accompanied to the ring by Mister McMahon and the Kiss My Ass Club… from Black Forest, South Australia… weighing in at 330 pounds… Bronson Reed!
Mauro Ranallo: The final obstacle on Breakker’s road to redemption takes the form of the massive Bronson Reed. He’s been Shane McMahon’s insurance policy ever since the KMA Club was brought back and tonight, he holds his fate in his hands.
Wade Barrett: Then Shane McMahon can rest easy because this man is a force of nature. He could crush anyone in this arena into a tiny ball of bone and flesh and Bron Breakker for all his anger and hatred, will be no different.
Mauro Ranallo: Bronson Reed is an absolute monster of a man, there is no doubt about it. The referee calls for the bell… here we go and right off the start, Reed with a double-leg takedown on Breakker and he starts pummelling his opponent.
Wade Barrett: Reed is making clear who the stronger man is. Breakker may well be a genetic freak but it means nothing compared to a human tsunami like Bronson Reed.
Mauro Ranallo: Reed is feeling very confident, indeed, and why wouldn’t he with Shane McMahon and Robert Roode as back-up in his corner. Off the ropes goes Reed… Oh! What a clothesline! This really did a number on Breakker and Reed is not letting up. Breakker goes for the ride… and Reed connects with a sit-out spinebuster!
Wade Barrett: Ha, ha! Get ready for a new inductee into the Kiss My Ass Club!
Mauro Ranallo: Reed with the cover… 1… and Breakker kicks out early. To be honest, I expect Breakker to make a stronger start to this match considering what happened earlier but Reed did his homework and he snuffed out Breakker’s rage. And now, he’s going for another high-impact move… Oh, my God! No! Spinning chokeslam over the top rope! My God! That’s a 15-feet fall!
Wade Barrett: It could be a blessing in disguise for Breakker. Joining the Kiss My Ass Club will give him the opportunity to learn his trade from some of the business’ best minds – if he survives the beating he’s about to get, that is.
Mauro Ranallo: You’re enjoying yourself a little too much, here, Wade. Shane McMahon and Robert Roode are eager to throw Breakker back into the ring, while Reed is showing off in front of this hostile Eugene crowd. He’s about to resume his grim… Spear! Spear! Bron Breakker connects with a Spear out of nowhere! He hooks the leg… 1… 2… and Reed pushes him away! Wade Barrett: That would have been a disaster but I’ve got a feeling that whatever the outcome of this match, Bron Breakker will join the club tonight.
Mauro Ranallo: I think the best way to handle this for Breakker is to tackle one problem at a time. First, he needs a way back into this match and… Oh-oh! He’s going for the double-arm slam! But there’s no way in hell he can lift Reed… My God! He did it! He did it! Where does he get that strength from? Oh, but Reed lands on his feet… and he sends Breakker crashing down with a back body drop!
Wade Barrett: You see? That’s the problem with this kid. He’s strong as an ox but he’s way too flashy and now he’s going to pay for that lesson.
Mauro Ranallo: Loath as I am to admit it, you may be right Wade. Bronson Reed is setting him Bron Breakker on the top turnbuckle and I’ve got a feeling this isn’t going to end well. Reed gets to the second rope… Oh, no… Oh, my God! What a superplex! These two almost destroyed the ring!
Wade Barrett: Make no mistake, there is no limit to the amount of damage Bronson Reed is willing to inflict on himself or on this place in order to get the job done and that’s what makes him the perfect right-hand man for someone with a vision, like Shane McMahon.
Mauro Ranallo: And his vision is to have people literally kiss his ass on national television?!
Wade Barrett: You do not get it, Ranallo. Art is an imitation of life. This whole concept is disturbing because it says something about our society and the times we live in.
Mauro Ranallo: I have to admit that I hadn’t figure you out as a conceptual art fan. Regardless, Breaker and Reed are now slugging it out in the middle of the ring. Breakker is trying to feed off the crowd’s energy but will that be enough… each blow from Bronson Reed is like a charge of TNT exploding right against your skull… Breakker blocks the shot. What is he… Oh, no! That’s impossible! Overhead belly to belly suplex! What a feat of strength! I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything like that! Bron Breakker used Reed’s own weight against him!
Wade Barrett: Reed landed awkwardly! Somebody’s got to do something!
Mauro Ranallo: Breakker goes for the cover… that’s got to be it… Wait a minute! Bobby Roode is stepping in! Come on! Breakker saw him from the corner of eye, though. He’s there to greet him with a shoulder block… and another… and a third one! Roode is all over the place… Spear! Breakker almost cut him in half with that devastating move! I don’t think Roode will get another chance to interfere in this match. And Breakker finishes the job with a pop-up body toss over the top rope! That has got to hurt.
Wade Barrett: This guy really is a waste of space. He had one simple job to do and he couldn’t do it properly. He deserves the beating he got.
Mauro Ranallo: His sacrifice won precious seconds for Bronson Reed as Breakker goes for the pin… 1… 2… and a kick out. Who knows what might have been if Robert Roode had stayed away? Breakker now, just unleashing vicious forearm strikes to the face of the man who has been tormenting him for months. And all of sudden, Shane McMahon is looking a lot more nervous. Meanwhile, Breakker is picking up his opponent… he’s looking for another power move… but Reed falls back on his feet… he pushes Breakker away… and delivers a shattering Samoan drop!
Wade Barrett: Hear me out, here. This conflict hasn’t been doing anyone any favours. It put a stop to the club’s recruitment drive and Breakker has been beaten time and time again, by all sorts of people. If he joined the club willing, it would make it a force to be reckoned with. Mauro Ranallo: It’s a bit late for that, don’t you think? Reed is going to the ropes for momentum… I think he’s looking for a senton… Inside cradle by Breakker… 1… Reed kicks out immediately… Frankensteiner! After all the abuse, the pain and the punishment he endured, Bron Breakker still finds the energy to hit such a spectacular move!
Wade Barrett: That’s impossible! That’s physically impossible! There’s something fishy going on here!
Mauro Ranallo: Breakker is looking exhausted but he drops across Reed’s shoulders. That’s got to be it… 1… 2… 3… No! How did he do that? Bronson Reed lifted his shoulder at the last second. Hey! What a… Did you see that? He hit a low blow on the kick out! What a piece of trash!
Wade Barrett: You’re the only one in the arena who saw that, Ranallo. Calm down. If it happened, it was probably an accident. Reed isn’t that kind of guy.
Mauro Ranallo: You mean to tell me that someone who just beat down a man in his seventies wouldn’t low blow someone? Get a grip, please! This happened at the worst possible time, I’m afraid. Reed is in total control now, adding a couple of hard strikes to the liver for good measure. He’s setting him up… Back to belly piledriver! He just planted Breakker in the middle of the ring. When is he ever going to catch a break?
Wade Barrett: Try to remain positive. At least, he’s no longer holding his crotch.
Mauro Ranallo: Very clever. Reed is dragging Breakker closer to the corner for the inevitable exclamation point. Tsunami incoming… Reed goes up top… Oh, my God! Breakker got his boot up at the last second! But I think he twisted his knee in the process!
Wade Barrett: Who cares about his knee? He almost took Reed’s head off with that reckless move!
Mauro Ranallo: Gravity was Reed’s worst enemy in this particular instance. Both men are down but Breakker is trying to get back up. He’s favouring his right knee so that takes the Spear and the Gorilla Press out of the equation. Is there any way for him to… No, he’s not…? Bron Breakker is going for the Steiner Recliner! He’s got it locked in but what is going to give in first, his knee or Reed’s neck?
Wade Barrett: Come on! Do something Reed!
Mauro Ranallo: Bronson Reed can’t reach the ropes! Shane McMahon is trying to grab his hand but the referee is chasing him away! You can read the agony on both men’s faces. The pressure on Reed’s neck and back must be crushing but Breakker is having a hard time keeping his foot on the mat. Reed is raising his hand… Is he…? Yes! He taps out! Bron Breakker is the winner!
Wade Barrett: No! How did he let something like that happen? What a disaster! It’s the death of a dream!
Winner by pinfall: Bron Breakker in 12:18 | 66
PAY OFF
Mauro Ranallo: That’s a bit melodramatic, don’t you think, Wade?
Wade Barrett: What is he doing? He’s tying Bronson Reed to the ropes! This man is a hooligan!
Mauro Ranallo: That’s a bit unexpected but it seems that Shane McMahon has decided that this is also his cue to make himself scarce. He looks like he’s been shot from a cannonball.
Wade Barrett: I believe he’s right to err on the side of caution. Breakker obviously has a grudge with him. Who knows what he could do?
Mauro Ranallo: Oh-oh… Shotzi tripped him just as he was about to turn the corner of the ring. And judging by the look on Bron Breakker’s face, he won’t enjoy what’s next.
Wade Barrett: You mean is going to get away with that? Where are the WWE officials? Shane McMahon is a major stockholder in the company! He can’t be humiliated like that on live television!
Mauro Ranallo: You’re free to get up from your seat and help him. McMahon is pleading with Bron Breakker to let him off the hook but I don’t think… Oh! A big boot to the face of the prodigal son! This is definitely not going to end well. And Shane McMahon falls flat on his face after a Gorilla Press on the concrete floor.
Wade Barrett: Unfortunately, I have to stay at this table to inform the audience on what is going on but I really hope someone will find an ounce of decency within themselves and rescue this great man.
Mauro Ranallo: I wouldn’t count on it. Breakker is telling Shotzi to get a microphone. He’s not done here…
Bron Breakker: I told you there would be hell to pay for what you did to me and to my friends. Now, it’s time for your mouth to cash the checks written by your ass. First, you will disband that stupid club of yours.
[Without waiting for an answer, Breakker puts Shane McMahon through the Steiner Recliner.]
Shane McMahon: Alright! Alright! You son of a bitch! I’ll make you pay for disrespecting my father’s legacy!
Bron Breakker: We’re not done. Now, you’re going to add me to the WWE Championship match at Extreme Rules.
Shane McMahon: Are you crazy? I can’t do that!
Bron Breakker: Yes, you can! You’re the boss’ brother! You can do whatever you want – that’s what you kept saying when you were pulling your pants down on TV. I won’t ask you twice!
[Breakker pulls harder on McMahon’s neck.]
Shane McMahon: Arg! Stop it! You’re on! Please, let me go!
Wade Barrett: This is absolutely disgusting. The son of the greatest promoter of all time has been humiliated in front of the world and people are cheering. After all Shane McMahon has done for wrestling, this is no way to treat him.
Mauro Ranallo: What are you talking about, Wade? Bron Breakker will be competing against Seth Freakin’ Rollins and Roman Reigns in a triple threat match for the WWE Championship at Extreme Rules! That’s the big story! This young man is one win away from his first major championship in WWE!
Wade Barrett: Pah! He’s got delusions of grandeur! Reigns and Rollins will wipe the floor with him. | 67
NEWS FROM THE ASYLUM
Mauro Ranallo: We’re back from the break and this place is still buzzing with the news that Bron Breakker will join the cast of the WWE Championship match at Extreme Rules, less than two weeks from now.
Wade Barrett: This man is a bully. He did nothing to deserve to be in this. He’s cutting corners but I can guarantee that this will blow in his face.
Mauro Ranallo: Alright, let’s all cool down here. Earlier today, we received another video from our broadcast colleague Cathy Kelley, who has set herself on a path to understand what happened to the man known as Bray Wyatt and his hellish alter ego. So far, her search has raised even more questions but she isn’t one to be so easily deterred. Here’s what she sent.
[Kelly has grown a little more skilled with the digital camera. The Undertaker cuts an even darker figure against the grey Massachusetts sky.]
Cathy Kelley: Sir, I… I’m not sure I want to get back in there.
The Undertaker: You have no idea what you’re dealing with but you will… eventually.
Cathy Kelley: What’s the point of all this? We’ve been there three times…
[The video is replaced by static. When the image returns, it seems to have gone back a few seconds.]
Cathy Kelley: What’s the point of all this? We’ve been there two times already and I can’t make anything out of what I saw.
The Undertaker: There are some powerful forces at work here but if you leave now, how will you ever be able to make your way out of the dark?
[Kelley sighs heavily and they start making their way towards the asylum but, again, the video is tampered with… they sometimes walk in rapid motion while other times, they stand still for several seconds. A creepy burst of laughter can be heard in the background. They finally get inside the lobby which, again, looks different. The camera stops on a message written on the opposite wall in what looks like blood letters: who killed the world?]
Cathy Kelley: What is it?
The Undertaker: You have to understand one thing. I am not here as a guide but as a ferryman. My role is to make sure that you can navigate the darkness around you but whatever knowledge you come out of this place with will be your own.
Cathy Kelley: [Throwing the camera.] I’m done with this! This is too much for me! The only thing I’ve learned here is that Corbin and Cross were in cahoots with Bray Wyatt before he came back to the WWE but that doesn’t make any sense!
The Undertaker: You learned a lot more than that. You took a peek into their souls. Their fears and hopes and despair and cravings fed your head. So certain you are that they were talking with Bray Wyatt. Let me tell you one thing: the WWE is a place where the veil between the possible and the impossible is the thinnest – although it’s not the only one. Along the years, many different creatures have made it their home.
Cathy Kelley: [Picking up her camera.] What the… It says I recorded another video today but this is the first time I’m using it today. It wasn’t there a moment ago. What is going on?
[There’s a thumping sound coming from upstairs. Kelley turns the camera to the Undertaker, who remains expressionless. She finally goes to a nearby flight of stairs. She tries to turn the lights on but they don’t work. The creaking sound of the wooden stairs can he heard as the video fades to dark.] | 96
JORDYNNE GRACE vs BIANCA BELAIR
vs 
Samantha Irvin: The following contest is set for one fall. Introducing first, from Austin Texas… Jordynne Grace!
Mauro Ranallo: Here’s one young woman with a lot on her chest. Ever since she made her WWE debut, Jordynne Grace has been the target of some very unfair comments from Bianca Belair.
Wade Barrett: What’s unfair about speaking your mind? This snowflake generation really is something. If she isn’t happy with what others may think of her, maybe she should look harder in the mirror.
Samantha Irvin: And her opponent… making her way to the ring… from Knoxville, Tennessee… She is the EST of WWE… Bianca Belair!
Mauro Ranallo: Bianca’s comments were way out of line and you know it, Wade. What’s more, Grace has been very disappointed with the way the former RAW Women’s champion conducted herself in the ring.
Wade Barrett: And who is she to judge her? Bianca Belair has taught her some valuable lessons for which she should be grateful. The gall of these young people…
Mauro Ranallo: But you just said…?! Never mind. The bell’s ringing and Belair starts this match with a few… chosen words for her opponent. Wait a minute! Did you see that? Jordynne Grace made a bee line to Belair and delivered a massive Michinoku driver! The referee’s making the count! 1… 2… Belair kicks out!
Wade Barrett: And she talks about respect?! This is no way to treat a lady like Bianca Belair! She’s trying to cheat her way to the top. How shocking!
Mauro Ranallo: I think she was right to come out with all gun blazing but Bianca Belair is no slouch herself and she kills Grace’s momentum with that jawbreaker. Bianca looks upset… Fallaway slam! And another! Is she going for a third one! Yes, she does! She’s been tossing Grace all over the ring and now she’s going to unload… Oh! Grace blocks the left hand… and she connects with a headbutt!
Wade Barrett: This isn’t a street fight! What is she trying to prove?
Mauro Ranallo: I think the disdain on these two ladies’ faces says it all, really. Grace sweeps Belair’s legs… Oh, what a kick to the side of the head! Belair’s down! Grace hooks the leg… 1… 2… No, it’s way too soon for that. And look at the frustration in Grace’s eyes as she starts pummelling Biance Belair! My God, this is turning into a very ugly fight. Belair’s not moving anymore but Grace is climbing down the ring, looking for something… She setting up a table!
Wade Barrett: How original! Maybe she should get herself a personality. This is a joke.
Mauro Ranallo: Jordynne Grace is climbing back up… Oh, wow! Bianca Belair regained her bearings and using her tremendous athleticism, she kicked Grace off the apron and through the table with her patented single-leg dropkick! Grace went against her own nature here, trying something edgier but it backfired.
Wade Barrett: That’s the difference between a natural like Belair and a weight-lifter like Grace. She will never be on her level.
Mauro Ranallo: For the record, I don’t think anyone is disputing Belair’s place at the very top of the women’s division but in recent weeks, her actions have been rather classless but that’s a debate for another time. Belair hops down the ring and starts working on Jordynne Grace’s jaw with a series of hard punches. Oh, my God, this is hard to watch. Grace can’t defend herself. Wade Barrett: If it’d been the other way around, you’d be the first to applaud her aggression. You’re a hypocrite, Ranallo.
Mauro Ranallo: I resent that comment. Grace is bleeding from the mouth as Bianca Belair is carrying her back to the ring. She stops on the way though… What does she have in mind? Oh! Down goes Jordynne Grace as Belair delivers a merciless Glam Slam on the concrete floor! This could be it! Is there any way back from such a massive blow? She is completely destroying her opponent.
Wade Barrett: All Jordynne had to do was to graciously accept her defeat at Bad Blood. She decided to turn this feud up a notch and now it’s coming back to bite her in the ass. Well-deserved, if you ask me.
Mauro Ranallo: Bianca Belair is taking some time to show off her impressive physique, even though this crowd doesn’t seem too happy to see her dominate this matchup. She seems to be ready to resume her grim work as… Oh! A grab toe-hold by Grace sends her crashing head-first into the steel post! She acted out of instinct but this still takes some tremendous awareness to turn over such a dire situation. Grace is trying to shake the cobwebs but she’s still hurting from that fall through the table.
Wade Barrett: She’s out of her depth and she knows it. She took Belair by surprise but she won’t be able to sustain any momentum.
Mauro Ranallo: Apparently, Jordynne Grace didn’t read your script. She picks up Belair and puts her through a bear hug, shaking her around like a ragdoll. Belair, trying to get free as Grace sucks up the air from her lungs… she lands an elbow on the bridge of her nose… and Jordynne Grace, using Belair’s back as a battering ram, runs into the steel post! This is a side of her we have never seen before!
Wade Barrett: You didn’t know she’s a bitter witch who’d rather end her opponent’s career than admit she’s second best?
Mauro Ranallo: Belair is thrown unceremoniously back in the ring but Grace has to take a time out to wipe the blood off her face. So far, both Belair and Grace have tried everything to get the better of one another but every time someone hits a high-impact move, the other wills herself out of trouble. Grace is going back in… Spear! Bianca Belair hits a Spear just as Jordynne Grace was on the apron!
Wade Barrett: Unfortunately, she didn’t get all of it or this match would be over now.
Mauro Ranallo: Indeed, Grace is already back on her feet. She’s pulling herself back together and she moves towards the ring… Belair is trying to lift her by the hair… but Grace counters with a Guillotine! This is all the distraction she needed to finally get back between the ropes. She’s setting up Belair for the Grace Driver! Oh, a thumb to the eyes and Belair escapes an unenviable fate. Grace rushes on now… Alley Oop by Belair.
Wade Barrett: She’s in perfect position! It’s time to end this!
Mauro Ranallo: Bianca Belair is climbing up the ropes… She’s finding her balance… 450 Splash! Oh, but there’s nobody home! Grace had rolled away. She quickly gets back to her feet… and she connects with the Vader Bomb! This has got to be it! 1… 2… 3… No! Belair grabs the rope at the very last second! That’s incredible!
Wade Barrett: Ha! She had me worried there for one second but the cream always rises to the top.
Mauro Ranallo: Jordynne Grace is looking desperate but arguing with the referee about the count will not get her the win she’s craving for. Meanwhile… Hey! What’s Bianca doing? What did she take from her pants? That’s a brass knuckle! Grace picks her up… She goes for the Grace Driver again… No! Belair hits her on the side of the head with the brass knuckle! Come on! 1… 2… 3… It’s over.
Wade Barrett: What did I tell you?
Winner by pinfall: Bianca Belair in 9:05 | 71
POST-MATCH BEATDOWN
Mauro Ranallo: You can’t be serious, Wade! Every time Bianca Belair finds herself in a difficult situation, she cheats her way out of trouble. It’s such a shame! A champion of her calibre doesn’t need that.
Wade Barrett: That’s one thing we can agree on! She doesn’t need to but she does it anyway because she wants to teach Jordynne Grace a lesson.
Mauro Ranallo: She still seems to be in a bad mood, pulling off as the referee raises her arm. Well, she can’t be pleased with herself after that display but… Oh, no. Belair, like a rabid dog, is going back to work on Grace, unloading her rage and frustration on her!
Wade Barrett: Nobody likes it but sometimes, you have to beat your dog down if you want to make sure he won’t make the same mistakes over and over again. That dumb broad kept attacking Bianca! She simply has to put her down!
Mauro Ranallo: She can’t even defend herself! The referee is trying to pull Belair away but she’s gone completely berserk. Ugh… this is… this is just painful to watch, Jordynne Grace’s face now a bloody mess. Belair picks her up… and she delivers a KOD over the top rope! My God! That’s a 15-feet fall! Belair’s out of her mind!
Wade Barrett: That’s one way to say, good riddance. Let’s hope this time, she will remember her place – when she comes back from injury, that is. | 71
COLOUR BLIND
[Mauro Ranallo picks up a microphone and makes his way to the ring.]
Mauro Ranallo: Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome my guest at this time, the CEO of the WWE… The Game… Triple H!
[Triple H’s music hits and he makes his entrance to a huge pop.]
Mauro Ranallo: Thanks for answering my questions, Hunter.
Triple H: Thanks for having me.
Mauro Ranallo: Hunter, earlier this week, you said some things that didn’t go so well with some members of the WWE universe and I believe you wanted to address that. First, can you tell us what this controversy is all about.
Triple H: Of course, Mauro. You see, I was representing the company at a charity event when a man who presented himself as a journalist asked me about what he perceived as a ‘lack’ of Black athletes within the company. Obviously, this is a very sensitive matter but I decided to answer truthfully. For me, there is no ‘colour issue’. I don’t think of our talents as members of ethnic or social groups but rather as human beings and, as a company, we do try our best to put them in the best…
[MVP’s music hits as he comes down the ramp, along with B-FAB.]
B-FAB: Please, cut the crap! I’m going to throw up!
Mauro Ranallo: If you don’t mind, we’re in the middle of an interview.
Triple H: No, let them come, Mauro. We should get this out in the open. I have nothing to hide.
MVP: Do you? You see, that’s the problem there: you see nothing wrong with your comments.
B-FAB: If you’re colour blind, as you say you are, that means you don’t understand what’s happening in the country.
Triple H: I don’t understand where you anger comes from. There’s no discrimination in the WWE. We’re an equal-opportunity company.
MVP: Are you, really? Let’s have a look at the recent challengers for the top titles in WWE: Bray Wyatt, Drew McIntyre, AJ Styles, Butch, Sheamus, Sami Zayn and I’ve saved the best for last Gunther. I believe they all have something in common but I don’t see what it is… hmmm, let me think.
Triple H: Come on. It’s just a coincidence.
MVP: Oh, I’m sorry! You see B-FAB, it’s not racial disparity – it’s just bad luck.
Triple H: Listen, I don’t make the matches, that’s the GMs responsibility but…
MVP: Oh, the GMs… you mean Mick Foley and Adam Pearce – who happen to be white.
Triple H: I don’t think you can suspect Adam to have any kind of connection with Gunther.
MVP: Then how come Montez Ford, who’s one of the best athletes of his generation, doesn’t get a title match? Let me answer this: because he doesn’t want a black man representing SmackDown. Or maybe because someone told him they don’t want that. Triple H: Don’t be ridiculous. You know me!
MVP: I know you as the man who told Booker T ‘people like him’ don’t win championships.
[The arena goes silent for a moment.]
Triple H: It was…
MVP: What was it? A different time? We heard that before. A ‘storyline’? As a black man, I’m still waiting to be entertained. Where’s Booker, by the way? Oh, yes. He works as an announcer on a B show because Pat McAfee is just so much better – and he’s a white man.
Triple H: Have you ever considered the possibility that you’re the one who’s prejudiced?
MVP: But those are facts, not opinions! If you really don’t care about colour, why don’t you make me the new RAW General Manager?
Triple H: Er… because I can’t fire someone who’s done nothing wrong just to appease you.
MVP: Excuse me? The man who’s suffering from multiple personality disorder and whose persona you made a GM couldn’t be bothered to show up for weeks ‘has done nothing wrong’? Are you kidding me?
Triple H: Still, I can’t give you the job just because you asked. It doesn’t work like that.
MVP: Then let’s do it the old-fashioned way. Find yourself a champion and I’ll find myself a challenger. If I win not only will you name me the new RAW General Manager but you will resign from your position as CEO.
Triple H: Ha! That will be all? You don’t want my car or my house too? Why would I accept such a ridiculous challenge?
MVP: Because if you don’t, you will have to resign anyway. Your wife can only protect you for so long. What would happen if this story was kept in the news for weeks or months? The shareholders would ask for your head. If you beat my guy, you have my word we won’t bring this issue ever again. Hey, I’ll even sign an agreement. This would be the last time you hear about it.
Triple H: [Thinking intensely.] Alright. You’re on. But be careful what you wish for.
MVP: History and justice are on our side. You can’t win.
[Triple H walks away with a stern look on his face as, in the ring, Ranallo glances a puzzled look at MVP.] | 67
SECOND THOUGHTS
[Backstage, Cactus Jack is hanging with Ilja Dragunov.]
Cactus Jack: You know Ilja, I’ve been thinking long and hard about you and your situation and from the bottom of my heart, I really think you need a different kind of challenge. You’ve been going through a lot of abuse these past few weeks and that can’t be good for you.
Ilja Dragunov: What’s good for me is what will make me a hardcore legend.
Cactus Jack: You never told me why you decided to trod that path in the first place.
Ilja Dragunov: That’s because…
Cactus Jack: No! Don’t tell me! Not yet. We’re not done by a long shot. Tonight, I’ve got something else for you. Come here, please.
[EC3 comes into the frame.]
Cactus Jack: You wouldn’t believe it but this man had it all at one point in his career and now, he’s the closest thing you’ll ever find to a wrestling bum. He’s so desperate for another chance that he would accept any gig.
EC3: That’s correct. I won’t deny it.
Cactus Jack: In a different way, he is hardcore too. I want you to team with him and see just how much pain he is willing to endure for one more minute in the spotlight, in the hope that one fan, one person will remember his name when they leave this arena.
EC3: Kid, I’d like to say that in my case, this is only temporary. I will use every opportunity to climb up the ladder and then I will call the shots. I will be in control of my own narrative.
Cactus Jack: That’s what they all say. Don’t take your eyes off him Ilja and you will learn a lot about the depths of human nature. [He comes closer to the camera.] And you, I have a favour to ask of you although I know I don’t deserve it. Please, don’t push them. Don’t encourage them to do anything dangerous or stupid because this is not what they need right now. They need to be protected and cared for. Good luck out there.
[Dragunov and EC3 walk away while Jack winks at the camera.] | 68
LOS LOTHARIOS vs EC3 AND ILJA DRAGUNOV
Samantha Irvin: The following contest is a tag team match set for one fall and it is a hardcore match. Introducing first, from Monterrey, Mexico… at a combine weight of 425 pounds… Humberto and Angel Garza… Los Lotharios!
Mauro Ranallo: Wade, Angel and Humberto are not exactly the first persons you would think of when the word ‘hardcore’ is mentioned.
Wade Barrett: Beggars can’t be choosers, Ranallo. Los Lotharios haven’t been doing so well recently and they need a win to turn a corner – any win. And who knows, their high-flying ability could prove to be an x-factor here.
Samantha Irvin: And their opponents… making their way to the ring… first, from Palm Springs, Florida… weighing in at 210 pounds… Ethan Carter III… EC3! And his tag team partner… from Moscow, Russia… weighing in at 210 pounds… Ilja Dragunov!
Mauro Ranallo: What an odd pairing this is but once again EC3 finds a way to feature on RAW. I think you have to give him credit for his determination.
Wade Barrett: Quite frankly, I don’t have much time for either of these losers. EC3 had the whole world in his hands and he dropped the ball. As for Dragunov, he’s a midget who wouldn’t be out of place in the indies.
Mauro Ranallo: Charming, as ever. Dragunov and Angel will get things underway as they lock-up in the middle of the ring. These two men are sound technicians and right off the bat, they’re trying every trick in the book to get an advantage. Angel goes to the mat with no success… Angel… Oh! What a chop! Did you hear that sound?
Wade Barrett: Dragunov himself probably got a kick out of that. He’s a glutton for punishment anyway.
Mauro Ranallo: Dragunov, as defiant as ever, is daring Angel to hit him again. Angel is backing off… Superkick! Angel is a lot of things but predictable definitely isn’t one of them. He looks pretty pleased with himself as… Oh, wow! Dragunov hits back with a superkick of his own! This match is already going back and forth already like a deadly pendulum!
Wade Barrett: Dijak did quite a number on Dragunov last week. He won’t last for long in a tit for tat.
Mauro Ranallo: He’s built his reputation on being indestructible so that remains to be seen. Meanwhile, Dragunov won’t let up and he connects with a vicious forearm across Angel’s… Oh! Are you kidding me? Angel delivered another superkick to Dragunov as he was still reeling from that headshot!
Wade Barrett: Unfortunately, he didn’t get all of it but that’s a lesson to remember. Angel has the quickness to take advantage of any opening, no matter how small.
Mauro Ranallo: We are about to witness the first tag of this match as Humberto joins the fray. Humberto immediately tries to stomp a hole in Dragunov’s chest. And Humberto, mocking Dragunov… but turning his back on someone as crafty may not be such a good idea… Low blow by Dragunov! And remember folks, this is all legal under hardcore rules!
Wade Barrett: It maybe legal but it’s tasteless nonetheless. Dragunov showing once again that he doesn’t belong here. Mauro Ranallo: You’re not the first to question his stature. For most of his career, Dragunov has been told that he would never make it as a wrestler, that he was too small but I think there is no questioning the size of his heart. He’s making his way to his corner, where EC3 is waiting... Yes! In comes EC3, a kendo stick in hand!
Wade Barrett: These guys don’t know how to fight fair, it would seem.
Mauro Ranallo: EC3 is looking like a man possessed! Roundhouse kick from Humberto but EC3 dodges the blow… He goes directly to the opposite corner and knocks Angel down with powerful strike. Humberto is waiting for him on the top turnbuckle… EC3 turns around… Missile dropkick… Oh, my God! EC3 caught him in mid-air and the stick just exploded in a million wooden fragments! I can only imagine the damage it did to Humberto’s ribs.
Wade Barrett: You can see the size of the chip on this guy’s shoulder by the way he hits his opponents.
Mauro Ranallo: EC3 is ready to apply the finish touch but Angel Garza is sneaking back in… Torpedo Moscow! Dragunov rushed across the ring and knocked him out for good. EC3 with the One Percent… 1… 2… 3! This is it! EC3 and Ilja Dragunov make short work of Los Lotharios tonight!
Wade Barrett: Completely unfair match and result. Los Lotharios are being punished for being nice guys, basically. Maybe MVP is right and Mick Foley is abusing his power as a General Manager.
Winners by pinfall: EC3 and Ilja Dragunov in 5:58 | 62
NOX HAS HAD IT
 
[Backstage, Mustafa Ali is looking for someone when he bumps into Tegan Nox.]
Mustafa Ali: Ah, just the person I was looking for! I wanted to talk to you about my investigation…
Tegan Nox: Look, Mustafa, thanks for all the work you did but I don’t want to talk about it anymore.
Mustafa Ali: Ok, I realise my first efforts were… well, I got it wrong a couple of times but these things take time. But there’s a silver lining: since I’m on the case, the gifts have stopped.
[Without saying a word, Nox produces a bottle of expensive-looking perfume with a card attached.]
Mustafa Ali: That’s good news actually! A new gift means new clues!
Tegan Nox: I really think we’re not on the same wavelength here, Mustafa. This is just a game to you. You’re having fun. I’m afraid! You don’t seem to realise that when you’re a woman, there’s a lot of challenges to overcome if you want to make it to the top. Do you think my relatives were happy when I told them I wanted to be a wrestler? My grandad was the only one to support me. Twelve years later, if I look at where I’m at, I can’t hope to get a match against Charlotte or Asuka, let alone a title match. I really don’t need that kind of distraction. Do you understand?
Mustafa Ali: I get it, Tegan, believe me. We had victimology classes at the Chicago PD and…
Tegan Nox: Ok, I give up. You’re not listening. I’m going home. Maybe it’s time for me to get back home in a more literal sense.
[Ali watches on as she walks away, muttering under his breath.]
Mustafa Ali: I’ll prove myself to you. | 64
CELEBRATION TIME
Samantha Irvin: Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome… Austin Theory and WWE Hall of Famer, Trish Stratus!
Mauro Ranallo: Trish Stratus came back from a lengthy injury lay-off to help her man not only survive but win a spectacular inferno match against Lance Archer, last week on RAW. They seem to be ready to turn a new leaf and we know from past interviews that Stratus has big plans for her protégé.
Wade Barrett: I’ll be perfectly honest with you, I wasn’t very comfortable with Archer hitting a woman. I don’t mind a bit of an edge but he was taking it too far. Having said that, I’m not sure he deserved to be thrown into that pit.
Mauro Ranallo: I suppose he got what was coming to him. Now, let’s hear what Theory and Stratus have to say.
[Stratus is all over Theory, licking, scratching and biting him as she takes the mic off his hands.]
Trish Stratus: You know Lance Archer, you should never have messed with me. Because when she was on her hospital bed, Mommy asked her baby to show you… real… pain. She asked him to make you suffer, suffer bad.
Austin Theory: You call me a kid, you get your ass handed to you. You hit my woman, you end up a human torch on live television. So, how was your week, tough guy, eh? I’m pretty sure mine was better!
Trish Stratus: You know what, baby? Let’s not talk about the bad man. Mommy doesn’t like him. What Mommy likes is gold.
Austin Theory: And what Mommy wants, Mommy gets.
Trish Stratus: Mommy would really… really like that shiny belt that Roman Reigns is carrying on his shoulder.
Austin Theory: Let me tell you something, Reigns…
[Lance Archer’s music hits.]
Mauro Ranallo: They look like they’ve seen a ghost. And quite understandably, I think…
Wade Barrett: Look out, Ranallo… He’s coming this way!
Mauro Ranallo: My God! What a hideous freak! His stay in the fire pit didn’t do him any favour! Trish and Austin need to turn around!
Wade Barrett: It’s too late! He’s already in the ring!
Mauro Ranallo: Stratus is bolting out of dodge while Theory covers her exit… but there’s a price to pay! Blackout on Austin Theory. He’s out but… what is Archer looking for? That’s a pair of handcuffs! Theory is tied to the ring post. He can’t defend himself!
Wade Barrett: Stratus is calling for help but she won’t dare going anywhere near the Murderhawk Monster!
Mauro Ranallo: And who could blame her? We need help! Archer left a bag near the ring. What kind of… Oh, no. It’s a bottle of fuel and a torch. I think I understand what he has in mind. He’s going to breath fire onto Austin Theory! He’s out of his mind! Wade Barrett: What a sick, sadistic bastard. Theory can’t even defend himself.
Mauro Ranallo: Trish Stratus is frantically looking for a fire extinguisher while that psychopath is torturing Austin Theory. He’s going to lit the torch.
Wade Barrett: I think Theory is daring him to do it. He might be brave but that’s not something I would recommend.
Mauro Ranallo: My Lord, he’s going to do it! Somebody… Nooo! Lance Archer just torched Austin Theory! He belongs in… Chad Gable! Chad Gable is here with a fire extinguisher! He hit Archer in the midsection… Oh, and what a blow to the head! Archer is busted open! Gable throws the extinguisher on the mat. Archer is retreating but look at that glimmer in his eye! He’s enjoying every second of it!
Wade Barrett: He’s a psychopath! This is way over the line!
Mauro Ranallo: Trish Stratus is putting the fire away as the paramedics… No! No, dammit! Lance Archer is attacking the paramedics as they rush on to help Austin Theory! What kind of a lowlife would do something like that!
Wade Barrett: He’s on a tear! Somebody’s got to stop him! He’s going to murder someone!
Mauro Ranallo: We’re going off for a short break. Bear with us ladies and gentlemen! | 61
TOMMASO CIAMPA vs KEVIN OWENS
 vs
Samantha Irvin: The following contest is set for one fall. Introducing first, accompanied to the ring by Johnny Gargano… from Milwaukee, Wisconsin… weighing in at 208 pounds… Tommaso Ciampa!
Mauro Ranallo: For weeks now, #DIY have tried to drive a wedge between the RAW Tag Team champions and it seems their hard work is about to pay off.
Wade Barrett: Do they really need it anyway? Ciampa has made a name for himself in NXT. He’s got the grit and know-how to beat anyone on this roster. All he needed was the will to go for gold and it seems his renewed alliance with Gargano was the missing piece of the jigsaw.
Samantha Irvin: And his opponent… from Marieville, Quebec, Canada… weighing in at 242 pounds… he is one half of the RAW Tag Team champions… ‘The Prize Fighter’… Kevin Owens!
Mauro Ranallo: Kevin Owens stands alone tonight amid speculation about the state of his relationship with Sami Zayn. He was at ringside for Zayn’s match but it seems Sami didn’t return the favour.
Wade Barrett: These two have been beating the crap out of each other for 15 years at least. Their team was bound to implode sooner or later. You’re a fool if you thought otherwise. The only question is: who’s going to backstab the other first?
Mauro Ranallo: Ciampa and Owens locked in a stare down and you can bet your last penny that one name is on their lips, Sami Zayn’s. Ciampa goes for a right hand but Owens blocks it and… Oh! Clothesline! And just like that, KO sends Ciampa crashing down on the mat! Owens, mocking his opponent, daring him to get back up and Ciampa duly obliges. This is it! Both men are unloading on each other in the middle of the ring!
Wade Barrett: It’s fairly obvious that these two have a lot of disdain for each other. They both fancy themselves as tough guys but tonight, only one will emerge victorious.
Mauro Ranallo: Owens pushes Ciampa away and once again, he finds himself on the floor. Owens doesn’t waste any time… he’s already on Ciampa’s back, choking him with the bottom rope! Kevin Owens’ temper has been running shorter and shorter and it looks like he wants Ciampa to pay the price of his recent cheekiness. Referee Dan Engler is considering breaking the hold but a quick glance from Owens convinced to step back.
Wade Barrett: He has to protect Ciampa or this match could turn ugly. Someone like Owens is as dangerous and vicious as they come under normal circumstances. You have to keep him on a short leash.
Mauro Ranallo: Ciampa isn’t the kind to ask for help, though. He’s looking for a way out on his own… grabbing Owens’ hand… Oh! He’s trying to pull Owens’ arm out of its socket! I don’t know if he succeeded but that was enough to get free. Owens seems to be favouring his right arm at the moment and this could be a game-changer if he can’t use it properly from now on.
Wade Barrett: This is what makes Tommaso Ciampa a particularly dangerous individual. When it comes to inflicting pain on an opponent, his imagination is limitless. You can see Owens didn’t expect that. Mauro Ranallo: Meanwhile, Ciampa has positioned himself behind Owens… Knee strike! And another! Kevin Owens took his eye off the prize and Ciampa is taking advantage now with these hard-hitting shots to the back and to the face. Owens is rocked as Ciampa is about to make a third pass… but Owens springs back to life with an explosive clothesline! Both men are lying in the middle of the ring now but Owens’ stirring… Oh, I think he’s trying to apply the Kimura lock! If he manages to lock it in, it could be game over of Tommaso Ciampa!
Wade Barrett: Ciampa is thrashing about like his life depended on it but, truth be told, I don’t think he’s even got to win this match. All #DIY have to do is to keep pushing Owens’ buttons, wait for the inevitable title match and watch the champions implode in front of them.
Mauro Ranallo: Surviving this bout might prove the most difficult part of the equation though. Ciampa has finally regained his footing… and he rams Owens into the corner! What a display of strength and athleticism from Ciampa, who gives away several pounds to his opponent. Owens is made of sterner stuff though and he starts pounding Ciampa’s back… a knee to the midsection and he finally gets free, pushing his opponent away.
Wade Barrett: You can see he’s already losing whatever temper he had. This man has been dealing with anger management issues for a long, long time.
Mauro Ranallo: Owens bounces off the ropes… He’s going for the Stunner! But Ciampa did his homework… he pushes him away and hits back with a vicious elbow to the back of the head, killing Owens’ momentum. I think he really hit him hard here. Owens is out cold. Ciampa could go for the pin right now but it looks like he’s got something else in mind.
Wade Barrett: He’s looking to inflict more damage and more destruction on Owens. That’s a sound strategy. This match is meaningless. He’s just here to make sure the champions don’t begin the match at one hundred percent and Ciampa is the right man for that kind of job.
Mauro Ranallo: Ciampa climbs down the ring and resume working on Owens’ right arm, pulling his shoulder against the steel post. I can only imagine the kind of pain he’s in at the moment, even more so if he did dislocate his arm socket earlier. And Ciampa, obviously pleased with himself, takes a break from his grim task to taunt Owens.
Wade Barrett: It’s well-executed plan. Ciampa always had a superior ring IQ.
Mauro Ranallo: He’s turning around to face the fans who aren’t too happy with his antics… Watch out! Owens managed to wrap his left arm around his throat and he’s taking closer and closer to the post. Ciampa is struggling but he can’t break Owens’ bear-like grip! Gargano… Oh, no! Johnny Gargano sneaked from behind and kicked the injured shoulder of Kevin Owens. Ciampa is free but he’s having a hard time breathing in.
Wade Barrett: Chokeholds are very dangerous and the referee didn’t do his job properly here.
Mauro Ranallo: It could be argued that Gargano’s interference could have cost Ciampa the match. Owens drops down but Ciampa is already taking advantage of the confusion. He’s got a chair in hand! Ciampa with the chair… Oh! Owens dodges the shot and he hits back with a kick to the abdomen! Did you see that? Pumphandle neckbreaker! He literally crushed Ciampa’s neck here!
Wade Barrett: The referee is losing control of this match. He needs to bring everyone back in the ring, pronto.
Mauro Ranallo: Kevin Owens is looking exhausted but Tommaso Ciampa isn’t moving at all. Meanwhile, Johnny Gargano is trying to convince the referee to step in. This match is descending into utter chaos. Owens makes his way to Ciampa…
Wade Barrett: He looks like he doesn’t know what he’s going to do! Mauro Ranallo: Oh-oh! He grabs him by the throat again… and starts punching him in the face! This is getting serious, Ciampa can’t defend himself! Ciampa is searching frantically for something that could get him out of this predicament… Oh, my God! He picked up the steel chair and smashed Owens right across the face! How did the referee miss that!
Wade Barrett: He’s busy talking with Gargano, apparently. What a clown.
Mauro Ranallo: Owens hanging on as Ciampa wraps an arm around his shoulders… DDT on the steel steps! Did you hear that horrible thud! That has got to be it! Owens is out! All that’s left for Ciampa is to drag his carcass back into the ring to win this match.
Wade Barrett: Easier said than done, though. Owens weighs nearly 250 pounds and Ciampa went through a lot of punishment already.
Mauro Ranallo: You’re right. Lifting that kind of dead weight is no mean feat but Ciampa is within touching distance of victory. That was a weird contest and one that will only make their future title match, if and when it happens, even more intense. He’s finally done it. Ciampa with the cover… Wait a minute! Roll-up! Owens with the roll-up! 1… 2… 3! Owens was playing possum!
Wade Barrett: He steals one tonight and he can even afford the satisfaction to give Ciampa the finger as he runs away backstage but, result aside, I think #DIY will be the happier of the two teams tonight.
Winner by pinfall: Kevin Owens in 9:55 | 77
NEXT WEEK
Mauro Ranallo: Ladies and gentlemen, huge news regarding next week’s Monday Night RAW: Lance Archer will face Chad Gable inside a steel cage! The Murderhawk Monster wants his pound of flesh and Gable’s rescue earlier tonight could turn out to be a suicidal move.
Wade Barrett: Gable’s Napoleon complex has been dragging on for years. He obviously feels he’s got something to prove but this time, his opponent won’t be as merciful as some of those he’s faced before.
Mauro Ranallo: Still next week, five days removed from Extreme Rules, a massive 8-man tag team will take place on RAW and while the identities of some of the participants remain to be confirmed, rumour has it that Randy Orton, John Morrison and the Tag Team champions could be involved.
Wade Barrett: Lots of egos, lots of unfinished business and a lot at stake – that’s the recipe for a match that will degenerate into utter violence sooner rather than later. The perfect rehearsal for Extreme Rules!
Mauro Ranallo: Iyo Sky will also be in action against Piper Niven in a non-title match. Fresh from her unsuccessful Women’s Tag Team Championship challenge, will Niven carry on with her excellent singles form or will the RAW Women’s champion respond to Charlotte’s challenge with a win?
Wade Barrett: Bayley and Charlotte have, quite simply, refused to acknowledge Iyo Sky as their champion but this has been going on for way too long. Niven will test Sky to the limit as they are as different as fire and ice but I fully expect the champion to retain at Extreme Rules.
Mauro Ranallo: Last but not least, it has been confirmed: Dexter Lumis and Shinsuke Nakamura will do battle in a dog collar match! It seems the King of Strong Style chose this stipulation himself and it promises to be a very intriguing matchup.
Wade Barrett: Nakamura’s behaviour has been erratic at best. He’s been picking up fights with pretty much everyone in sight while appearing on live television under the influence of alcohol. At this stage, he’s pretty much a wreck of a human being and while I have no love lost of Lumis, I really hope he puts him in his place – for good. | 60
THE MAN FROM ANOTHER PLACE
Mauro Ranallo: It’s almost time for our main event but before we get to that, we have just enough to air another video from our colleague Cathy Kelley. We’ve been told that this one is… disturbing though, so parental discretion may be advised. Roll on the footage, please.
[The camera shows the derelict and poorly-lit corridors of the asylum. The only things that can be heard is a weird humming in the background, as well as Kelley’s and The Undertaker’s footsteps. They reach another video room, like they did the previous weeks.]
The Undertaker: There lie your answers, Cathy Kelley.
Cathy Kelley: Alright… hey, wait a minute! How would you know that?
The Undertaker: This is not the first time I have been here.
Cathy Kelley: What? And why didn’t you tell me?
The Undertaker: You have to find out for yourself. See for yourself through the darkness. You needed to peer into that other place.
Cathy Kelley: Did you go there after your mother were killed in that fire?
[The Undertaker just points silently at a videotape. Kelley sighs, puts down the camera and turns the screen on. Bray Wyatt is sitting at the same table the others did. The figure of a man can be seen in the shadows.]
Man in the shadows: What is your name?
Bray Wyatt: You already know my name.
Man in the shadows: Who are you?
Bray Wyatt: You know who I am. I am the man who saved you from Him. I am your…
Man in the shadows: Shut up! Where have you been all this time?
Bray Wyatt: I spent some time in that… other place, with Him. I know you feel…
Man in the shadows: Shut up! You don’t get to tell me how I feel! You took Him away from me! And you left me all alone in this world.
Bray Wyatt: I did… I did what I thought was best for you.
[The man in the shadows steps into the light, revealing himself to be Uncle Howdy.]
Uncle Howdy: You’re a liar! You wanted to be with Him! You wanted to be Him! You didn’t care about any of us. Do you have any idea what it felt like for me? For us? Do you think this is what I wanted to become?
Bray Wyatt: When I let Him in, I remember our games. I remember the times we had together and although I can’t do anything about it, it warms my heart. I’m not ashamed to say I cried.
[Uncle Howdy tears off his mask.]
Taylor Rotunda: He erased you from the photographs. You are not my brother anymore!
Bray Wyatt: And yet… it always comes down to brothers, doesn’t it? Taylor Rotunda: This isn’t the end! I know you’re obsessed with masks but I will fight fire with fire and I will bring you back. I will end Him.
Bray Wyatt: I’m obsessed with a lot of things. Let me tell you something, as a friend. As a brother. You made a terrible mistake when you called me to this place. This place… it’s different. This is where they come to feed. They feed on our fears and they make us their vessels. Others have been here.
Taylor Rotunda: Kane?
Bray Wyatt: And others before him. The Prince of Darkness being one. This is the place where they whisper in our ears. This is the place where we come to visit them.
Taylor Rotunda: I don’t care. I will break this never-ending cycle of violence and hatred. I will bring you back from the place.
Bray Wyatt: You can’t. Nobody can.
Taylor Rotunda: Why?
Bray Wyatt: [Turning to the camera.] Because they’re here.
[A screeching sound fills the space. Kelley’s hand appears in front of Wyatt’s frozen face to turn the screen off the but screeching doesn’t stop. The lights begin the flicker as Kelley picks up the camera and prepares to run away but just as she turns to the door a woman with a dark veil and a tall man with an axe in his left hand block her way out. She turns around and realises there is no sign of The Undertaker just as the lights go out for good. The screeching stops to be replaced by screams of terror until the screen turns black and silent. After a few seconds, a finger dripped in red paint (or is it blood) writes: ‘I am talking to you’.] | 85
CAMERON GRIMES vs SETH ‘FREAKIN’ ROLLINS
 vs
Mauro Ranallo: … It goes without saying that we alerted the police as soon as we received this. We will keep you update but we have yet to hear anything.
Wade Barrett: Someone should have locked down these psychos a long time and thrown away the key.
Samantha Irvin: The following contest is set for one fall. Introducing first, accompanied to the ring by Dijak and his manager Angelina Love… from Burlington, North Carolina… weighing in at 220 pounds… ‘The Carolina Caveman’, Cameron Grimes!
Mauro Ranallo: Turning our attention to lighter matters (hopefully!), this is a big chance for Cameron Grimes to showcase his skills in a high-profile match, a couple of months after being called up to the main roster.
Wade Barrett: Bron Breakker turned Rollins’ Shield reunion upside down when he injected himself in that matchup. He’s bound to be distracted and that’s an opportunity Cameron Grimes has to grab with both hands.
Samantha Irvin: And his opponent… making his way to the ring… from Davenport, Iowa… weighing in at 225 pounds… He is a visionary, he is a revolutionary… Seth ‘Freakin’ Rollins!
Mauro Ranallo: The Eugene crowd is belting Seth Rollins’ battle hymn but despite the smile on his face, the former WWE champion can’t be happy with the events that played out earlier this evening, can he Wade?
Wade Barrett: I’d be fuming if I were him. Roman Reigns is injured. The most coveted title in WWE was there for the taking but now, he has to face another threat in the form of Bron Breakker, an opponent he knows little about.
Mauro Ranallo: Here we go and right of the bat, Grimes and Rollins are grappling in the middle of the ring. Rollins slaps in a side headlock but Grimes lifts him… Oh! Rollins lands on his feet and he hits back with a big right hand! The Carolina Caveman is staggering… Rollins goes to the apron… Springboard clothesline… Wow! Grimes countered with a standing dropkick and in a matter of seconds, the number one challenger for the WWE title finds himself in a spot of bother.
Wade Barrett: Grimes may not be the most subtle performer on RAW but he’s got all the tools to become a major player here and I fully expect him to prove it tonight.
Mauro Ranallo: I think Grimes isn’t done here. He’s lifting Rollins again… and he delivers a massive swinging side slam! He almost put him through the mat here! Meanwhile, the lovely Angelina Love and Dijak seem quite pleased with the turn this match has taken. Grimes is looking for another high-impact… but Rollins connects with a superkick out of nowhere!
Wade Barrett: I think he let his early success get to his head a bit. He’s still fairly new at this level, he will learn from such mistakes.
Mauro Ranallo: I didn’t know you could be so lenient, Wade. Rollins is back in the driver seat but you can see the first few minutes of this match have already taken a toll on him. Rollins… Oh! Big elbow from Grimes, who absorbed that superkick like a sponge. He hits the target with another big right hand but… wait a minute! Rollins dropped to the mat like a ton of bricks! There’s something fishy here! Wade Barrett: He caught him square on the side of the head. There’s nothing unusual about that, it happens all the time in boxing.
Mauro Ranallo: What is he throwing at Dijak then? That’s a brass knuckle! Of all the… Grimes goes for the cover… 1… 2… No! Rollins kicks out! I almost thought he had him there. But why on Earth would Cameron Grimes decide to fight dirty so early in this matchup? It doesn’t make any sense. The referee is onto Dijak’s case now but I’m afraid it’s too little, too late. What is he doing now? He’s conferring with Angelina Love… My God! She’s got shears in her bag! They’re crazy!
Wade Barrett: What’s the matter here. They’re trying to give this match a bit of an edge. It can’t hurt.
Mauro Ranallo: There’s nothing funny about that. This is an extremely volatile situation considering everything that has already transpired tonight. Unfortunately, the referee can’t do anything until Grimes actually uses a weapon. He’s running at Rollins with the shears held high… Rollins blocks it, thank God… and he catches Grimes off-guard with a knee to the gut. Another knee to the face… Oh! And the Avada Kedavra as the exclamation point!
Wade Barrett: See? Fear obviously brought the best out of your guy. And let’s not act as if Rollins was a paragon of virtue. We’re talking about a man who tried to scratch Rey Mysterio’s eye out of its socket.
Mauro Ranallo: This match has been going back and forth pretty much since the beginning but it looks like Rollins may have turned a corner here, catching Grimes flush across the face. Grimes is down, he’s not moving. Oh, I think Seth Freakin Rollins is going for a high-risk manoeuvre here…
Wade Barrett: If you throw the dice too often, you’ll get a result you won’t like eventually. These moves are called ‘high-risk’ for a reason.
Mauro Ranallo: I think Rollins wants to spend as little time as he wants in the ring, considering the way this match is heading. Rollins is ready… Phoenix Splash! Right on target! This is it! 1… 2… 3… No! A kick out from Cameron Grimes at the very last second! How did he survive that? Tremendous resilience on the part of the Carolina Caveman here, who doesn’t want to see this opportunity pass him by.
Wade Barrett: And rightly so. Angelina worked her as… erm, worked very hard to get him in the main event. A win against Seth Rollins is a must now.
Mauro Ranallo: Grimes is back to a vertical base but he looks worse for wear now… he misses wildly with a left hook… while Rollins connects with a superkick! Grimes won’t go down but Rollins clears the ring with a clothesline that sends him tumbling on the outside! Rollins is firmly in control now and he’s calling Grimes back into the ring. You can see the confidence on his face.
Wade Barrett: There’s a very fine line between confidence and foolhardiness and Seth Rollins is stepping on it at the moment. He claims he will beat Roman Reigns at Extreme Rules. I beg to differ.
Mauro Ranallo: Dijak and Angelina Love are trying to help Grimes back on his feet but he looks badly shaken. Oh-oh! I think Rollins won’t wait for him… off the ropes he goes… Suicide Di… Oh! Wow! Did you see that? Grimes caught him in mid-air with a spinning kick! What a devastating blow! He snuffed Rollins’ flurry like a candle. And Rollins, now defenceless in the worst part of town as Love, Dijak and Grimes look down upon him.
Wade Barrett: I told you spamming these high-risk moves would have consequences. Grimes is that close to winning the biggest match of his career now.
Mauro Ranallo: Grimes and Dijak are carrying Rollins up the ramp now. The referee is asking them to bring him back into the ring but they’re not listening. He can’t even begin a countdown with Angelina Love getting in his face every other second. They’re near the entrance now but Rollins is stirring back to life… Grimes quickly puts him back down, smashing his face against the LED screens. This is not looking good at all.
Wade Barrett: Whatever they intend to do, I can guarantee one thing – Seth Rollins will remember this night.
Mauro Ranallo: Dijak is helping him back up… Grimes is stepping back… Mamma Mia! Cave in! Cameron Grimes delivered a Cave in on the edge of the pit near the ramp! He literally squashed his head against the ground. I can’t see anyone coming back from such a blow. He’s probably got a commotion as we speak while Grimes and Dijak are high-fiving each other. Shocking scene developing here on Monday Night RAW as Seth Freakin Rollins finds himself in a dire situation, ladies and gentlemen.
Wade Barrett: As well he should. Listen, the WWE is a very dog-eat-dog environment. If you want to march to the beat of your own drum – like Rollins enjoys reminding everyone – you have to know someone, some day will gang up on you.
Mauro Ranallo: Dijak and Grimes are now dragging Seth Rollins back to the ring to finish this off and you can see that the Eugene crowd really aren’t on board with that idea. There are a couple of paper cups flying around at the moment. Love, Dijak and Grimes are all smiles at the moment. Wade, what would a defeat mean for Rollins here, two weeks away from a very important title match?
Wade Barrett: It would mean I was right all along. Seth Rollins is a coward. He only challenged Roman Reigns because he’s injured. He knows he wouldn’t stand a chance in a fair fight.
Mauro Ranallo: That’s a bold claim to make. They’re back at ringside as Dijak and Grimes taunt the crowd but Grimes looks ready to end this. He covers Rollins… 1… 2… 3… What? How did Seth Rollins raise his shoulder? Look at Grimes, he can’t believe it either! He’s dumbfounded! Rollins, out of pure instinct, keeps this match alive but for how long? He doesn’t even know where he is, he’s barely conscious!
Wade Barrett: Angelina Love is absolutely livid at the referee – and rightly so. His count wouldn’t have been slower if he tried. He’s in cahoots with Rollins!
Mauro Ranallo: So says you! Dijak is trying to defuse the situation as Love is that close to being expelled from ringside. It’s madness around here! Rollins is making a pass at Grimes, who saw him coming… Oh, my God! That’s horrible! Gruesome scene here! Rollins had picked up the shears and he put them through Grimes’ hand! This wouldn’t be out of a place in a horror movie!
Wade Barrett: I don’t hear you calling for Rollins’ disqualification…
Mauro Ranallo: Everybody stopped when they heard Grimes’ wail of pain and horror. He’s trying to remove the shears from his hand – I can’t even believe I’m saying this – but Rollins is relentless… He’s going for the Curb Stomp! No! Grimes counters with a back body drop! This is getting completely out of hand… pun unintended, of course. These two men have put each other through hell but they are still out there, trying to grab that elusive win by the scruff of the neck.
Wade Barrett: There’s a point where you need to draw the line and decide a win is not worth your career. Grimes has to realise he has to live to fight another day. Mauro Ranallo: Unfortunately, they’re both past that point now. When you’ve endured so much pain, you expect some kind of payoff. Rollins is in the corner, trying to get back up, while Grimes is finally rid of those shears. He won’t be able to use his right hand again but that doesn’t stop him from rushing back on… drop toe hold by Rollins… Holy…! Rollins somehow found the time to expose the second turnbuckle and Grimes hit it hard.
Wade Barrett: His forehead is bleeding profusely now. That scumbag practically murdered Grimes in the middle of the ring and he’s getting a title match as a reward.
Mauro Ranallo: When it comes to escalation, I think we can say that both sides share a responsibility. Dijak’s seen enough though. He’s on the apron… and Rollins sends him crashing down with a superkick! Rollins is on fire now! Grimes is trying to get back up but he’s barely conscious… Curb Stomp! Rollins hits the mark! That’s got to be it! 1… 2… 3! This is it! Rollins gets a hard-fought win tonight but why on Earth did Cameron Grimes bring all these weapons?
Wade Barrett: Who cares? At the end of the day, Rollins used them without a second of hesitation, proving to everyone tonight he’s a hypocrite.
Mauro Ranallo: Regardless of the circumstances, Cameron Grimes did push him to the limit and then some but Rollins still prevailed. How will the two former Shield members react to Bron Breakker’s addition to the WWE title match at Extreme Rules? Be there next week to find out – we will have a very special surprise for you! Goodnight, ladies and gentlemen!
Winner by pinfall: Seth Freakin Rollins in 15:29 | 77
Show rating: 84
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Post by armandopayne94 on Nov 9, 2024 12:04:59 GMT 1
What I dig about this series now is how prescient it is because AEW's currently doing a storyline where John Morrison is vibing with the Maximum Male Models.
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Post by mistersocko on Nov 11, 2024 9:20:46 GMT 1
Ha! I guess 'prescient' is the nice way of saying it - alternatively, you could say that my booking is so unremarkable that I've got the same ideas as everybody else. That said, that one was fairly obvious, given how vain Morrison's heel characters have been. The only thing special here is that there would be very few people (if any) who'd place him that high on the card in a major company. On a side note, I'm not sure being on a par with Tony Khan's booking should be considered as a good thing but that's another matter  |
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